The Dance
The gentleness of her skin
The sway of her dress as she walks
It is an invisible wind
That encircles her that makes her majestic
The simplicity in her smile
And the love in her eyes
The softness of his skin
The shine in his shoes
The warmth from his heart
The gentle shock of his touch in her hand
As he leads her to the dance
The music sways gentle in the
Empty twilight of their passion
Eyes to eyes, body to body
Chest to chest, mind to mind
They are one as they twirl on the floor
Slowly moving together around the floor
It is the endless dance
They dance as though they have never danced before
So full of love and passion for one another
Her in his arms gently laying her head to rest
His arms cradling every inch of her
He holds her close within his chest
She looks up to meet his icy blue eyes
A kiss escapes as the dance lies endlessly ahead
2007-05-26 06:49:56 · 11 answers · asked by Bootylicious L 1 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
I THINK YOU DID GREAT, YOU HAVE SOME TALENT
2007-05-26 06:58:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I thought it was very good. The only thing I would do different in it, and I realize you didn't ask this, would be to change the line about the "empty twilight of their passion." I think their passion is far from empty and nowhere near it's twilight. Seems to be the " heated summer" of their passion to me. It's just my opinion and I probably overstepped the boundaries so I'm sorry for that. Simple answer: it's good.
2007-05-26 14:11:09 · answer #2 · answered by skootrudy&ben 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know someone will give me a "thumbs down" but i didn't like it. maybe it's because i like poetry about as much as i like musicals.
2007-05-26 15:05:44 · answer #3 · answered by frostbite 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like it. Well written. One star for you. :)
2007-05-26 13:56:11 · answer #4 · answered by cajun24 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
SUCKS BIG TIME........Enjoy your career at McDonald's flipping those burgers, cause a writer you ain't.
2007-05-26 13:55:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
i like it ... very good. gives a good mental picture while reading.
2007-05-26 13:53:27 · answer #6 · answered by ♥livingdeadgirl♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well-written
2007-05-26 13:53:45 · answer #7 · answered by Mag 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's alright
2007-05-26 13:53:44 · answer #8 · answered by cuteness 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I didn't like it.
2007-05-26 13:54:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
your stupid poem ...SUCKS..
i think you need to get laid...you know...go DO IT...
2007-05-26 14:02:56 · answer #10 · answered by JJ //aka Nipple 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋