She's creating an unhealthy environment for our son by traveling away every week with him to her boyfriends. She won't let him get a job or participate in special activities, because it interferes with her time with her boyfriend. She won't address the issues she's creating and I've had to take her to court to get some help for our son. I just need to hear from other parents who have gone this route, what their experience was, and how effective it was.
2007-05-26 10:04:56 · 6 answers · asked by Staveros 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
14 years old. He's going to be a freshmen.
2007-05-26 10:34:22 · update #1
I have no interest in her relationship. It's the fact my son does not want to spend all his time there, but she forces him to and gives him no other choice and denies his requests to let him get a job, etc. She knows he can stay with me, so he can do this stuff, but won't allow it. I even suggested we be flexable with our schedule, so he can work and participate in sports. She still refuses. This woman has major control issues. Also a history of mental problems and putting our son in bad situations. ie; tried to nurse him until he was 5, taking showers with him up to 5yrs when I raised my concerns, dressing him up in girls clothes, having him sleep in her bed for months at a time, etc. Need I go on? I watched this woman, when he was a baby, grab him by the ear when I was holding him and yank his head around because he had turned away from her to cry on my sholder. I could go on and on.
2007-05-26 10:43:09 · update #2
Kari - read above. Of course I'm bitter. I've always tried to take the high road with her. Last fall, she decided to move over an hour away from my son's school to be with her boyfriend. If it was closer, I wouldn't care. She left it up to my son to tell me. I had to ask her to get her to admit it. I told her it would cause a lot of problems for him. She said, 'yes it will'. She didn't talk to me again about it. I made a voice mail request and post mail request to discuss solutions to the problems that would arrise with our son beeing so far away with her. She ignored my requests. I had to have my attorney file a motion with the courte to get her to talk. She ignored the court and skipped a status conference. All I want is to resolve the issues. I've had to follow through with the motion to get her to concider any solution, but she still won't address how it affects our son. I'm running out of options and she is not one to discuss anything. I've known this for 15 years
2007-05-26 10:51:11 · update #3
You have to understand. I would rather not have to even look at this woman. I don't care for her or what she does in her life. When it comes to our son, that's where I have to deal with her. She is the kind of person that when she makes up her mind about something, that's the way it will be come hell or high water. No one is going to tell her or even suggest to her anything different. I've spent over $2500 with the attorney and courts, cancelled a trip to Alaska with my son, and have to put off building my deck, because the money is going to dealing with her. I really would rather not spend this money dealing with her, but I have to protect our son. She is in no way rational.
2007-05-26 10:59:16 · update #4
It doesn't involve me directly anymore but I do understand how this must upset you. Your son needs more of a stable home to live. Now, I'm not sure about what kind of job he could do at 14, but sports he and other activities he does need to be doing. I would call and let them know what is going on in his life and see if they couldn't do something to make her see what she is doing to her son. Is it possible for you to try and get sole custody, and if not maybe joint where you have him more than you do now. At his age it is very important for him to be able to socialize with others and be more of a child than someone who has to be around Mom's boyfriend all the time. My friend had this problem but it was with the Father. He would insist the kids do all the chores while he sit on the computer, she did call and this helped her get joint custody. They seem to be happier and not as angry as they use to be. Good Luck
2007-05-26 13:53:24 · answer #1 · answered by Krinta 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First off, allow me say, NEVER ever feed a little one below a 12 months cow's milk. There are such a lot of allergic reactions, and issues that might come up from this. Also, meat should not take delivery of to a little one below eight months considering their our bodies cannot digest it. That stated, over feeding a little one is a variety of little one abuse, however you're not ever overfeeding your son. It sounds to me like his being chubby is hereditary and might come from his grandmother. That's by and large dangerous to mention, however that is mainly the case. If you wish, inform her that subsequent time she says some thing, it's going to on the very least get her off your again for a even as. Thirdly, If she does name little one offerings on you, and you don't certainly have a cause for them to take your son, then they wont. DFS does no longer wish to take youngsters from their houses. What they'll do is ship a employee out to examine your residence. They will determine to peer if there's ample meals within the kitchen, how a lot garments the little one has, and cleanliness. They may even speak to you, and in case your boyfriend is there then him too. That is it. If they discover something outrageous then sure, they'll take him. But then, they must do away with a little one from a obstacle like that. If your nostril is blank, then I say allow her name.If she will get ample fake alarms to elevate flags, then they wont take her critically any longer, and might simply give up coming in your apartment. They may even speak along with her earlier than, throughout, and even once they speak with you, and get the 2 experiences. They will see her look, her apartment, and get a consider for who she is. That might support you too. Don't fear approximately this. I understand that sounds tough, however usually folks who're jealous do loopy matters. Hope this helped
2016-09-05 13:05:46 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you are a little bitter towards your ex. That being said... I don't think you need to drag this to court. If your son is upset about this you and him both need to talk to the mom about it. I'm sure there is a better solution maybe you could take the boy back and forth from work if he desires a job.
2007-05-26 10:19:21 · answer #3 · answered by Kari 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What she is doing on her own time with him is not your business. He is to young to get a job. So, unless she is not feeding him, keeping him out of school, and having sex in front of him, you don't have a whole lot of options. He is old enough to decide what parent he wants to live with. So, if your sure he wants to stay with you, seek a modification.
But, to me it sounds like he has a strong attachment to his mother. He may not want to leave her.
And FYI, that is not uncommon to breast feed until school age. If you don't believe me, contact a center, like a health department, and see for yourself.
Good luck.
2007-05-26 11:05:00 · answer #4 · answered by treasuredwife69 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your son is old enough to get a job, he is old enough to say what is best for himself.
What do you think you will accomplish by trying to control someone else's life? Is it really your son that you are interested in helping or is it to control some points of your ex-wife's life?
It doesn't sound like she is a really bad parent, just not what you would have her be.
2007-05-26 10:14:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
how old is your son?
2007-05-26 10:10:12 · answer #6 · answered by NEWPORT BEACH GIRL 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋