my husband told me im not that sexy&attractive anymore.i just keep in silence but it really hurts me?

Question

i gave birth last jan and im a breastfeeding mother.once there was a time that he saw my breast he told me that my breast sags....it really hurts me without his knowledge

Answer 1

tell him that hes an insensitive prick and that he sucks in bed....dont just let him treat you like sh!t and get away with it.

Answer 2

Communication is the key. If you want them to stop then TELL them. If you really don't care and it's not that big a deal and you enjoy their hurtful thoughts, words, or actions then just keep quiet about it. But then it also depends on what is hurting your feelings, since YOU have some responsibility in this too. If you are whining over prissy stuff then you might be setting yourself up for even more abuse. Basically if your request is a normal one that most other people would expect as well then go for it. But if people are going to think your whining is totally wussy then zip it. Good luck. You might tell Dr. YA what they said and why it bothers you so that a more detailed response can be formulated. :-) Peace y'all Merry Easter Happy Spring Planting DAy

Answer 3

I just gave birth 4 months ago and my breast sag a little. Put a little money to the side,and take yourself shopping. Buy a really sexy outfit and go to TJ Maxx and buy a minimizer bra(it gives your breast an illusion to look like they dont sag), and if you need to, buy a girdle and some hot heels. Fix your hair really nice get yourself together and get you a babysitter. Leave the house (while he sees you looking sexy) to go out without saying anything but,"I'll be back later on tonight". I promise this will make him lose his mind. And he'll regret that he said anything wrong about your body. If you really love him and plan to stay together, start working out when you can and keep looking sexy when you can and he'll lust you even more.

Answer 4

Ok Mom it is time to work on this situation and you can do it! Let him watch the baby and hit the high school track. Go to walmart and buy the body ball for tightening the tummy and and two 5 lb hand weights, and an aerobic video. All of these can be purchased at a low price. Go to your local library and get a book on the hand weights and there are exercises that will show you how to build the chest muscles back up! You do every excecise that you can for the breasts and if they still are a problem for him tell him to get over it or give you the money to pump them back up! Get yourself looking as good as ever and when you turn all the guys heads he will wish he had been quiet sweetie. This comment from my husband would give me a challenge and he would eat his words! Of course you do all of this because you want it for yourself and be sure you eat right and to. You will be the best looking mom on the block as you walk yuor beautifull baby in the stroller.It takes time sweetie to get back iin shape and you just had a baby. it will all come back ....just work an excercise program around your baby's shedule. Best wishes and take care.

Answer 5

Let him know how hurt you are and talk about it with him.
It can be hard for a lot of men when their partner has a child - they suddenly have to make that subconscious realignment of realising their partner is now not just a woman but a mother, and it can freak a lot of men out.
He might also see his move into fatherhood as a loss of his youth and be having a mini mid-life crisis where he measures his self-worth by the way his partner looks (ie, not like a mother!)
Its not uncommon for men to start sexually rejecting, or even resenting, the woman in their life after childbirth.
Unless you talk to him about it, it's not going to go away. If it gets worse, get counselling - talking it over with a third party can help.

Answer 6

Have you tried talking to him about it? One thing you don't want to do is keep it in. Talk with him about what he said. He needs to understand that your body changed because of having his child. Is that the only issue between you and him or is there something else??? Has your marriage been good before you had your baby? Or did you have your baby to try to make your marriage better? You really need to ask yourself these questions. If you have trouble talking with him one on one about how you feel then you should go talk to a marriage and family therapyst. Do this not only for you but for you, your husband, and your new child. They can help you find out if there are other issues that are bothering you.

Good luck

Answer 7

My wife had our third child a year ago and the baby was over 10 lbs. Needless to say my wife has some extra skin here and there, BUT I still find her very attractive and found her attractive with the extra 40lbs she had when 9 months pregnant.

I love my wife and every inch of her, all the stretch marks and extra skin and sags are from our three kids and that makes me love her even more!

Tell him to get over it or there are many other men out there that will find you attractive just the way you are!

Answer 8

I can't even begin to understand why your husband would say something like that to you. I would suggest that you tell him that you are really hurt by his statements and then ask him what he was hoping to accomplish by saying that to you. There is a reason behind his words and I hope he is honest with you when he answers that question. He didn't just say it to be talking and don't accept "I don't know" as an answer - tell him think about it until he can give you an answer.

Answer 9

The key here? "Without his knowledge". I'm surprised he isn't aware that comments like that are hurtful. Granted, we can be pretty thick headed when it comes to being aware of some things, but still - he should know that. If he doesn't though, them you need to tell him. Both of you need to be well aware of the others' feelings, emotions, interests, what hurts, what matters, etc. If he is not aware, and he hasn't figured it out on his own, he never will... unless someone (you) tell him.

Answer 10

Instead of feeling bad, why don't you do something about it? Clearly he is telling you this for just that reason, he loves you and wants to look at the person he married. Yes we all age, however we can also do something about it. Keep in mind that nature made men visually stimulated, and that he use to think you were really hot. You can't stop the aging, however you can get a boob job.

Answer 11

somtimes the truth hurts, hes not a jerk for telling it like it is, just because you were attractive to him at one time doesnt mean you always will be, i however think he is a lil quick on the draw if you just gave birth very recently, however woman do all they can to atract a man, keep their nails done their hair done, buy nice clothes and then they get married and get fat and become slobs and cry about how their man is a jerk for not finding them attractive