My husband is very mean sometimes for some reason( sometimes there are no reason) I don't know when he is upset with something he tells me that I should be "greatful" and "thankful" of him whatever he has done for me( we have a nice house, car and all essential things for a goodlife) since I am not working and taking care of a baby at home( I am new to this country) whatever he said it hurts me so much the way he said. Is he being mean? because it made me feel like I am unemployed fpr now and he also said that I am dependent on him. It's still hurting. Is he being verbally abusive with me? Eventhough he seems to be a nice guy (except some issues we have). Please help me. Thanks
2007-05-31 08:23:30 · 9 answers · asked by hondolkk 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think sometimes there are men that marry foreign women because they think they are going to be more subservient. A lot of American women just won't put up with this kind of treatment anymore. You shouldn't either. You should tell him that it hurts your feelings and that he needs to realize that your marriage is a partnership and that you are an equal and valid partner.
If he stayed at home with the baby and realized what real work it is, he might not take you so for granted. It is real work!
He should be greatful & thankful that he has a wife at all with that attitude.
2007-05-31 08:34:02 · answer #1 · answered by Life is Crazy, so am I 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He's taking advantage of you and disrespecting you and knows that you are inbetween a rock and a hard place, which means that you have almost no choice but to put up with it.
Is there any chance that you could find work somewhere? It would help you feel more empowered.
If you absolutely can't find work then why don't you find other women from your culture that will be supportive.
I sense that this situation is going to get worse if you don't act now and show some independence and confidence.
Good luck.
2007-05-31 08:33:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes he is being verbally abusive. Do this, leave the baby with him and go back to work, tell him you don't want to be dependent on him anymore because he is an @$$hole. Tell him your going back to work and you both will share the responsibility of raising the child.
Being a mother is the most unappreciated job in the entire world. You father-in-law probably treated his wife the same way and your husband waching them is now doing the same to you.
He has abused you enough verbally and enough is enough. You have to stand up for yourself instead of whining in here, or else you will force your self to live an abusive life. If you try to be physically abusive, dial 911, get his @SS in jail.
2007-05-31 08:36:47 · answer #3 · answered by jimmy.parker06 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If he provides for you and the baby, do you really think you should not be grateful and thankful for your nice house, car and essential things? Lots of people don't have what you have.Get off your prima donna diva high horse and look around you. Most females have to work now-a-days. They're not privilaged like you to be allowed to stay home and take care of their child. And quit your whining and enjoy the time you have with your baby. They grow up so fast.
2007-05-31 08:32:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you should first start off by telling him how you feel or if you are scared too, tell someone else, someone close to you maybe. It could be verbal abuse depending on how bad it is, but as long as he is not physically abusing you. You should still let someone know!
2007-05-31 08:31:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's being very cruel. Try to find a babysitter or daycare you can trust and get a part time job. If that doesn't help at least you will have a little money to help yourself.
2007-05-31 08:31:42 · answer #6 · answered by goodbye 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please don't listen to the people on this sight if you are new to this country.
People on this site represent a short sight judgmentally bored section of society.
If you want an unbiased perspective I would go to a neighborhood church and talk to a priest. Women in the US have a tendency to think they are always being repressed.
2007-05-31 08:45:09 · answer #7 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yup....and why dont you get a part time job or something small to gain some independence for yourself.
thats why i dont understand why women go into relationships and dont work and expect the man to take care of EVERYTHING. do something yourself. contribute something financially so he can shut up about you being "thankful or grateful".
2007-05-31 08:29:48 · answer #8 · answered by knk724 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
apparently you arent doing enough for him. ask him what else needs to be done.
2007-05-31 08:31:58 · answer #9 · answered by s_j_hatton 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋