Politics for dummies... cute, is it not?

Question

DEMOCRAT
You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful

REPUBLICAN
You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
So?

SOCIALIST
You have two cows.
The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.

COMMUNIST
You have two cows.
The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
You wait in line for hours to get it.
It is expensive and sour.

CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows.
You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows.
Under the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one, milk the other, and then pours the milk down the drain.

AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses.
Your stock goes up.

FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
You go to lunch and drink wine.
Life is good.

JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
Most are at the top of their class at cow school.

GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.

TALIBAN CORPORATION
You have all the cows in Afghanistan , which are two.
You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private parts.
You get a $40 million grant from the US government to find alternatives to milk production but use the money to buy weapons.

IRAQI CORPORATION
You have two cows.
They go into hiding.
They send radio tapes of their mooing.

Wow Jill - it must be real tough to get through these hard times without a sense of humor!!

"At the height of laughter, the universe is flung into a kaleidoscope of new possibilities." ~Jean Houston

i'm very sorry for your loss

Answer 1

Many a true word uttered in jest.......

Answer 2

Not funny to me,in light of the fact that we are in the middle of a big messy battle, trying to bring about peace in other country's, and between parties.
Responsible people know when & what to say, especially in these days, when we as good Americans, should not be mocking or so called joking, but standing tall with positive remarks, and not making up such so called funny garbage as this, to spread out over the world to show how low we Americans are stooping. The more you stir it people, the more it stinks. ~~jill

Answer 3

If that is so true, look at the last eight years. I disagree. Americans have a right to vote for who we want. Just because you lost the election and want the white man to win doesn't make those who voted for Obama dummies. You need to stop being sore losers and move on with your life. I don't think you're black either. If you are, you have issues. You sound like a racist and hate your own black race. ;))

Answer 4

Excellent! Another fine question! Can I borrow the Two Thumbs up that I give you earlier? I'd like to give `em to you now!

Answer 5

The iraq one made me laugh out loud!

Answer 6

Nice!! I think my favorite was French Corporation... so true.

Answer 7

LOL! I like the Iraq one the best - that is too funny!!

Answer 8

Cute,really cute.

Answer 9

Another good one, Lucky. Keep it up!

Answer 10

Perfect...Don't single anybody out...laugh at everyone! LOL!