I've been in a lesbian relationship for 5 1/2 years, I have 2 children 14 and 8. Recently my daughter (the 8 yr old) moved to a new school and the bigger kids have started to make fun of her "moms". This never happened at her old school.She was only 3 when I met my gf so she doesn't really know any different. What do I say to her about this? I don't want her to get the idea that being gay is wrong.
2007-05-30 05:55:58 · 14 answers · asked by stacelee 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Give her the choice to live with her father? No matter where she lives i'm still her mother and I'm still gay. Anyone who doesn't agree with my life, Fine! but I'm looking for answers that will actually help my daughter.
2007-05-30 06:45:49 · update #1
I'm a gay mom too. I would just make sure she is armed with educated things to say in return to the bully kids, and I would 100% talk to her teacher and the school because this is harassment and it should not be tolerated anymore than a white kid calling a black kid harassing names.
That being said, kids will make fun of each other over anything. Over having short hair, or not having the right brand of shoes. It is very important that you find other families like your own so that she can see and identify with other healthy families too, and play with other kids who have two mommies or two daddies or one Mexican parent and one white parent..etc.etc...
Oh, and the answerer anjanalondon's intelligent question of the week was "Whats with the thing that men like big boobs?" She lacks depth, intelligence, kindness and education. Unfortunately her 'type' is basically everywhere and there is not much you can do about that.
And to rumpranger666... kids that age absolutely do not always know right from wrong. And even when they do- they don't always choose to do the right thing. If they did, they would be treated as adults. Were the Columbine murderers doing the "right" thing by killing kids that they didn't agree with? Jesus No! And these kids harassing this young lady are no more entitled to harming her than the Columbine kids were entitled to kill other children. That is ludicrous. I am praying for the well being of your own children.
2007-05-30 06:05:34 · answer #1 · answered by quirky 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Tell her kids become mean when they are insecure about themselves. People are homophobic because they are afraid they might be gay and don't know how to deal with that idea. And If your daughter didn't have a gay mom the mean kids would either pick on her for something else or find someone else to pick on.
Just reinforce her sense of self-worth - you can't do anything about what other kids do but other people cannot hurt our feelings unless we let them.
And your daughter may feel some resentment towards you for making her different from the other kids. (I have a 14 YO daughter too, and fitting in wth their social group is probably the BIGGEST thing in their life right now).
Just realize that if you weren't a lesbian, she still might be mad at you for giving her red hair or knobby knees or something else. 14 year old girls seem to invent things to be mad at their moms for.
2007-05-30 12:34:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
> "my daughter is pregnant returned." You daughter used up all your intense high quality after the 1st one, do not you think of! If she can not safeguard the 1st newborn, the place did she get the theory that it is not any "huge deal" if she has yet another one immediately? it somewhat is how cats and canines breed, in step with instinct and organic biology. precise now, i don't see plenty distinction. Her biology is outpacing her "uncomplicated experience" and adulthood. Do you think of you're permitting this subject in some way? i could propose you have a communicate with a number of the communities that do planned parenthood and get some suggestions and suggestion on a thank you to deal with to this. in the journey that your daughter's long selection plans are to stay "bare foot" and pregnant, why does she could desire to bypass returned to college? it is not any huge deal, grandma will huge up the slack! does not grandma have her own childrens to strengthen (or has raised)? i'm sorry it somewhat is selfish! another question, the place the hell is the daddy? different than being the sperm donor, what does he carry to this party?
2016-10-30 05:27:04 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd tell her that families come in all kinds of groups, and maybe talk to her about kids with blended families. Some of those kids who make fun of her "two moms" may have a bio-mom and a stepmom!
Tell her also that you love your partner the way men and women love each other.
I'd also think of enlisting the 14-year-old's help (did s/he get teased? How did s/he handle it?), and of course, talking to the principal and teacher about the bigger kids bullying her.
Finally, this site might help.
2007-05-30 12:05:46 · answer #4 · answered by GreenEyedLilo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her know why the kids are making fun of her "moms." Tell her that its nothing to be ashamed of and thet they were just brought up differently. And they anything that they say isn't true and that she should just ignore it or tell a teacher or counsilor. Oh, umm if this doesn't help keep in mind that this advise came from a gay 16 year old male. lol good luck.
2007-05-30 06:03:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
Just explain to her that kids are mean like that, but that great families come in all shapes and sizes. What matters is that there is love in the home. These kids who are making fun of your daughter probably don't have as much love in their home as you do or they wouldn't feel the need to act out like that. Clearly having heterosexual parents didn't help them any.
2007-05-30 12:11:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, go to the school and complain about the harassment your daughter is undergoing. If the school does nothing, threaten to sue. It's the same as race based or other types of harassment. Your daughter does not have to suffer this. Tell your daughter that it's not her or you that is in the wrong. It's the kids and their ignorant parents. Teach her to fight for her right to live in a safe harassment free world.
2007-05-30 06:21:06 · answer #7 · answered by Cordon Bleu 2 · 7⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her that your relationship with another woman is not accepted in every ones eyes, and tell her that having two moms is no where near wrong. Besides your little girl must love both of ya'll and she probably doesn't not care what mean people say at school. I hope that helps.
2007-05-30 06:08:50 · answer #8 · answered by Dark Knight 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
tell her the truth...honesty will always prevail. good luck...Maybe you can get some additional information from an Association like PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays)..while they are primarily for gay children coming out...they usually have good resources available to them.
2007-05-30 12:06:34 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
tell her that kids are immature and everybody gets teased at school for all different reasons because the kids that tease others are just insacure about themselves, if it wasn't this reason it would be something else. plus your kids are lucky to have two parents instead of one.
2007-05-30 06:06:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋