OK my wonderful byf of 8 mo has a bit of a jealous streak. It is in no way out of control and he's very good about it. I never realized it because I never really had a very healthy relationship before, but I have a jealous streak as well. A few nights back, we went out together with some friends, he doesn't ignore me and he's okay with subtle signs of PDA & me too - nothing overboard. ANyways as we were leaving he ran into this woman he usto know and was chatting for about ten minutes and did not introduce me. I am sure that this woman is no threat at all & I am very confident in his love for me, but do men really do this. I was pretty jealous that he did not even introduce me to her & this is the first time it's happened, but I was surprised that I would feel this way & I don't know how to explain it or tell him how it made me feel, he knew I was jealous because I grabbed his hand and gave him a tug - so he knew, but whats up with it?
2007-05-30 05:56:17 · 9 answers · asked by martiek7 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Men don't think. Although a woman would realize that it's polite to introduce their bf to everyone, that thought doesn't occur to men. Actually, he probably thought that *she* wasn't worth introducing to you - not the other way around.
I had this same prob with one of my bfs. Our relationship was great, but he just wasn't formally introducing me to any of his friends. I pointed that out to him after a couple of times. And then when we encountered someone shortly thereafter, he asked, "Trent, do you know Melenie?" And Trent said, "We've never actually been introduced," my bf looked at me & said, "I guess I am kinda bad about that."
Just talk to your bf. I'm sure he didn't realize what he was doing.
2007-05-30 06:04:28 · answer #1 · answered by yowza 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-04-22 20:06:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you both need a little maturing to get over jealousy. Put it this way, if he might consider cheating, who is he more likely to do it to? Someone who loves and trusts him 100% and constantly makes him feel great, or someone that gives him the 9th degree anytime he speaks or looks at another woman? Face it, some people just ARE lyers and cheaters, and you won't change them. Most are on the fence though, and you'll keep them home and faithful by making them feel great.
As for this particular situation, yeah, it sounds like he's keeping options open. He probably sees your flaws and questions if you're marraige material, so he's staying chummy with his ex, not telling her about your relationship, and if you screw up, he'll have a possible fallback.
How do you deal with it? Keep your eyes open, but don't make it obvious you're concerned. Concern means lack of confidence, and if you're not sure you're the right one for him, why should he buy into it!? Love him, make him feel like he's the greatest guy in the world, and you might soothe any concerns he has over long term commitment. If he's still not introducing you to those old ex-s in a few months, you'll need to move on if you're looking for a stronger commitment and relationship. I'll agree with Angel above that it's not bad to talk calmly about it either, but if he always introduces you to his friends and just "accidentally" missed this one, he's keeping options open...
2007-05-30 06:11:02 · answer #3 · answered by chris m 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The worst thing you can do is to let it go or let it pass like nothing happened. You have to sit down with him and explain how you felt at that moment, a very good way to make him realize how you felt would be by telling him to imagine he was in your shoes, then ask him. How would you feel about it?
Communication is the key to any good relationship. As long as you can communicate each other your feelings good or bad, you relationship should be very healthy and last forever and best of all, always happy.
2007-05-30 06:05:16 · answer #4 · answered by Angel Alvarez 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Interesting question. As a guy I can tell you that no matter how hard we try we are sometimes just absent minded. I forget to introduce people to each other all the time. So that's no biggie. Just tell him that it's rude not to introduce people to each other and he will understand.
Good luck :)
2007-05-30 06:00:51 · answer #5 · answered by Tourang B 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As I read your story I was going to be on your bfs side and say maybe he was excited b/c he hasnt seen her in a long time but when you wrote you grabbed his hand and gave it a tug that is when he should have said oh sorry this is my gf. Ask him what is the relationship with this other women did you date before or what ever. But there is no excuse for him to not intruduce you.lol
2007-05-30 06:13:21 · answer #6 · answered by sweetpea 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would have introduced myself to try and trigger a proper introduction. It could have been somebody he dated a few times and he didn't know how or what to introduce her as. I'd tell him it bugged you that way it doesn't happen later on.
2007-05-30 06:01:46 · answer #7 · answered by ~ ♥ ~ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Next time, smile, stick out your hand and introduce yourself. Get over the jealousy, it is a wasted emotion and benefits nobody.
2007-05-30 06:01:55 · answer #8 · answered by sleepingliv 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't think too much of it. It is just a small thing that people forget to do sometimes. Yes it can be hurtful if you think about it too much, but try not to let it bother you. Just talk to him and tell him how you felt about it. It is just something silly to be jealous about anyways.
2007-05-30 06:02:41 · answer #9 · answered by Seeks the Answers 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he just didn't think it was worth your time and was showing you in a typical man way. Sometimes we just don't think. We can only think of a couple things at a time.
2007-05-30 05:59:55 · answer #10 · answered by madbaldscotsman 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋