my pregnant wife allows me to rub her tummy and her back and her head but she still feels pain?

Question

I've told our DR. but she said we cant do much to help her. i'm lost and ion need of some womanly advice. can you all please keep up the help and THANK YOU ALL VERY MUCH. mahalo from hawaii

Answer 1

She may be able to take some Tylenol occasionally and it is so great that you are helping her. Pregnancy is very very uncomfortable sometimes. Some of the things that can make it more comfortable are:
Have her stay well hydrated and stay away from caffeine
Have her rest (shoot for 15 minutes with herr feet up for every 1-2 hours of housework/being on her feet)
Using a towel warmed in the dryer (no hot tubs etc) to help muscles relax
Getting plenty of potassium and calcium in the diet (bananas and milk!!!)
Keeping stress to a minimum (pregnancy is stressful enough)
Relaxing music (you would be surprised how much a nap in a recliner with some nice music in the background can help)

You are so great to help, I can't even get my hubby to take out the trash! Keep up the good work and mom and baby will have a great life with such a great guy to take care of them.

Answer 2

Sometimes the only thing that helps me is to just get in the swimming pool and float! It takes all the pressure of the baby off the back, pelvic bone, legs, buttocks, etc!

Also the walking thing does help. My husband has to coax me out the door with the promise of just going to the park and back...this is very close to our house...then when we get around the park...I'm like feeling a little better so I agree to go another block or two...eventually I have made it around our little mile circle. I never want to go but I always feel better after.

Answer 3

When we are pregnant our hormones are uncontrollable and cause us havoc. I suffered with hip, foot and back pain that kept me from sleeping for almost 6 months. Not to mention that when I finally did get to sleep I would wake up with charlie horses in my legs, feet and toes.

I Tylenol doesn't take the edge off for her try some pillows. I used to laugh at how my hubby would position my body with 3 or 4 different pillows at night. The truth is if he hadn't I would have been in worse pain. Walking and swimming kept me from becoming too stiff so maybe she could try that and also take the Tylenol before bed to prevent severe stiffness. Check with your OB but it was safe for me 2 yrs ago and I needed all of the help that I could get..

You are caring and supportive, good luck to you both.....

Answer 4

That's sweet that you try so hard to help you wife, but pregnancy can be a very uncomfortable thing. Sometimes there really is nothing that can be done. Sorry :( It sucks but just have her focus on the wonderful joy you 2 will be bringing into the world soon. :)

Answer 5

Just keep rubbing. She'll feel the love you give her, even though it doesn't stop the pain. Ask her what she needs you to do, and do it. Sometimes you'll have to keep rubbing, and sometimes it'll drive her nuts, and she'll tell you to stop, only for her to tell you to start again. Patience, patience, patience. It sounds like you're doing great. Keep it up. Good luck & congrats~

Answer 6

She should try some yoga, there should be a book on yoga for pregnant women. She would get some relief from this. also you can take her to Oriental doctor for acupuncture (make sure he or she is licensed & uses DISPOSABLE NEEDLES or CDC approved disinfection procedures, most of the docs today use the disposables because patients demand it!). Tell her the needles do not hurt if done by a skilled practitioner! If it hurts, get up & leave and find a new doctor of acupuncture! But it wont hurt if you hire an experienced practioner, ask people for recommendations!!! Also at many pharmacies you can get what's called a TENs machine, it produces a mild to moderate electrical stimuli which confuses the brains' pain signals and relieves the pain -- I often you it when pain meds dont stop the agony in my spine (I was hit by a drunk driver & my spine was badly damaged -- I live in continuous pain, the TENs machine always works -- sometimes it takes an hour or so of running it on my back, but it does work!!! And keep on rubbing her and gently rubbing coco butter into her tummy if it feels good to her -- it helps prevent stretch marks and eases those she already has! She may not feel like it, but you should make her do gentle exercises everyday! It will help relieve her pain now & will make the birth much easier!!! Get info from her GYN/OB doctor as to where you can find a DVD on maternity exercises that you can play at home on your DVD player!!! Make her do it for 30minutes a day. Or 2 - 15minute sessions!!! She MUST EXERCISE !!! Make her go for a 15minute walk with you EVERY EVENING & add 5 minutes each day until you work up to 30 to 45 minutes per night, walk slightly uphill if possible and walk at a good pace about 3mph, no less than 2-1/2mph (but 2mph is better than nothing, just she that she works up to 30minutes per day every day -- go with her of course -- this will help the birth too!!! Dont let her whine her way out of exercising, it may be uncomfortable at 1st, but soon she'll feel much better and learn to enjoy it!!! Also, dont allow her to over-eat, this will make her fat and if she gets fat or has gotten fat it will make the birth harder, it also puts extra stress on her back and legs and on her diaphram (where she breathes, it makes breathing hard & uncomfortable if a woman gains too much fatin pregnancy !!!!! She is not "eating for two" -- that's a fairytale !!! All she needs is 3 moderate, well-balanced meals per day: dairy products(skim milk, cheese, cottage cheese, yogurt); veggies (dark green leaf veggies, orange colored veggies like carrots & tomatoesand sweet potatoes, beets); fruits: aplles, pears, grapes, raisins, prunes, nectarines, oranges, bananas, & juices); grains: whole grain breads (try: Carb style by Pepperidge Farms -- it helps prevent gestational diabetes), whole grain cereals(most cereal companies are now using whole grains -- read the labels on box), whole grain rice, use whole grain flours in all baked goods; meats: lean beef (a good filet mignon every Friday night or a Porterhouse -- she'll want it rarer & rarer as time goes on!), lean pork, turkey (cook a small whole one or a turkey brest), chicken (not fried -- bake, put in casseroles, grill it, BBQ it, or put on rotisserie!) -- stay away from ground meats as they can contain high levels of antibiotic resistant bacteria!!! and/or paracites!!! she doesnt need those problems now -- no spam either!!! : it is ground & VERY FATTENING !!!). HAVE HER DRINK 8 X 8OUNCES OF WATER per day that has been PURIFIED by a process called REVERSE OSMOSIS: it says on the label! It's safest!
If you two follow all these steps she should get relief. She'll shed a few pounds that may be making her very uncomfortable and she'll keep her body pliable and strong for the birth and it will help her get her figure back quickly !!!
P.S. -- If your doctor wont give you a RX for a TENs machine, they make less powerful units like I have which is called: Sport Massager # HV-F002A, it is made by OMRON COMPANY. You can write or look on net for them: OMRON HEALTHCARE, INC., Vernon Hills, Illinois 60061. Don't use anywhere except: lower back, neck, and shoulders. DO NOT USE NEAR THE BABY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! iT WILL EASE HER lower back pain , SHE CAN RUN IT FOR 15MINUTES AT A TIME OR RESET IT & RUN IT UP TO AN HOUR ON THE LOWER BACK. aSK HER DOCTOR IF THAT'S ok, IT SHOULD BE. sHE CAN ALSO USE IT FOR NECKSTRESS AND SHE CAN USE IT WHEN NO ONE IS THERE TO HELP HER AS i KNOW YOU CANT ALWAYS BE THERE -- YOU MUST GO TO WORK! tHIS LITTLE MACHINE WILL GIVE HER A LOT OF PAIN RELIEF, i PROMISE!!! tHEY COST ABOUT $60 OR MAYBE $70. kEEP THE ELECTRO PADS IN A PLASTIC BAG, SEALED TIGHTLY CLOSED WHEN NOT IN USE SO THAT PADS DONT DRY OUT!!!
whoops sorry for all those capital letters, didnt realize it was on !!
I had no help when I was pregnant, but I was very young and very healthy, so I had an easy pregnancy, although no one helped me with the birth -- I was just a baby myself & they shut me away in a cold, sterile room all alone all night, I was scared to death, I didnt know what was happening to my body or what to expect. I thought I was going to die all alone and my baby too !!! I was 15 !!! Terrible! People just didnt understand or empathize back then (1970).
I send you my best wishes & I wish I was there to help. I'll be coming to Hawaii in the next 30 to 45 days. Let me know if you two need help, or help with the baby too. Aunt Barbie NAPLES, FLORIDA I am a mom & Granny of 3 wonderful kids !!! ALOHA

Answer 7

There's really nothing you can do, but you're a wonderful husband for trying.

Answer 8

SHES GOING TO STILL FEEL PAIN NO MATTER WHAT RUBBING IT WILL NOT HELP