Alright I think that I am a very sweet and pretty girl. I do have a problem with voicing my opinion to people which is one of my biggest down falls but anyways my husband and I will be married for 5 years this coming friday and I have been having serious doubts about our relationship for a long time now.... I never hear I love you or even see him for more than 5 hours a week... he is always working or hanging out with his buddies. I dont like his friends so dont tell me to hang out with him... I get tired of being the good little house wife that stays at home and cooks and cleans all the time.. one of the biggest problems is with his step daughters mom... she calls here stoned off her *** and i told her she needed to grow up and be a mom she was to old for that crap and he calls me a ***** telling me that i need to control my mouth cause all it does is cause problems between them and the sad thing is they dont even deal with each other i do it all.... i need advice please anything
2007-05-30 03:26:06 · 20 answers · asked by dawniebear22 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
by the way my husband will not deal with his ex wife at all so dont tell me to stay out of it that child is to important to me to see her get hurt cause her mom is stupid.
2007-05-30 03:30:00 · update #1
we have no kids i dont want any either not that i dont like them they just arent for me right now
2007-05-30 03:36:09 · update #2
i know i have told you time and time again my opinion on this and you really do need to kick him to the curb or at least find some help if you really love him you need to find out if he is just using you i love you sis and i will be here for you always.
2007-05-30 17:21:41 · answer #1 · answered by The brat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it sounds like maybe your husband needs to grow up a little. He's still hanging out with his friends most of the time rather than acting like he's a married man now with adult responsibilities. It's okay to hang out with friends, but not exclusively. Getting away from the buddy scene can be very tricky. You can't ask him to give up friends completely, you need to ask him to spend more time with you and engage in other kinds of activities with you.
I'm not sure why his step daughter's mother would be hanging around. However, if she his real daughter, then you are stuck with her as long as you are married to him. Be nice, but stand your ground. Don't let her speak to you in a demeaning way and don't yell at her. You said you told her to "grow up", but I don't think that's the way to help someone behave better towards you. Don't let what she says get to you. Stick to the point anytime she calls. In other words, make sure that the conversation always stays on the daughter. Is she picking up the daughter? Is the daughter okay? Child support check already mailed. Etc.
Good luck.
2007-05-30 10:43:10 · answer #2 · answered by Lidya D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should really re-evaluate whether this where you want to be or not. As of right now, if sounds to me like you are very frustrated and are not very happy. You have been with him 5 years, but if you don't think you see any improvment for the future, maybe you should get out now before it gets worse. I don't know if you have already talked to him about how your are feeling (I'm assuming so since you have been married for awhile), but the last thing you want to do is spend the rest of your life unhappy. Do what is best for you because you still have the rest of your life to be happy. Really sit down and think about it. List the pros and cons, go out with your friends and if he complains, oh well because you deserve to have some fun too! I hope everything works out for you--but if you don't see this getting any better, then maybe you should break away from it and move on with a better and happier lifestyle! Good luck!
2007-05-30 10:34:24 · answer #3 · answered by HBomb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you could only hear the noise of horror I just made when I was reading your question. Your letting him walk all over you. I couldn't even imagine how you've never said anything, thrown all of his **** out of the house, changed the locks. You are WAY to nice and he knows it and is taking advantage of it. So his whore x keeping calling the house while she's on crack. Jerry Springer anyone? jesus christ, the answer is divorce. Run, don't walk to the nearest lawyer and get the hell outta there. Do you really enjoy being miserable everyday, I don't think so. I would move out, tell your husband to **** off and get a divorce. That is honest to God what I would do, exactly.
2007-05-30 10:31:56 · answer #4 · answered by Jersey Style 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should start by going and try to get some help from a psychologist / councilor it sound like there are some deep rooted issues going on and you need to seek the advice from a professional. I have been there and done that it really helps you sort things out. After all it is your life and it is too short to live with this sort of thing.
2007-05-30 10:33:42 · answer #5 · answered by workoutman_2001 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are working very hard to try to be the best you can be. What does he think of the marriage? I think he is actually the one that has the issue, otherwise he would be around more. Often times being gone...over working, spending lots of time with friends, is done to escape home life. The big question is why.
2007-05-30 10:31:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow...ok. Since this sounds like it's been going on for a long time now and you've been married awhile, it's time to put your foot down and VOICE your opinion. He probably thinks he can do what he wants to do because he KNOWS you won't say anything. To have this situation changed, you're going to have to say something or do something whether he likes it or not. It might also change his tune and give you the respect you deserve. Now, if you don't say or do anything, then you unfortunately deserve to be in the situation, you know?
2007-05-30 10:30:27 · answer #7 · answered by suzlaa1971 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well I'm glad you don't want kids, cause this sounds like a terrible situation to bring up another kid in!!
Your husband needs to take responsibility of his own daughter and the time he spends with her. Ask his ex, I bet she left him for the very reasons you mention here. You got a winner!!!
2007-05-30 11:21:29 · answer #8 · answered by jonesk_92656 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say give him a dose of his own medicine, I'm telling u from exp. that he wont like it at all. As for the ex. I wouldn't say a word too the ex. let her learn on her own, when the child gets older he will remember everything that has happened to him. I say too u just be a friend and a good roll model for your step son. Good luck.
2007-05-30 10:36:42 · answer #9 · answered by bdgizzy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is hard to voice your opinion, even harder when you do people don't like it, fortunatley for you this is ssomething that your hubby needs to deal with, he should respect you and your opinions, freedom of speech is your fundermental right.
men hate women having opinions, they are scared as our opinions generally make ,more sense than theres.
you need to make one night a week/fortnight to do something together don't let him get out of it, if you spend that quality time alone away from home you will know whether the relationship is worth saving, try it for three months then make a decission.
2007-05-30 10:36:32 · answer #10 · answered by lost Angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don' t you know that you shouldn't come between people when they are fighting......Don't you know that you will be the one who gets hit - Not them......They are both beating you up- You need to walk away from this situation Fast......
Never be the go between.....For Anybody.....
I am not saying leave the marriage just the situation.....if you do this the child will see how stupid both parents are......and you will both grow stronger towards each other.
2007-05-30 10:36:55 · answer #11 · answered by Been There Done That 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋