Since I joined this site, I've answered a lot of question concerning the infidelity of their husband, most of it are so sad. That's why Im wondering why some married men are willing to give their affection to the woman that they never even knew that well, instead of their own wife?
Let's not talk about maybe his not getting it from home,, or maybe their having a problem.
Reality check here, I think it doesn't matter if a couples are having a problem about their realtionship,it doesn't give no rights for married men just to find another woman( married or single),just to throw away what they had for years .
And if things didn't work out with the other woman,
1) Why go back??
2) Why hurt your partner or the kids in the process?
Guys let's be polite answering this question please! No judging or think that this is me who's having this issue, I thank you!!
2007-05-28 07:27:09 · 16 answers · asked by islandgirl06 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
guess what i am the other woman......he is not married by law but had 3 kids with the woman of 20 years....had 1 more kid outside of that relationship for the last 4 years but still stays with the first family because he doesn't want to hurt them... i stuck with him because his first line was it wasn't working out and he wasn't getting none. SO Sad but true.... finally he says he was pressured to wear a wedding ring after 20 years and now i am pregnant with his 5 th kid...when i first found out i was pregnant i said no way he could let this happen but sure enough he tied both of us down.
2007-05-28 07:51:44 · answer #1 · answered by bazookabubble gum 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
What you are referring to is sort of a reality check, grasp at life or past prime crisis. It usually occurs in men and sometimes women around the age of 50 give or take a few years.
The children are grown and the empty nest syndrome has set in.
The advancement potential for the man has ceased to exist.
The wife has pretty much let herself go to pot and doesn't try to make any kind of an impression on the husband.
Evenings at home are watch TV for a while then go to bed, probably separate bedrooms because the husband snores.
Husband and wife basically quit communicating.
Young lady comes along, flatters elderly gentlemen, makes him feel like he is something besides a has been and he enjoys himself again. Wife wonders why.
Where does the fault lie? Is it the husband? Is it the wife? Is it our changing culture? Couples living together without marriage and having children? Everyone just does their own thing and well it seems to be all right.
2007-05-28 12:12:59 · answer #2 · answered by don n 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't necessarily think ALL men will cheat. It depends on each relationship and the individuals involved. I saw a question on here last week where the MAN never wanted to have sex with his wife and they hadn't even gotten married yet. Don't think he would be the one doing the cheating in THAT relationship. ha ha All I want from a wife is to ride me like the Pony Express and do it with love and affection. An inflatable doll is a lot cheaper and at least IT won't complain all the way through it. Attitude is 80%; performance 20%.
2016-04-01 01:10:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I do believe most men will want to cheat because they are not "getting it" at home. If men want to be intimate with their wife that is a sign he probably feels comfortable with her and that is his way of getting closer. Men have to be physical. If a wife thinks she is being wise withholding intimacy in bed she is very mistaken. She will only create distance in the relationship and the man will be looking elsewhere. He may not do anything for a while but if/when he does become intimate with another woman it is probably the first step before actually going through with the divorce. The worst thing a woman can do is use sex as a weapon. This does not apply to abusive, controlling men because they will do it any way.
2007-05-28 07:42:18 · answer #4 · answered by Rmalko 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What a panic. You judge all over hell and creation then you demand that others not judge. You attempt to tell people what they can and can't talk about. In other words you only want to hear what you want to hear. And the world doesn't work that way.
Try taking some of your own medicine before you attempt to force it onto others. As you would say - "reality check here."
Okay, now on to your question. Cheating is wrong. But why are married men willing to give affection to another woman? Exactly for the reason you say it can't be!
Men who cheat are selfish, lying trust breakers. But they *perceive* their wives as being distant and lacking affection - or they actually *are* distant and lacking affection. Reasons be damned. Real or imagined, these men take it personally. They try, often for years, to solve the affection problem.
That still doesn't make it right to cheat, but it *justifies* it in their minds.
Whether you like it as the reason or not.
As for your last 2 questions - they stay with their wives because it is the path of least resistance and they are often terrified of conflict. These men lack a backbone or they would've spoken up *before* they started cheating to end things with their wives. They are cowards in that respect and haven't the courage to face their fears or confront their wives with their true desires.
That's as polite as it can be for someone who sets up all the goofy rules you tried to set up in your "question".
2007-05-28 07:47:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The reason that some married men or married women give affection to other people instead of their spouse comes down to them being selfish and thinking ONLY of themselves. And the reason that some guys go back, is because they believe that everything will be ok with their wife.
And the reason that they hurt their spouse or kids in the process is because they are not thinking of them or their feelings. They are thinking ONLY of themselves.
2007-05-28 07:33:51 · answer #6 · answered by Bryan M 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Guys, if they don't know why they're married, will start to get bored. Some guys think marriage is just for sex, so once they get tired of the sex, they'll start to think the grass is greener on the other side and want to have sex with another women. Also the sex drive for men is really strong, and if the women is not talking care of her man in that area he might stray.
2007-05-28 07:30:12 · answer #7 · answered by yaabro 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't want to talk about what very well may be the problem? Mostly because the relationship got stale and he wants more of what the wife gave him early in the marriage. Plus men seem to think it's their right to pursue other women for sex and companionship that the wife may no longer give. That's reality - whether you like it or not.
2007-05-28 07:38:23 · answer #8 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm not a guy but I guess alot of the problem was they rushed into the marriage to quick and were not grew up enough to know that this person was not there soulmate in the first place. That is a pretty strong bond that two people have and if you dont have it sometimes anything less is not enough.
2007-05-28 07:31:54 · answer #9 · answered by jeannie f 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why I refuuuse to get married....men start to take for granted that you will allllways be there...so they get BORED. They need to always think that you will be out the door in a heartbeat for them to act correctly IMHO.
TRUE STATISTIC: 62% of ALL depressed people in the US are MARRIED WOMEN, coming in second is single men. Then Single women and the least of all clinically depressed people studied MARRIED men.
Its called having your cake and eating it too.
2007-05-28 08:50:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋