Sex - it is almost non existent - I am in shape and interested but my husband looks at porn instead of at me!?

Question

I have been in shape all my life. A lot of people compare how I look to that of Angelina Jolie so I know I am not unattractive. Guys still hit on me even though I am married. But I can count within both hands the number of times my husband & I have had sex in the last year. Remarkably after 3 yrs of talking about it I did get prego, 7 mos now. I haven't lost my shape at all, from the back I still have an hour glass figure-& my chest is really quite large: 34DDD, so my body is still small - plus my belly isn't that big:we've talked about having sex & enjoying each others company-he gets that it won't hurt me or the baby & that it is a healthy activity.
This has obviously been going on since before I got prego-I really need some advice. My husband looks at porn online a lot, usually when he thinks I'm in bed asleep. I have told him the porn bothers me, I am no prude, mind you-how am I to compete with it? He gets emails & he writes the girls back, I'm married but you r hot!
Help!

Answer 1

This is a huge problem in a lot of marriges, including, the same thing happened with mine. If this was going on before your pregnancy, then I would say that "porn" is one of those thing that does not require any emotion. There are a lot of men (women too) that would rather masterbate than to have "emotional" sex. I would suggest counseling. I learned a lot from my counselor, but if you all don't get it resolved now, it will only create bigger problems.

Answer 2

Ugh. Porn's an addiction. I take it he won't admit that that's the problem? I think I'd confront. I'd ask him to admit he's addicted, then when he denies it I would suggest that he walk the talk: give it (and sleazy correspondence with net.hos) up, completely, for six full weeks, just to prove it isn't an addiction and that it's not the source of his loss of interest in sex. I'd wager he couldn't do it and dare him to try. I'd also ask him how he'd feel if he wanted me, but I was getting off on porn and flirting with strangers online every night, so I was rejecting him almost every time. I kinda like mesquite's idea about barging in and turning off the computer --- but I hafta say that I'd be so viscerally repulsed (at least, while I am pregnant, maybe not normally) by the sight of my husband with a big hardon for some porn shot, that I couldn't bring myself to throw myself at him. I guess if you wanna, you could try ... and if he went limp, it'd sure start a conversation. Sex usually gets better - if less frequent - a while after childbirth, and you don't wanna be missing out on that. Good luck.

Answer 3

some guys are just not into pregnant women. they don't see their wives as sexual objects anymore, but as a vessell carrying their unborn child.

perhaps you could try coming onto him more...one night while he's looking at porn on the computer, walk up to him, shut off the computer monitor, kneel in front of him, and initiate sex with him via oral stimulation.

my wife did that one night...and it was the LAST time I looked at porn on the internet.

Answer 4

some males don't like to have sex with a pregnant girl. wait until after you have the baby and then see what happens. if he continues to look at porn instead of being interested in you then have him catch you looking at naked males on the Internet and then see if he changes his tune!!!

Answer 5

I have been there and my advice is to either seek marriage counseling or kick his *** out. Believe me it will eat away at your self confidence and the last thing you need right now is that. Maybe you should speak to a professional alone as well. Know that you are not the only one that this has happened to.

Answer 6

My husband looks at porn too. But He sure doesn't write anyone back. Talk to him....or go talk to a counsler with out him.

Answer 7

you need to have a long talk with him..let him know that you dont like how he is acting. Tell him that you have needs. Try seducing him..get him horny..put something sexy on. Personally i consider watching porn cheating but that's just me

Answer 8

Girl if your man rather watch porn then u, then theres a problem. And + he rites to gurls!!! try to seduce him and get all freaky and put on sum see thru clothes to c if it works. Get ur little strawberries and whip cream to make it sexy. Work with wat u have honey and show it all off to him. Maybe that will make him stop watching porn and riting bak to gurls.....

Answer 9

This isn't a great situation for a baby to born in. You need to sort it out with him, and he needs to get his act together or I'm guessing that he is going to loose you altogether.

Answer 10

if hes not interested in making love to u and he only wants porn and other women.. u deserve so much better.. evaluate whats important and take care of u and ur baby..