2007-05-31 06:35:43 · 12 answers · asked by bananas! 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
I'm not heavy!
2007-05-31 23:09:02 · answer #1 · answered by Master Strategist 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
here is a joke too lighten everyone up.
Sam and Greg lived in a retirement center and were sitting on a bench under a tree when Greg turned to the Sam and said, "Sam, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?"
Sam says, "Well, I feel just like a newborn baby."
Greg Said, "Really! Like a baby!?"
To which Sam replied...
"Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just s.hit myself."
Aging Mildred was a 93-year-old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband, Earl. She decided that she would just kill herself and join him in death. Thinking that it would be best to get it over with quickly, she took out Earl's old Army pistol and made the decision to shoot herself in the heart, since it was so badly broken in the first place.
Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become a vegetable and burden someone, she called her doctor's office to inquire as to just exactly where the heart would be on a woman.
The doctor said, "Your heart would be just below your left breast."
Later that night, Mildred was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound to her knee....
2007-05-31 20:24:00 · answer #2 · answered by castro 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, don't have a cow!!! I'm lightening up as we speak
2007-05-31 13:42:43 · answer #3 · answered by Nickynackynoo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hope your not talking to me cos I`ve just had a big bab and I feel as light as the proverbial feather.
2007-05-31 13:47:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, just let me know where Michael Jackson got his bleach from and I'll be light as snow for ya in no time!!!
2007-05-31 14:31:05 · answer #5 · answered by buff1ne 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is this a question?? lighten up to what?? and why???
2007-05-31 14:33:08 · answer #6 · answered by ringo711 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ok just switched on with some chocolate
2007-05-31 13:38:34 · answer #7 · answered by moocher 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can't reach the light switch... i need one of those poking stick things...
2007-05-31 16:09:08 · answer #8 · answered by sparkle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I lighened up anymore I would blind people with my pasy white skin!
2007-05-31 13:39:14 · answer #9 · answered by punch 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm trying honest!
2007-05-31 14:26:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋