so my boyfriend and i have been together for almost 2 years and we have lived together for about 6 months. We fight about money because he works for his family and doesnt get paid often or nearly enough. I say he should break off working for his family (like he only got 2,000 total for the last 6 months, when he works everyday)... and work for someone else. Whenever we fight about this, or anything, he says 'well you deserve better im sorry to lose you, but you should have more'. So he basically breaks up with me, every fight we have. I think he wants a reaction from me because I always freak out after he does this. Ive tried talking to him about this and also just ignoring him when he causes more drama than necessary. HELP! what can I do! It makes me so stressed I dont want to bring up anything that bothers me becuase I know it will result in him just blowing up and trying to break it off. He does love me and is committed (or so he says), but I need him to stoP this behavior!
2007-05-27 19:51:08 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Well i guess you can't stop your boyfriend from working for his family.I can see that he really wanted to help his family and that i guess he's the only one his family can count on.Your boyfriend really loves you but all he's asking from you right now is to understand him.His focus of attention right now is his family so i suggest that try to understand him and support him for what he is doing for his family and he will love you more for that.If the time comes that his family will be stable then theres no need for you to brag about that and all of his attention will be yours and you won't fight about his family anymore.
2007-05-27 20:09:33 · answer #1 · answered by pinky 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My last relationship was something like that I mean we were constantly fighting but it was me telling him it was over in almost every fight... the truth is I wasnt really happy I couldnt see it then but I see it now..... He eventually broke up with me got tired of the fighting I suppose and moved on with in a week of our breaking up it hurt and I wished I would have been different but I wanst as happy as i should have been I also had cheated on him several times I never slept with anyone else but did what I thought was cheating maybe me trying to break up with him was a guilt I had I dont know but being on the otherside maybe he isnt happy like he used to be maybe he is waiting on you to call it off..... and if you ask if hes happy hell say yes so I wouldnt try that but did the fighting start directly or a bit later after yall moved into together cause maybe he realized something..... its really hard to say .....
2007-05-27 19:59:21 · answer #2 · answered by Lostandconfussed 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are in a live-in entanglement that is not necessarily, a committed relationship. Your boyfriend is comfortable working for his family because it was the amount of money he needed, before you, to take care of his own needs. If you were previously, able to take care of your own financial needs before moving in with him, you are going to have to start taking care of yourself again and to stop depending on him to do it because he has not make any promises to care for you and your needs. Go back to work and move out until you get a better offer because he does not sound like he is going to make any changes to accommodate your wishes at this point in time.
2007-05-27 20:01:48 · answer #3 · answered by Jess4rsake 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You either have to accept him the way he is (which I don't think is working for you), or you can take a risk by walking out on him the next time he tries to break up with you. That way he will see that you are serious, and if he cares enough (or is man enough), he will take you back, and break away from his family.
2007-05-27 19:57:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he loves you an is committed to you then his actions will show it.
So far, you havent seen him ; show it.
He makes no money and breaks up with you like he is changing a dirty shirt.
Listen to him and move on.
He might be right, do you think you deserve better?
If so get him to find a new address.
2007-05-27 19:57:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In some families, the children are expected to work in the family business. It appears that you will either have to accept it, or (my suggestion) leave him. "Blood is thick than water." You can make him do anything that he does not want to do. He may have other reasons, that you are unaware of, for doing what he is doing.
2007-05-27 19:57:26 · answer #6 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is giving you an "out". It is his defense mechanismn. He is torn between his loyalty to his family, and to you. You cant ask him to leave this job. You can, however, be supportive and look for alternative money stragigies. You are going to have to stop pressuring him. He is NOT going to quit, and if he did, he would end up resenting you in the end. Good luck!
2007-05-27 19:56:34 · answer #7 · answered by termcd4 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st: 3 deep breaths
2nd: Get rid of this bully. Fast.
3rd: He will never change. He is too comfy. You make it so.
4th: see #2
2007-05-27 20:02:34 · answer #8 · answered by d_cider1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
from the sounds of it he is a really concieted guy and if u want him to respect u tell him how much u love him and tell him off stop letting him treat u like that and if he doesnt change dump him i noe it doesnt sound easy but its that or get walked all over on
2016-04-01 00:25:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to go eat some raw chicken!
2007-05-27 19:53:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋