'If You Get Pregnant i'll Leave You'?

Question

So I have posted something else which mentions this indirectly. I thought it was a perfectly okay thing for him to say to me, I mean if he does't want kids fair enough. But people seem to disagree. Can I have some opinions?

Answer 1

if that's how he feels he shouldn't be having sex. it's different if you saboutage the situation and get pregnant on purpose. but other that doing it intentionally against his wishes, i think that's a very immature and irresponsible thing to say. and it shows he doesn't love you. if you love someone, an accidental pregnancy wouldn't change your desire to be with them. if he really doesn't want kids, thats something you should think about if you intend for the relationship to be long term, and make a backup plan in case you do get pregnant, like discuss adoption.

Answer 2

Well, a girl doesn't get "herself" pregnant, does she?

That said, the only 100% effective birth control method is abstinence. Yep. Close up shop.

No, I'm not trying to preach some kind of doctrine at you - I'm just stating a medical FACT - Abstinence is the only 100% effective birth control. Every one of the others carries at least some risk of pregnancy.

So all you can do is say, Sorry buddy - but you said if I got pregnant, you'd leave. Well, again I'm just making absolutely sure that doesn't happen.

Perhaps he should rethink that ultimatum - As long as you're faithful with your birth control - I'll be with you. If you don't want to be on a medically approved birth control program, then we're through.

OR if he's dead set on never having children - why doesn't he take matters into his own hand and get a vasectomy? Or is he too much of a coward?

Finally - girl, you should rethink this man. If he's trying to control your reproductive choices - what else in your life does he control? This will only get worse, by the way - he'll end up abusing you. Promise. I"ve seen this before.

Answer 3

If he was upfront about it to you from the beginning, then yes, this is a perfectly okay thing for him to say. If you have changed your mind and now want children, leave the relationship. For God's sake, don't get pregnant by someone that doesn't want to be a dad. We have enough orphaned children in this world.

Answer 4

It's a bit on the rude side to say it that way. He should talk about it in a more friendly way. And like give reasons why he don't want a kid and stuff.

Answer 5

He might have put it a little better, but he is being honest about how he feels. Not everyone wants kids and it is good to know that rom the start.

Answer 6

Thats horrible that he said that. What kind of man is he? I mean he took the initiative to sleep with you and now he doesnt want to take the consequences. You dont need his dumbass, let him leave u, then get him for child support (and lots of it). If he's not gonna help raise your son/daughter then he can help support them financially at least.

Answer 7

It seems a very immature and self-absorbed thing to say. You don't get pregnant all by yourself there! I would be sorely tempted to respond, "If you get me pregnant I will sue you for child support, so you might wanna think about wearing a condom."

Answer 8

It is rude of him to say that
even if you are always protected during sex there is always a chance that you can become pregnant - what then if it happens you need to know what he will do about it if it ever comes to that.

Answer 9

have you had s.e.x if so odds are you will want to do it again so if you get pregnant i would not leave him i would stay with him my mom did the same thing and she said it was so hard. trust me you will need the extra help. take my addvise

Answer 10

Honesty is the best policy.