Okay my mom made an appointment and I'm really really nervous...?

Question

I'm 17 and my mom made an appointment for me at the gynocologist because I've had a lot of pain 'down south'... I'm not sure what to expect and I'm really nervous and a little..who am I kidding...a whole lot scared. Nobody's ever seen me down there since I could bathe and use the restroom by myself... And I'm also scared of using tampons... I just do not feel comfortable with this... I'm like freaking out to the point I feel I might start hyperventilating (sp?) while I'm at the doctor... I don't know if words can describe how scared I am... IS THIS NORMAL??? OR AM I JUST....WEIRD???

And no, I'm not sexually active...Hello! I don't even like TAMPONS

Answer 1

Okay, I am going to tell you about it, because knowing about it makes it a lot less scary. I was absolutely terrified the first time I went in for a GYN exam, so I know how you feel. Luckily, I had a real honey of a sweet man for a doctor, and he told me everything he was going to do before he did anything.

My husband just noticed me writing a super long answer, and suggested I find a site with all the information, instead, so I found a good link for you:

http://www.mckinley.uiuc.edu/handouts/gynecological_exam/gynecological_exam.html

It hits all the important parts, and there's just a few things I want to add.

The first one is make sure you know the first day of your last period. While you are not sexually active, that is still important information for the doctor, as he or she will need to determine what kind of cycles you are having.

The second one is that you can have a nurse in the room with you for moral support and for peace of mind. I know some girls who have their moms with them, but when I had my first exam at 17, I really did not want my mom in there. My doctor, who was a really wonderful man, told me that we would have a nurse there so that I had a hand to hold, and moral support, and also so I could know he wasn't doing anything inappropriate. He told me that he always told young girls that if ever there is a question, and you don't feel comfortable for some reason, you should immediately ask for the exam to stop until a nurse can be present with you. He stressed that that is our right as women. Once you know what is and what is not supposed to happen in an exam, you may feel more comfortable without a nurse, but I have always requested a nurse when seeing a new doctor--it just makes me feel better about things. Just remember that is your right, not a luxury, and you can always ask for one if you want one.

The speculum shouldn't pinch if it is inserted correctly, but they can catch you and you should tell the doctor. A respectful doctor will remove it and reinsert it. (I had a pig of a doc one time who told me to "grow up--it's only for a few minutes." I never went back to him again.)

Relaxation is key, and the exam will be a lot less uncomfortable if you are able to relax. A good doctor will, when you ask for a breather, give you a few minutes to deep breathe and relax so it isn't so uncomfortable.

Some doctors, but not all, also include a quick rectal exam at the end. Your doctor will tell you if he or she plans to do one, but don't be surprised at it if it's part of their regular exam. Since it already feels like a whole Hollywood film crew has looked at your insides, the rectal exam isn't too terribly bad. I just wanted to let you know it is a possibility.

I won't lie to you--a pelvic isn't pleasant by any means. But having one regularly is really important to female health, and that's especially the case when you are having something like a lot of pain. And here's a secret--after it's done, you will feel a tremendous feeling of relief, and if you're at all like me, you will feel proud of yourself for making it through in one piece.

Oh, and one other thing. While it's true that no one else has seen your privates since you were a little girl, GYNs see them every day. I know that's a concern for a lot of women, but I actually asked my GYN about it once, and she told me with a straight face that when you've seen one, you've pretty much seen them all. So remember that while it's a big deal to you for someone to see an intimate part of your body, for the doc it's just another day in gynecologist land.

I wish you the very best. Try and relax, and remember that it's a pretty quick thing. After it's over, treat yourself to something small like a nice bottle of lotion or an ice cream cone, because you will have earned it ;)

Be well,
Bronwen

Answer 2

It's normal to be nervous and scared when having this done for the first time, but let your mom know how you are feeling right now and that you would like to talk to the dr in plainclothing first before any kind of exam is done. Also, let the dr know how this makes you feel. A really good dr will try to help you relax and will explain everything as they do it.

When it comes to the exam part (when ready of course) they will insert a special kind of instrument called a speculum which looks like the bill of a duck that gets inserted in to your vagina. They will also put a light thru so that they can see what's going on and check to see if there's an infection or something else going on.

They will also check the size and shape of your organs to make sure there is no abnormalities from that point as well as make sure there are no masses there.

If they do a pap smear (the screening test to make sure the woman doesn't have cervical cancer) the dr will take a special brush to get some of the cells from your cervix. They then take these cells to put on a slide that then gets sent to a lab for analysis. The results come back in about two weeks. If you notice some spotting after this test that is normal for a couple of days because of the irritation being caused by the brush.

If anything hurts you can ask the dr to stop. If it hurts it's either because of the following:

1. Being tense (understandable when being nervous but try to relax)
2. Dr being too rough (you can ask them to stop)
3. Something wrong such as an infection (infections such as with the cervix can cause pain)

But please let your mom know how this makes you feel.

Also, if you have additional questions for me please feel free to e-mail or IM me directly off the board.

Answer 3

Very normal. Has your mom told the Dr. that this is your 1st time? She needs to do that so they understand and take the time to tell you what they are doing. I know this is gross but the first exam I had the Dr. had a hand mirror and let me hold it and watch everything she was doing. This really helped my nerves. Don't worry though. It doesn't hurt. It is always embarrassing, no matter how old or experienced you are. It is just something you do every year and then put it out of your head until next yr. Don't think about them seeing your privates that is what they do for a living and they see it all day.

Answer 4

I am not sure why your mom feels you need to see a GYN doc when your regular doc can handle this. It will be fine. They will take your temp and blood pressure just like in the normal docs office and ask you why you are here etc. They will ask when your last period was and if you are sexually active. Be honest about everything as they are only there to help you. Once the nurse is done with pre-exam stuff she will have you undress from the waist down and sit on the table with a sheet over your legs. WHen the doc comes in he/she will greet you and look at why you are here and ask you about it. The doc will have you lay down and with a gloved hand do a pelvic exam where they insert a finger into your vagina and press on your stomach with the other hand to check your female organs. This DOES NOT HURT. He may insert a speculum which is a plastic device to help hold your vagina open. Again this does NOT HURT. After looking inside he will let you know if he needs to take any cultures aka swabs of your vagina............AGAIN THIS DOES NOT HURT. Once he has done this he will remove the speculum and you will probably be done except for the doc telling you what if anything he thinks might be wrong etc. DO not feel embarassed by any of this as the doc is only there to help you. He went to school to help people just like you and is only doing his job. He has seen it all before and heard it all before. Anything he sees or you say will not be new for him. Also the term is vagina not "down south". You need to relax and learn to use the proper terms for your body parts. Be sure to let the nurse and the doc know that you are very nervous when you get there if you are still nervous even after reading this reply. IF ANYTHING FEELS uncomfortable or painful you must tell the doc as nothing should hurt.

Answer 5

I was the same way. Well I just went in my first Pap and I had made several appointments and kept cancelling them, but then when I was in their for something else my Dr. talked me into it. I've only had sex with my bf but even he hasn't seen me that naked..especially under such lights! I almost cried while it was happening. But my Dr was really nice and she made it as quick as she could. And it did hurt a little when they put the thing in you that opens you and when they scrape you..but it's quick. As mortified as I was I was sooo h appy when it was done and I was glad I did it. Your health is important. I'm not gonna tell you not to worry cause that won't help. but jus think how good it will feel when you are done. Good luck hun!

Answer 6

Yes it is normal to be nervous so don't feel bad. Just tell them that your scared and they will try to help calm you down. Don't worry about them seeing anything, their used to it. They feel no different than you would looking at someone else's face. I've had 2 teenage girls and they had to go for certain reasons and were even younger than you. It wasn't as bad as they thought it would be. Gynocologist are specially trained and your mom could probably be with you if you would feel more at ease.

Answer 7

calm down, no matter how scared you may be it's better to check out what's wrong with you than just leave it be and take the chance of it getting worse, it won't be as bad as you think, if you get a woman doctor to do the procedures whatever they may be, don't be scared, it probably won't be the first time she's seen a girl down there especially since she's nurse/doctor, and she's got the same anatomy as you...i'm not sure what they'll do but don't be scared, i'm sure everything will be fine, just take a deep breath and try to think of things that would calm you down...i wish you luck...hope nothing's seriously wrong...

Answer 8

http://www.healthisnumberone.net/libgynfirst.htm

This will help, it's perfectly normal to be nervous. Really, there is a HUGE stigma associated with genitalia being a very, very private part of your body for so long, then WHAM! you're expected to be okay with some stranger poking around your kit n' kaboodle. It's normal. You will be fine.

Answer 9

Ok, first of all, if you are in that much pain, you really need to see the doctor. I think that you already know that. The first time seeing a gynocologist is never easy and it will be a little uncomfortable. The doctor will explain what you need to do, and it will only take about five minutes once your all set up. Don't worry so much! Most of us women have gone through it and survived. You will too hun. Hang in there, it will be over with before you know it.

Answer 10

First of all, at your age, a pap smear is a good idea. It is totally normal to be nervous about a doctor looking at what you have been taught since you were a toddler is "private".
You can
ask for a female doctor
ask for your mom to stay in there
and the nurse will be there too.
Are you aware the doctor will drape you so you don't feel so exposed.
You know how to use to Internet, go on line to Web MD and type in pelvic exam and it will help you.
Welcome to the world of growing up sweetie!