Here we go again.....?
My husband is an admitted compulsive liar and I have put up with it for 23 years. We finally went to counseling and after 5 visits he decided she had helped him and we no longer needed to go. Now I found out he lied again. Not to me but someone at his work. What would anyone else out there do? I am so tired of putting all my energy into whether or not he lies all the time and he knows I told him if he lied I would leave. But 23 years is a looong time.Would anyone leave??
2007-06-01 02:01:11 · 12 answers · asked by confused one 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
the answer is NO
2007-06-01 02:05:19 · answer #1 · answered by mobi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do his lies harm people?
Do they cause your family public shame, or problems?
He has a compulsion, which I think is like an itch or a tick. He needs to find a reason and practice hard at not lying...he's bound to slip up.
Why are you so aggravated? You gave him an ultimatum. It's like he's your child or something. You said you're putting all of your energy into it. You're probably stressing the both of you out, when you need to calm down and deal with this rationally.
If you are unhappy with him completely, end the relationship. There's nothing more annoying than people that stay together and suffer just because they've been doing it for so long. What a waste of life.
2007-06-01 09:09:38 · answer #2 · answered by pola 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes i would leave if i was truly unhappy. Don't ever force yourself to stay with someone that does'nt make you happy. You have put up with it for 23 years now it's time to look after yourself and worry about your needs and wants.
But then again you are married and you vowed to stick by him no matter what. I think you should sit down and explain to him what this is doing to you. Explain to him that you are considering leaving him if he does not change becaue it's not fair on you and it's putting a strain on your relationship like it has done for 23 years and if he does not try and change at all that just means that he does not care about you and then leave him.
But give it one last chance. Best of luck xxxxxxx
2007-06-01 09:13:51 · answer #3 · answered by xxsummerxx232 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally I couldn't deal with the stress but since you have put up with it for 23 years, why does it matter more now? That is the question you need to answer before you decide to leave.
2007-06-01 09:10:22 · answer #4 · answered by dawnb 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband needs help. Try a psychiatrist instead of a counselor. No one is "cured" after 5 visits. Tell your husband he needs to stick with the counseling and stop telling lies or you're leaving. Then stick to your guns.
2007-06-01 09:10:08 · answer #5 · answered by retropink 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No. It's ruff living with a liar, you never know what to believe. Yes 23 years is a long time but you know now not to believe anything he says. Do your best to stay clam and ask him how he would feel if you lied to him..
2007-06-01 09:10:55 · answer #6 · answered by harold 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave, stay, did he lie, did'nt he lie, you would think after 23 years you would know the differance.
Everyone lies, dosn't some to me like a good reason to throw away 23 years.
2007-06-01 09:07:21 · answer #7 · answered by LG 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My previous partener was the same.......some of he lies he told!!! unfortunatley he will never change and you deserve a life ......you only get one so go for it and you will wonder why you put up with it for so long.
2007-06-01 09:08:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just leave. You don't have to put up with anything you don't want to put up with. This man is never going to change.
2007-06-01 09:07:40 · answer #9 · answered by sick_of_it_all 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would try a different counselor. The one you went to seems rather incompetent :-/
2007-06-01 09:06:36 · answer #10 · answered by Masha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you still love him,you should put up with his lies.If you don't,think it over.
2007-06-01 09:07:44 · answer #11 · answered by martha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋