What's the funniest thing you ever saw, heard or experienced?

Question

I can't believe no similar questions came up!

C'mon, we all need a laugh!

Thanks.

Answer 1

I was at a very fancy casino in Puerto Banus, Spain. It was a hot spot for the elite rich. It didn't just have hundreds of expensive yachts anchored there, one of the yachts had its own heliport.

In the casino was some wanna-be Arab playboy. He was wearing some '70s style disco shirt with gold chains around his neck, and a lot of disgusting chest hair popping out from underneath this gaudy disco shirt.

A special roulette table was reserved just for him. He spent a full ten minutes putting these oversized chips in what seemed to be every conceivable combination. He obviously had no clue what he was doing, but I think he was primarily interested in impressing some beautiful blonde women who were watching with amazment at the quarter million dollars in chips he had just placed on the table.

He was starting to go bald, had a big stomach, but you could tell from his smug sneers he thought he was really hot, and loved showing off to impress the ladies.

The roulette wheel began spinning, and I realized he had bet on all but four numbers! That's a really stupid way to bet.

The Arab playboy was mugging for the ladies. You could tell we was ready to motion for them to join him once the wheel finished spinning and he collected his winnings. When the ball dropped onto the number twelve the blondes started laughing without restraint and walked away. Twelve was one of the four numbers the greasy playboy hadn't bet on!

The woman laughed about what a total doofus he was.

Answer 2

We headed out to the lake one day, and hubbys 2 kids were in the bed of the truck. Well, right when we pulled up to the water, there was a loud pop. It was a soda pop bottle that had exploded from the heat and the glare of the water... and it flew into the air and hit our truck. Left a pretty good dent. We were just glad it didnt hit one of the kids. It really wasnt funny, but very weird, indeed.*

Answer 3

One of my good friends being a dumb ****. He poured like a gallon of gasoline on this wood pile, got a lighter then lit it. Shall we say that he needed some flying lessons, and had to go to the hospital for burns. Only 1st and 2nd degree burns though. It wasn't funny while he was hurt. But I looked at it on youtube...funniest thing I've seen ever lol. God bless him though, he's okay, and maybe he learned a lesson.

P.S. Even funnier...his dad was behind the camera...

Answer 4

My cousin and I straightened out a metal hanger and shoved it into and electrical socket. We blistered up our hands real good and started a fire which thankful my mother was able to put out. lol. Yeah that is funny now but not back then.



I personally know a guy (named Paul) who went on a waterslide and kept getting stuck while going down. It was the material his shorts were made of that kept getting him stuck. Well, the next guy in line was allowed to go down and he was a rather large fellow. This guy got some speed and was going down the slide super fast. Paul kept trying to push himself along to get to the bottom before this other guy ran into him. Finally Paul makes it to the bottom and right before he slides off into the pool the guy behind him hits him. They both went under water and it took them a while before they came up for air. Well, this other guy had somehow slid into our friends shorts! So they got the other guy out of our friends shorts and the rest of the day Paul had to hold up his shorts because all the elastic had be torn and he had nail marks down his back from the other guys feet.

Answer 5

One would be the story of the woman who got shot by a flying biscuit...

This woman was sitting in her car on a hot day in a grocery store parking lot, slumped over the wheel with her hand on the back of her head. Two guys noticed her and thought she looked like she needed help. So they stopped and asked her if she was ok. She said she thought she had been shot. She said she heard a loud pop and something hit her neck, so she put her hand back there and she felt something mushy, like her brains were falling out.
The guys told her to move her hand so they could see it and low and behold there was a raw biscuit stuck to the back of her neck.
What happened was, she bought a tube of those PIllsbury biscuits, it was super hot that day and when she put her bags in the car, the heat caused the tube to explode and make the popping sound, the biscuit went flying and smacked her on the back of the head. LMAO!!

Answer 6

Jim Carey and Jeff Daniels singing the mockingbird song in Dumb and Dumber.... That is the funniest effin thing EVER!!!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=CrbKn5boVPA

Answer 7

I read in a teen magazine YEARS and YEARS ago that featured most embarrasing stories. This girl was at her boyfriends house and they were in the spa she took off her top. She farted and it made bubbles, she got embarrased and leaped out and ran into the house, and right into his parents coming home, topless and all!!!!
Gotta love it
Somehow after reading that about 15 years ago it stuck in my head. Too funny.

Answer 8

Saw: Midget wrestle a package of breakfast sausage and lose.
Heard: Blind old man singing "Beat it"
Experienced: Uncle Ralph's vasectomy.

Answer 9

i was parked in my car eating an orange, and had the window a few inches open....and all of a sudden i turn left and see a bird coming right at me-as if it wanted to get in...and when i yelled all the orange came flying out out lol

Answer 10

there was this guy in my 5th grade class and he had an older huge brother that went to our school. well his older brother came into our class room, walked over to his brother, dropped something on the floor, and when he went down to pick it up he let out the loudest fart i have ever heard, right in his brothers face. if was so ronchi that we had to leave the class room.