Will You Write A Story Using These Shreck Songs?

Question

1. Eating Alone
2. The Perfect King
3. Welcome To Duloc
4. What Kind Of Quest?
5. One Of A Kind Knight!

Shrek please spell it right... I did not *oops*

Answer 1

Dodge City, Kansas
Circa 1876


"Pip Pip And Doodly Do"

PART ONE
As Matt was trying to figure out how to spell "moron," the door to his office opened. In walked Miss Kitty Russell, his former girlfriend. She stood in front of him, raised her dress an inch or two and fluttered her false eyelashes.
Kitty: "Well, hello Cowboy. I'm a little lonesome for some Stud-Like company......And I DO mean, ( 1) Right Now and Not Later........She unfastened the top four buttons of her blouse.
"Is it hot in here, or is it just me ?"
Matt:" Button up, Kitty. This is really not what you want to do. Come on. Get a hold of yourself. Why can't you just (3)Give Us Your Blessings and get on with your life?"
Kitty:"I'd rather get it on with YOU, STUD SAUSAGE !!" She ran over to him and jumped in his lap! Naturally, that was the moment that Matt's new girlfriend, Sunshine MacGillicutty, walked into the office.

Matt was so stunned by Kitty's behavior and so worried that Sunshine would be angry, that he was speechless. Kitty, NEVER at a loss for words, spoke up.
Kitty: "Well, hello, Sunny Side Up. I'm here with Matt discussing VERY important matters." Sunshine looked at Matt. She then looked at Kitty. After carefully examining the situation, she said,:"Oh well....Pip pip and doodly do.

In an hour or so, Matt left Dodge and rode out to Sunshine's farm, a couple of miles out of town. He was still laughing as he entered the little farmhouse. Sunshine put his dinner on the table for him and then went back into the kitchen to clean up. Matt smiled and sat down to a delicious dinner. He wondered why she was so quiet, but figured she just needed some alone time. When he brought his dishes into the kitchen, he came up behind her and put his arms around her.
MAtt: "You were great today, SunnyMac. I just love it when you say that Pippity Do thing of yours. It's great to be with a woman who doesn't get jealous and fly off the handle." He nibbled a bit on her neck. "Why don't we go to bed now, baby. I need a little lovin'." Sunshine politely took his hands off her waist and said:" I'm sorry, STUD SAUSAGE!!!!
(5) Heaven Only Knows what a headache I have !!"

Uh oh. Is there trouble in paradise?

AND NOW…….PART TWO:

“Pip Pip And Doodly Do”
Subtitle….."You're On Your Way To A Smacked Bottom."


Matt was stunned........."Sunny, she sat in MY lap. I did not encourage her......I swear to God!! Why won't you understand? And I wasn't the one who undid her blouse buttons! she did that."
Sunshine:"Her BUTTONS were undone??!! Great!!..........Listen........I really DO have a headache....Why don't YOU understand? Have you seen my Duloc?"
Matt:"I have no idea what that even IS !" She explained it was the medicine that Doc had prescribed for headaches. Matt, a little miffed at Sunshine's attitude, looked in the drawers in their bedroom. He found the bottle of pills and handed it to her......."(3.) Welcome To Duloc." She quietly took the bottle from his hand and went into the kitchen for a glass of water. Matt stood alone in the bedroom. He was at a loss. This was the first time she had ever turned down an invitation for lovemaking........."Well, I suppose I'll be(1) Eating alone, and maybe doing a few OTHER things.......alone."
He sighed.

He undressed quietly and got under the covers......"Time to go to sleep, sweety."
Sunshine:"No thanks....I think I'll stay out on the front porch for a while and play my guitar."
Matt: "Would you like an audience?" He started to get up.
Sunshine:"No thank you." Matt stopped dead in his tracks.......
"Let's see.....She didn't eat with me, she won't sleep with me.......and now she doesn't even want me to listen to her sing.........."This is turning out to be a God awful night."

Sunshine sat outside. It was a warm evening. Her head was filled with lyrics....They soon displaced the ache. Duloc had done it's job.

♫ I was his perfect lady. He was (2) The Perfect King.
Then Kitty came along and ruined everything. (5)One Of A Kind Knight! Oh, what a night. I think I need two more Duloc!!"♫

She started laughing. Suddenly the veil of gloom started to lift.........."What's the matter with me? I know that Matt loves me."

She tiptoed into the bedroom and lay next to Matt. She nudged him......."I'm sorry I was so harsh. Of course I believe you, baby.........baby?" Matt was asleep! She shook him gently. He started to snore......."Matt Dillon! Stop teasing me and wake up! Then she quickly changed her tactics......... "I'm not in the LEAST bit sleepy, you Stud-Meister!" He let out one of those loud, horrible snores!!
Just as she was going to give up, Matt rolled over,grabbed her and kissed her very soundly!
Sunshine:" I KNEW you were awake!" She gave him a gentle punch in the arm. Matt got under the covers and commenced loving on her.
Sunshine:"Hey, STUD SAUSAGE!" Matt laughed. (4) " What Kind Of Quest are you on?"
Matt stuck his head out of the covers, briefly........"You're on your way to a smacked bottom, my dear."

Answer 2

Soprry, Linda...I got half way through and decided it sounded like crap! I thought a few beers would highten my creativity...nope!!