ok. i have a problem. i want to get my life back together again, i've been slacking off, but it's hard. the thing is, i'm really really easily influenced by other people and when i'm friends with someone, i seem to get very emotionally, i don't know, warped or sth. no, i don't get needy, instead i feel like i'm responsible for the other person's happiness or sth, it sounds ridiculous i know but that's it, i just can't detach myself emotionally from the people i care about and i know others don't feel this way. i'm sick of feeling used. i'm sick of feeling responsible for other people's happiness. i'm sick of feeling responsible for everything. and i'm sick of getting all caught up and then finding out that other people don't feel as strongly as i do. i don't need them to feel this way either. i just want myself to stop! how do i do this?
2007-05-31 20:24:24 · 6 answers · asked by donna_pnctt 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
this is caused by low self esteem
1 esteem builder is to do things you like but harms no-one .... get help if you can proffesional type
2007-05-31 20:27:47 · answer #1 · answered by q6656303 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First: Take a deep breath
Second: Slowly let it out. You need to force yourself to detach. Maybe (I'M not trying to be rude, really) find something you are interested in for yourself. Get caught up in yourself. I'm not meaning be selfish just draw your line and stick to it. The more involved you become in your own life the less you need to live vicariously through others. You made your mistakes, and you have to let them make theirs. A true friend would just be there for them, as a friend not a gaurdian angel. You will feel better. Counselling also helps alot.
2007-05-31 20:33:56 · answer #2 · answered by maev 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know.
A few years back I was pretty tied into my friends and family, then I discovered that the vast majority of them were of the fair weather varity and that leason meant I starting getting a thicker skin around people.
I hope you don't go through anything like that but it might help you to know others are out there with similar problems.
2007-05-31 20:29:16 · answer #3 · answered by Harmon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its a matter of expectations. Your committment towards each of the relationship is and your contribution makes you expect from each of the relationships. I know its easy to say and difficult to implement that you expect less. I used to feel similarly at a point in time and i managed to overcome this by indulging myself in Music which relaxes me the most when i feel irritated by such a situation. Try it....try to do things that relax you more....
2007-05-31 20:46:02 · answer #4 · answered by achelles77 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, i'm used to be like that too but that was before.now,i'm moving on..sometimes, it is better if we just stay out of our friend's life.. trust me, i know. you just want to make people happy because you care but relax,you just have to step back and try not to interfere with it unless when you are needed. just move on and think about your happiness first before of others but don't be selfish.. get busy and try to find your happiness and rty not to burden by others happiness.. be the ear not the mouth..if your friends need help,just listen to what they've gotta say. if they ask your opinions, then you encourage them to make their own choices and their desicion must not be influenced by others opinions..try it out
2007-05-31 20:52:54 · answer #5 · answered by 2rist 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Happiness is a personal choice. It is not a gift from someone else. Our emotions belong to us alone. We decide how we feel, no one else decides for us. Once you have learned this valuable lesson you will have a much better life.
2007-05-31 20:31:46 · answer #6 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋