If some father stops his daughter from further studies & pressurise her to get married...see details.?

Question

If 'some' father wants daughter(26) to get married to a guy and don't want her to study more, pressurise her for it, spends money to buy expensive items for another sibling BUT don't give her a singal penny for filling entrance exam form,to get petrol filled in her vehical,for books, misbehaves,shouts aloud and slaps her,says'' get out of my house!''.It becoms so embrassing,seems like either get married or no way is there to live.
If she is 26 yr old why can't she get married at 29 after studies to 29-30 yr old guy?why so much to worry?
*No! in her custom ladies are not allowed to study after marriage and that can't be changed.*
For bank finances,I think they don't finance entrance exams or petrol of vehical or daily expenses.What if she want to give entrance exam first?
CAN'T SOME MAGISTRATE ORDER THIS KIND OF FATHER TO BEHAVE PROPERLY WITH HER DAUGHTER and help her for further studies as he is RICH & CAPABLE enough to do that?
Isn't it DOMESTIC VIOLENCE kind of in India?advise.

Answer 1

Although I have answered this question previously but here you have raised the question whether such an act of a father not allowing his daughter to further continue her studies amounts to domestic violence under the The Protection Of Women From Domestic Violence Act, 2005 or not. Let’s first see if you are covered under this enactment or not. This an Act to provide for more effective protection of the rights of women guaranteed under the Constitution who are victims of violence of any kind occurring within the family and for matters connected therewith or incidental thereto. Are you an aggrieved person under this Act? "Aggrieved person" means any woman who is, or has been, in a domestic relationship with the respondent and who alleges to have been subjected to any act of domestic violence by the respondent. What is a domestic relationship? "Domestic relationship" means a relationship between two persons who live or have, at any point of time, lived together in a shared household, when they are related by consanguinity, marriage, or through a relationship in the nature of marriage, adoption or are family members living together as a joint family. Now by going through all these definitions no doubt you can be covered under the said Act as an aggrieved person. Now lets see if your fathers act of not providing finances for you further studies amount to domestic violence or not ? For the purposes of this Act, any act, omission or commission or conduct of the respondent shall constitute domestic violence in case it -
(a) harms or injures or endangers the health, safety, life, limb or well-being, whether mental or physical, of the aggrieved person or tends to do so and includes causing physical abuse, sexual abuse, verbal and emotional abuse and economic abuse. In your case the only criteria that comes near according to this definition is economic abuse, so lets see what actually is economic abuse ? "economic abuse" includes-
(a) deprivation of all or any economic or financial resources to which the aggrieved person is entitled under any law or custom whether payable under an order of a court or otherwise or which the aggrieved person requires out of necessity including, but not limited to, household necessities for the aggrieved person and her children, if any, stridhan, property, jointly or separately owned by the aggrieved person, payment of rental related to the shared household and maintenance;
(b) disposal of household effects, any alienation of assets whether movable or immovable, valuables, shares, securities, bonds and the like or other property in which the aggrieved person has an interest or is entitled to use by virtue of the domestic relationship or which may be reasonably required by the aggrieved person or her children or her stridhan or any other property jointly or separately held by the aggrieved person; and
(c) prohibition or restriction to continued access to resources or facilities which the aggrieved person is entitled to use or enjoy by virtue of the domestic relationship including access to the shared household.
Explanation
II.-For the purpose of determining whether any act, omission, commission or conduct of the respondent constitutes "domestic violence" under this section, the overall facts and circumstances of the case shall be taken into consideration.
In your case not providing finances for you further studies is not covered under any of the above mentioned economic abuses. Even If we take help of section 125 of the Criminal Procedure Code,1973 which provides for the maintenance of the wives, children & parents ,your case is covered under the category of his legitimate or illegitimate minor child, whether married or not, unable to maintain itself. In such case you could be covered only if you were a minor child i.e. less then 18 years of age. In your case you are 26 years of age & you cannot depend on him for financial assistance for your further studies, petrol in the car, books etc from neither him, nor you can enforce it legally. If he fails to provide you or restrict you continued access to resources or facilities which as the aggrieved person is entitled to use or enjoy by virtue of the domestic relationship including access to the shared household. Here shared household include food, clothing & shelter none of which you are deprived or restricted to you by him. Expenses such as petrol for you vehicle or books or admission fee or fee for further studies in no way can be said to be a part of shared household expenses that you seek to claim from him under the provisions of this DV Act,2005. Sorry you cannot get any benefit under this Act & no magistrate will order your father to provide you all these facilities even if he is rich & afford it, if he wants to do it he can at his own sweet will but he cannot be forced or ordered to do so.

Answer 2

wow you really have a problem. Is your mother not saying anything? I can understand that your father wants to get you married because 26 is the right age. He just wants you to get a good husband..there are less chances of it if you are 29. And maybe you will get a husband who will let you continue your studies after marriage. I think your father is worried that you will not be able to get married if it gets too late. Please know that I'm not defending your father's behavior. He should be a little understanding for you. (but he's not, so what to do?) I don't think India has any kind of law about domestic violence..but I'm not sure; i dont live there. My advice is get married to a really nice guy, and I'm pretty sure he will let you continue your studies. Boys are pretty open-minded these days. Good luck

Answer 3

If you are 26, you are an adult who is probably a graduate. Instead of berating your father, go get yourself a job and thereafter finance yourself for further studies, 'expensive items' or whatever it is you desire. If you do not want to get married now, be firm about it. You will find yourself in a much stronger, more independent position if you get yourself a job. There are plenty of good job opportunities available nowadays but unless you make an effort to apply for one, it is'nt going to fall in your lap from the heavens. Have you ever considered that your father might be genuinely worried about getting you married ? After all, you are 26 and not growing younger. I dont know what community you belong to, but in most communities especially tradition bound ones, by 26 most parents would be trying very hard to get their daughters married. As you are still studying, you are certainly not independent, and it is your parents responsibility to see that you are settled. There is nothing constructive to be gained by being jealous about what your father spends on another child. It is his hard earned money which you have not contributed to, and he has every right to spend it as he chooses.

Answer 4

This is not domestic violence but it is ignoring the fundamental right of a person. No case, no suits, the daughter should just move to State Womens Commission or the District Magistrate of the District to act forward. Mind it these days Women have more legal security than ever before and to continue with the studies, even the State sponsors suchh desirous candaidates free of cost. Proceed. Best of Luck.

Answer 5

NO WAY!!! the father is definitely wrong for treating his grown up daughter like that BUT do we really want magistrates forcing fathers to spend their money a certain way??? my God!!! she is a grown up. maybe she needs to move out of the house and get a job and put herself through school instead of wanting daddy to pay for everything.

i say this because in the question above, of course the father sound like a horrible guy. BUT what if a magistrate forced a father to pay for his grown up daughter's schooling because the duaghter tricked the magistrate into thinkign she was a good girl and the father a bad guy BUT in reality she was getting bad grades and sleeping around or taking only one class per semester and spending the rest of the money on drugs? should a father be forced to pay? no way. and please, if you are 26 you are too old to still be living off your parents. get a job.

Answer 6

hey but why is he so rude with you? there must be some reason for his behaviour unless you have provoked him,otherwise it sounds very irrational,it becomes difficult at an later age to come across good proposal , talk to your father try to understand his point of view, you sound like a pampered kid of a rich father, use your pocket money to finance your exams,a job,take one day at a time & forget abt the magistrate u will make the situation more worse

Answer 7

I sympathise with the girl---- 26years?
There should be a limit to complaint also.
Every father wants his daughter to settle happily during his life time so that he can be sure that she has a happy settled life.What competitive exam is she going to write and what degrees she is going to attain?Even doctors and engineers or good IAS boys complete by 25 years their studies and plan to settle by 28 years.I dont find fault for a desire to study.Let her marry a boy who agrees for her studies after marriage.There are many girls who did this and did well.
The other day I read a poor muslim tea stall boy allowing her intelligent bride to complete her engineering and join for training in Infosys.
That is determination and cooperation.We know muslims are more conservative about girl's studies.In this case they faced all that successfully and succeeded.
In your case the girl is suffering from excess of everythjg.Let her have a positive frame of mind or tell the truth that she loves some one who is still not settled and she is fighting for time.

Answer 8

I f your father is slapping you, then yes, it's domestic violence. I don't know the laws of India, but I'm pretty sure it's against the law to abuse your children and since your and adult that can also go for battery.

You have to have independent. You're father only wants you to marry someone, and that's NOT what you want to do. So get out of there and find your own way.

If not, then you'll just have to grit your teeth.

Answer 9

This Hon Minister Renuka, who handles Women and Child Welfare's portfolio and the main encourager of its misuse needs to answer!!

By the way Lady - do you know what the meaning of being a thick skinned is all about? 26 and you cannot still be on your own foot?? You should call yourself a Parasite!! Shame on you to be not able to support yourself at the age of 26!!

Answer 10

The best option for her is to get a job forher survival independant of her father's support and the pursue studies to.
Also, seek a boy of understanding and pusue studies after marriage.
As an adult,she is not entitled for any rights or material benefits benefits .

She is matured enough to decide about her career and future.

Answer 11

If I was a father, and you were my 26 year old daughter still living in my house, I would not act too kindly towards you either. Grow up, take responsibility for your own life, and move out.