My husband wants me to have a baby (we´ve been married four years - I will be 30 in Oct) but I am really afraid of pregnancy. More than all, giving birth. It this normal?
2007-05-30 04:18:04 · 24 answers · asked by Moraima H 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Completely normal. It's an imposing journey but if you educate yourself as much as possible and consider using a doula (birth coach/assistant for you AND your husband) then the process will be much easier for you. It might help for you to watch some of the baby birth shows - while it isn't always the best example, it will give you an idea of what it might be like. I won't lie and say it isn't painful and confusing the first time - things seem to go by at 100 mph and to be honest you won't remember a lot of it. There are many ways to deal with pain - you just need to figure out which ones would be best for you.
I'm not sure what about labor scares you but I'd be more than willing to chat with you to get your questions answered and concerns addressed. I personally don't feel one should start conceiving until they're as comfortable as possible with the impending process. Sure there is the possibility of complications but it's no different than the rest of life. Everything we do is taking a chance. If we never took chances then we'd all be at home sitting on the couch - my point is to get comfortable with the process and educate yourself so you're as prepared as you can be and if you think you're ready (your husband obviously is) then go for it!
Let me know if I can do anything at all to help you and good luck!
2007-05-30 05:03:52 · answer #1 · answered by thejezowskis 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's a big thing, the experience of pregnancy, birth and bringing up a child. You are bound to feel nervous. It will change your life forever! But it will also be the most amazing experience ever!! If you want children then don't put it off too long because of nerves, just go for it. Once you find your self pregnant you will meet other first timers and soon realize that there isn't anything to be really scared of, it's the most natural thing in the world. Your body was custom built to carry and deliver a baby. As for birth, well if it was that bad people wouldn't keep doing it over and over again. I hope you manage to get over these fears and step onto the ladder of parenthood, you will never look back. Good luck x
2007-05-30 04:26:51 · answer #2 · answered by michelle w 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes very normal til you've had your own experience. Nothing can prepare you for that event although good advice so you know round about what to expect will give a slight clue. If your reasonably healthy and happy then I should'nt think there will be anything to be concerned about. Read lot's so the process is all sorted in your mind. My first baby was terrifying at just 18yrs old, but went back three more times. All trouble free, my last being at 39yrs. You like the rest of us that have gone b4 u, will soon forget the pain when they hand u the lil pink bundle to love and cherish. All the best.
2007-05-30 04:38:49 · answer #3 · answered by Ms CMP5260 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is normal. I just had my first at 24 after being married for a year. We wanted kids but did not think it would happen that fast. It is an amazing thing knowing this little person is growing and thriving inside of you. Seeing him grow (your belly size lol) day to day, and then hearing the heartbeat for the first time and the first kick...there is just nothing like it. Right now having my son with me for these 12 weeks I could not imagine my life without him...it is just so different now and it is great. It is a nice feeling having this person who is so dependent on you and immediately loves you even though he does not really even know what love is. Being able to teach him different things every day....and getting those big toothless drooly smiles in return is totally worth it!!! Birth was scary...just because you do not know really what to expect, but once you are there pushing and all you are just so anxious to meet your son/daughter that you really forget everything else all the pain. Hope this helps and good luck with your decision.
2007-05-30 04:37:51 · answer #4 · answered by bpfashion123 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Completely normal! I was terrified when I found out I was pregnant, even though it was planned. I started shaking and couldn't stop. I think it's normal to be afraid because until you have been pregnant you can't imagine all the changes your body will go through and how it will feel. And giving birth, well, who wouldn't be scared?
But it's really not as scary as it seems. I used to think I would never be able to be pregnant because just thinking about it freaked me out a lot. Once you are pregnant though it changes, and by the time you are ready to give birth it doesn't seem so scary. If I could do it you can too!
2007-05-30 04:24:22 · answer #5 · answered by Kathie L 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, very normal. I'm 23 wks prego today. It wasn't planned or anything & in the very beginning that's what I kept on thinking bout. That's one reason why I decided that I didn't wanna have kids in the 1st place even. You get used to the fact of being prego... :) Maybe you just needa educate yourself on preg. There are lots of prego books & resources on the net. You don't have to do it alone. There's lots of support out there. Find your supports in the community. There's your Dr, public health nurse, home visitor possibly, (I have one come visit me once a wk, if I wanted I could have her come once every 2 wks but since I want more support she's willing to come once a wk :) ), Btw, this all varies on where you live & your living circumstance. Also if you're on income assistance you can get help financially. I go to this mtg that's held monthly & I learn new things. After the baby's born you can get Child Tax, your fam &/or friends can put a baby shower on for you too.Also, there may be a parenting class in your area where they teach bout discipline & other things. I plan on taking lamaze classes too. Try to find these resources in your area. Maybe you should talk to your Dr. & tell him/her that you're considering pregnancy. Someone online told me that they can't imagine NOT having kids. I'm nervous too. Don't forget that your husband will be there to support you too :)
2007-05-30 04:29:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
being afraid of pregnancy and birth is completly normal especially for first time mothers. Im 23 weeks with my first baby and for the first couple months i was scared to death about the pain if i would be able to lose weight after the birth and numorus other worries. now that i'm almost in my 3rd i know that my body was made for this and though it will be hard I KNOW i can get through it with a beautiful baby girl. please dont pass up the chance of having a baby. yes the pregnancy is hard and so is the birth but what you get for all your misery you get somthing that makes up for everything you go through. good luck! -Ams
2007-05-30 04:30:10 · answer #7 · answered by Ams 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I waited 5 years to have a baby and we were thrilled when we found out we were having one.....then I realized that baby was going to have to come out!!!! YOWSERS! Yes, it's scary!
Most of the time, your pregnancy will be just fine. You might encounter some morning sickness (that can occur at any time of the day), swelling in your feet and ankles (last month or so), extra weight gain, stretch marks.....
I had 2 c-sections and the recovery took about 8 weeks. It's hard to get out of bed and you are very sore.
BUT, no matter what you go through, you get a wonderful blessing in 40 weeks and it's worth every bit of discomfort. And honestly, time will go by quickly and after the baby comes, you won't even remember throwing up everytime you brushed your teeth!!!
2007-05-30 04:24:14 · answer #8 · answered by steffers27 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is perfectly normal to be afraid of pregnancy and delivery. I was nervous the first time I got pregnant and when the due date grew closer I became scared of the delivery. These are normal reactions for some women. I was afraid of the pain (I do not tolerate it well) of the delivery. Talk your feelings over with your husband and let him know how you feel. Don't panic and don't feel like you are a freak because you are scared or nervous.
2007-05-30 04:25:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Of course it's normal. Pregnancy can be a very scary thing, especially if you've never experienced it. And don't even get me started about what it's like to be pregnant for the first time and realize that that baby has to come out.
What you have to do is ask yourself if you want to be ruled by fear? Do you want to miss out on having a child of your own just because of something in your head. I am trying to teach my daughters that while it's okay to be afraid, it is no way to live your life. Really, millions of women every day get pregnant and it's just fine. If you want a baby, go for it. Who knows, maybe you'll be one of those women who ends up loving being pregnant.
2007-05-30 04:23:22 · answer #10 · answered by Sharon M 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋