My friend is divorced . He and his ex -- wife
have a little boy . His ex -- wife keeps depending on
him for various favors .
When she had a turtle, she kept pestering him to
help her take care of it . She used to borrow money
from him, but that's over with . We don't know if
she's going to start again . She used to make him baby
-- sit her son from a previous marriage, who he
despises .
She talked him into returning a drum set, a pair
of shoes, a small dishwasher, a few movies, a bottle
of lotion, and an exercise machine over a four day
period .
When she had him return the exercise machine, she
kept him waiting for seven hours while she found the
receipt . We wound up going to her house on Memorial
Day when we didn't really want to go .
My friend thinks doing her favors and socializing
with her is inappropriate . These time -- consuming
favors and this socializing interferes with his life .
Is there a nice diplomatic way to put a stop to these
favors and this socializing ?
2007-05-31 09:56:19 · 14 answers · asked by I_hate_being_single 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
There's no nice way about it. She always has relied on him and for whatever reason they broke up she still think he will be there. Try counceling for the kids sake. He also has to remember even if he doesnt like the little boy, he's still his son's brother. so he doesnt have a choice on that. She needs to become more independant and counceling might help her. He cant always give in but he needs to help her out. Suport him in either way, but dont give him **** about it. Its hard enought on him in the first place.
2007-05-31 10:01:00 · answer #1 · answered by Lyndsey R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe your friend should look at what he's doing. Everytime she needs him to be there for her he is there. To her that means "he still wants to be with me." The only thing they have in common right now is their child. When it's his time to be with his son that's all it should be. Let her know that things have been over for a long time now, and us hanging out has to stop. I can no longer give you money, or move your furniture, or hang around when you need me too. When it comes to her other child, he has to be honest. "She use to make him babysit her other son". She's not your mother, so she shouldn't be able to make you do anything you don't want to do. Tell her NO, I have my own life now, and you need to find someone else to watch your son. Maybe his father perhaps? Keep your head up because once you stand up to her games they will stop. As long as she's got you right where she wants you this will never end. All you have to say is NO.
2007-05-31 10:09:54 · answer #2 · answered by Sweet 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the element which you're no longer attentive to is: woman be apologetic approximately boy yet waits for him to take place braveness and save on along with her whether no longer in the relation. Boy will become clever and shall we that fellowship blossom extra and wins the ladies have confidence exact and ultimately after various issues and suggestions by skill of sticking mutually in puzzling circumstances woman additionally Falls in love with the boy woman and Boy stay luckily ever after desire this enables
2016-10-09 05:15:32 · answer #3 · answered by drago 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He should tell her that the only relationship they have now is that they share custody of their son, and they only need to interact on issues that deal with the welfare and upbringing of the son. When she asks him favors or wants something from him, he should give a firm no without having to make any excuses. If he keeps giving in to her behavior, she's going to keep it up. That's not mean. He wants to get on with his life, and she needs to learn to do the same.
2007-05-31 10:02:23 · answer #4 · answered by justme 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does she return the favor?
It's good to maintain a good status with your ex but it seems like she's sort of depending on him too much.When they separated, they separated for good.She needs to understand that.He can talk to her nicely about that.It's not that she asks for favors is that she constantly depends on him.He needs to tell her he's not the help or her puppet.He has to make his own life.
Best of luck to your friend.
2007-05-31 10:01:10 · answer #5 · answered by Marla 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A favor is just that--a favor. Your friend is under no obligation to do favors for his ex-wife. If he feels that way, he can just tell his ex-wife that he's not doing her anymore favors. He's a big boy and he doesn't have to do anything he doesn't want to do.
2007-05-31 10:09:02 · answer #6 · answered by wizball 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i think tht his ex-wife might want to get back together wit him or something...and if he doesnt want to do things wit her y is he doing it?? and she cant have court orders or anything that tell him to do her favors or anything./..so if he wants to stop doing her favors he should stop or do something about it
hope i helped
gud luck
2007-05-31 10:02:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they are trying to still be friends then its ok. If he doesn't want to be her friend he needs to tell her he doesn't have the time. That he needs space. Its his call, You can only be taken advantage of if you let it happen.
2007-05-31 10:05:11 · answer #8 · answered by stefani h 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Once he is divorced then there is no point in turning bad. Ask ur frnd to make it clear to her.
2007-05-31 10:01:36 · answer #9 · answered by Smile- conquers the world 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe he should stop being a wimp and remind his ex that they are divorced.
2007-05-31 10:00:21 · answer #10 · answered by pola 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋