Ways to tell you are getting old.?

Question

I have some ideas. When pulling out gray hair leaves bald spots, when teenagers call you ma'am or sir, when 20 year olds call you ma'am or sir, when you look at your "laugh lines" and realize that nothing was ever THAT dam*** funny compared to the size of the lines, when you have more lines than a road map, when you don't have to ask anymore what age spots are, when you call a 30 year old a kid, when you stop noticing vericose veins on your moms legs and start noticing them on your own legs, when you say, 50 isn't old! Y'all have any?

But ahcrickets, you answered huh?

Answer 1

You know you're getting old when it takes 3 tries to get up off the couch.
When your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.
When your hubby says, "Let's go upstairs and make love" and you answer, "Honey, I can't do both!"
You're suffering from Mallzheimer's disease. You go to the mall and forget where you parked your car.
You have more patience; but actually, it's just that you don't care any more.
Your joints are more accurate than the National Weather Service.
You begin every other sentence with, "Nowadays..."
Your childhood toys are now in a museum.
You're asleep, but others worry that you're dead.
Your best friend is dating someone half their age and isn't breaking any laws.
Your ears are hairier than your head.
Your children are beginning to look middle-aged.
"Getting a little action" means you don't need to take a laxative.

I can crack the jokes because I'm old enough to experience them!!!!!

Answer 2

thinking that kids shouldn't be watching "American Idol" listening to Pop music, they should be starting their own garage bands. With 20, 30, 90 channels on TV and you hate all of them. Watching Andy of Mayberry, Leave it to Beaver, The Munsters and thinking why the he-- do people want to watch "Desperate Housewives" or "Road Rules"?. There is enough deceit and greed in the world without watching it intentionally performed on TV. Why are a bunch of cunning backstabbers on a pretend survival show considered fun???


Yes I am old, thank God, what passes for youth can be so disgusting

Answer 3

How about when you find muscles you didn't know you had because they hurt

When you jump out of bed and your feet double under you because the artritis has tightened up so much you can't walk first thing in the morning.

When you find out that it's not just the hair on your head that turns grey.

When you look at a young person and can't tell if its a boy or a girl.

Answer 4

When you decide to avoid a bar or club because it is packed -- rather than decide you must attend it because it is "in" (and thus miserably packed).

When people you know stop drinking because their livers are swollen.

When you ask your barber to trim your eyebrows -- and you are female.

When you are surprised (but not offended) when someone refers to you as "still young"

When you notice your friends have gained wrinkles around their eyes and mouth -- and you know they are noticing the same of you

Answer 5

Your teeth are like the stars - they come out at night.
You can wear your bras as knee warmers.
You sit in front of your washing machine and make comments about the bad tv program.

Answer 6

The main difference is energy level. Weight gain is natural as you age too. Emotionally, I think realizing the universe doesn't revolve around you.

Answer 7

I noticed it when things I buyed and relied on started to disappear. As in they don't make it anymore. I loooove the meatball sandwich at Quizno's -- discontinued. I like Thermasilk heat activated shampoo and conditioner -- discontinued. I mention this to my mother in law she said " It only gets worse and that's when you know your getting old". When they start discontinuing things you buy all the time.

Answer 8

When a beautiful woman is an object of art but way to much hassle to sleep with.
The themes of books and movies are all repeats.

Answer 9

When you have stopped keeping up with the current music because you can't idnetify with it anymore (and becuase you think it's crap).

You start saying things your parents used to say (What is that crap? and Damn kids...)

You like quiet.

You take more naps.

Answer 10

Start asking your kids to do things for you

Piling on the weight

medical complaints start and escalate