How should I answer when my BF asks if I would marry him?

Question

My boyfriend is currently going through his divorce but it will be finished soon and he has been separated for a long time. We have talked about getting married but I dont want to get engaged until after his divorce is final. He is always asking me, "Would you marry me?", "Would you allow me to marry you?", and "Do you still want to marry me?". Of course I will marry him, that's not the question, but I dont want to say "yes, I would marry you" until he is free and clear from his divorce. How should I answer him for now so he doesnt think I wont marry him? Is he asking me these questions because he wants to be sure about my feelings before he pops the question?

Answer 1

well i think you already know what to tell him lol I would tell him that after his divorce is final, that would be a good time to talk about it--but until that's all wrapped up i would tell him you feel that he needs to get one marriage over with before wanting to get into another---i would tell him i love him and its something you will be interested in but not until he is totally available....he should be able to understand that---if you love him and would like to be married to him sometime then let him know that's a very good possibility but you want to wait til its completely over and then discuss it----sounds like he loves you and you love him so waiting a little bit wont hurt your relationship at all--but if you really want to go for it i guess you could just tell him that you will but talk more in detail about it after the other issue it all over....which ever way you think wouldn't cause him to think that you wont marry him---hope this helps and good luck!

Answer 2

No, did you cause the break up with his ex soon to be wife? are you the reason why he left his marriage? this is a red flag and if he cheated on his wife, he will do the same to you. this guy doesn't have any respect for you or himself.

I'm not a moralist or purist or a religious freak, but a man should first end his marriage if that is what he wants but him or you should never engage in another relationship when he is not even legally divorce.

I know you are going to rationalize and probably get married to him anyway because love is blind, but remember that we told you so!

did you asked him why did his marriage failed? what's makes you think that it would be any different with you? why is he in a rush to get married? it sounds to me like he is not mature enough to be married and you should not even be dating him!

Answer 3

Hmm. i'm 25 and that i'm no longer waiting to get married. At sixteen years previous i'm able to very just about say for particular which you would be making a large mistake. you prefer time to do issues on your sensible trip the international, meet many diverse people, hire/very own a house and stay on your very own. carry a job. in all probability bypass to college. Fall out and in of love some situations. while i replaced into sixteen i assumed I had all of it found out. each and every little thing made experience and that i assumed i replaced into going to get married via 21 on the latest. I thank God usual of my existence that I in no way made that mistake. i'm typing this from a working laptop or pc in Korea real now and that i stay in Canada. i'm only on a trip and that i think of how no longer elementary or perhaps impossible this would have been for me if I had a relatives to assist with little ones and each little thing. do no longer make the blunders. i would not advise everyone get married until now 21 this present day and age.

Answer 4

I'd be leery of someone who was so hot to get married before the ink is even dry on the divorce decree!

But since you say you'll say yes after the divorce is over (and make sure it is!), then respond to his questions:
His question: "Would you marry me?"...your response, "We'll talk about it when your divorce is final."
His question: "Would you allow me to marry you?"...your response, "We'll talk about it when your divorce is final."
His question: "Do you still want to marry me?", your response "We'll talk about it when your divorce is final."

If he presses, tell him that while you know the two of you have talked about getting married, it really doesn't make any since to start planning a wedding until he's free to set a date.

Answer 5

You should do yourself a favor and say "no".

This guy has problems if he wants to get married right away. Your marriage will be headed for divorce as you are rebound girl. This in no way mean you are a bad catch, in fact you are probably a great one. However he is not right for you at this point in your life. He is damaged goods and needs time to fix himself. Jumping into another marriage right away will compound his problems dealing with women. You need a different guy...sorry but that is true.

Isn't the fact that he keeps asking about it a clue, or are you just so desperate to get married that you don't want to see it?

Answer 6

here my question.... why did he left his wife ??? what made you think that he wouldn't do that to you? what if he went out and find better girl..??? I won't want to be married until i know for sure that he loves me.. ya know what I mean???

I was married before and I left becasue she take control of my life and she want have a baby we can't we aurge all the time.... can't have baby...if this like this we divorce 8 months later...

I met this woman now 10 years and 3 kids and wow... we do have up and down way better than my ex.. and my wife her first married my is second. but I woldn't say second becasue we only been married 8 months.. countless..

So my wife told me how will I know you won't do that with your ex.. I explain what I said up there because I told her stright up that you way different than her.. and it true.. and thanks god she said yes...

But for you need to find out why what has happen what if he made up and you don't know what really who he is...?? Have you meet his ex wife?? if not How would you know?? things that need to be fix.. and Does he have kids with his ex?? if yes then bad idea because the ex will be in his life for long time.. if not thank god. smiling.

Answer 7

You have already answered your own question. In what you wrote you will find your answer. If you tell him exactly what you said "Of couse I will marry him, that's not the question, but I don't want to say "yes, I would marry you" until he is free and clear from his divorce." If he loves you he will accept and respect this answer.
Good Luck!

Answer 8

Say it the exact way you wrote it "Of course I will marry him, that's not the question, but I dont want to say "yes, I would marry you" until he is free and clear from his divorce."


best of luck!

Answer 9

You should not be dating a man who is still married. Sorry I can't help you I believe adultery is wrong. Why would you want to marry someone who does not respect the fact that he is still married. If he does not respect this marriage, he won't respect the next.

Answer 10

Say no. You two shouldn't have been even dating until the divorce is final! You have been "dating" a married man -- ewwww..... How will you explain that to your kids some day?