I had an affair with my neighbor's wife, and now she is pregnant?

Question

I'm pretty sure the baby is mine, but my neighbor is so happy his wife is having "his" baby. She doesn't want to tell him it's not his, because it would expose the affair. She thinks he won't know and would only find out if one of us spills the beans. Should I just keep my mouth shut? I feel like one of those birds, that lays eggs in other birds nests, and let's the other bird raise their young.

Answer 1

I think he should know you can not let him bring up a child thinking that it is his yet it isnt that would b so wrong coz if he ever found out in the future it would break him, and are u prepared to stand back and let some other man bring up ur child!!??? what sort of man are u! sort it out!

Answer 2

Keep your mouth shut...for now. You have NO proof its your baby. You and your neighbor were both doing his wife, so it could, in reality, be either of yours. Now if that baby comes out and could not possibly genetically be his and you want to be the "father" in the child's life, then speak up. Just remember, that your neighbor will always be more a part of that child's life than you are because even if you get joint custody, your neighbor will be the baby's father on the mom's weeks...and children tend to bond to a parental unit more readily than a single parent. If your neighbor is a good guy then you may just want to keep your mouth shut anyways. What we all want for our children is the very best life we can give them. So look at the pros and cons before letting your pride get in the way.

Answer 3

Did you ever read 'The Telltale Heart' by Edgar Allen Poe?

Unless you find out whether or not this chiild is yours, it is going to eat at you and eat at you until you go insane. Also, you will have to live next to your neighbor everyday, and things could start to get really uncomfortable if you are feeling or start to feel any guilt from the affair. You need to have a paternity test done after the baby is born; this can be arranged without your male neighbor's knowledge. I really do think that your neighbor deserves to hear the truth----it would be better if his wife could tell him, I think, but go with your gut instict on this. It was a totally uncool thing for both you and the other guy's wife to do, but the damage is done and I sincerely hope that things work out for the best.

Answer 4

The baby just may be his, so don't count your chickens before they hatch. You know what you did was so wrong and the fact you did not think ahead, which apparently your good at, to how it could affect everyone is a real shame. I do not believe the right thing to do is to con some poor man who made a bad choice in letting you be a friend, is the correct thing to do. You both should have thought about the what ifs before hand, or just have left each other alone. Stop being chickenshits and just be truthful. The child deserves the right to be born without being cloaked in secrecy.

Answer 5

It's a cuckoo bird. I say tell the guy, because sooner or later that crap is going to hit the fan, so why not just throw it at the ceiling and get it over with. Yea right don't say anything, so you are perfectly ok with some other dude raising the child YOU fathered? Just get it out now, the longer you wait the worse for everyone involved.

Answer 6

You are bad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You should have thought of the consequences before acting out some stupid fantasy, having an affair with your married neighbor's wife. You sure did lay an "egg" in another nest. Well, this is something you're going to have to live with for the rest of your life.

Get a DNA test to make sure the baby's yours. Check your dates... if you do the right thing and come clean, know that your stupid decision to sleep with this neighbor is going to ruin her life, your life, your wife's life, your marriage, and more.

Stupid! I sure hope whoever reads this learns from your mistake.

Answer 7

This is a very sad situation because of what has happened. Everyone is forgetting about the child, a child who has the right to know the father, and you should also know if you are the father of this child.

I highly suggest you speak with this woman and you both privately get a DNA test done after the child is born. This way you both know exactly who is the father. Do the right thing for the well-being of this child's future.

Answer 8

my mother used to say,'you play with fire: you get burned'
it is going to cause some problems somewhere along the way, however, i don't think that it is YOUR place to do anything about it...
here's why: she is married, you have already caused enough problems by sleeping with her
the baby may or may not be yours
obviously, she doesn't want anymore to do with you or she would have separated from her husband and been with you...she wants to 'pretend' and never really be sure about who the father is...if this child is really your child afterall
do you really want your child suffering the consequences of it's mother's infidelity? if you want to upset the apple cart and cause more damage, then confront the mother and tell her you want a paternity test done after the baby is born...but, brace yourself...some of the apples will be rotten when they spill out
most husbands can tell when their wives have been cheating and if he can't, well, that is HIS problem...obviously, she has been sleeping with both of you...if that is the case, what makes you think it IS your baby? is it so much worth it to 'spill the beans'? what would it gain you? she would be divorced, probably, and doesn't want you or she would be with you and not her husband...the baby didn't do anything to deserve all this rubbish...

Answer 9

If you can I'd keep your mouth shut, more for the child's sake than anyone else's.....if her husband found out the baby was not his he may end up hating it and if they stayed together the child would have to live with that situation and may be treated differently to any other children they may have. But remember that if you are the farther you do have rights and if you want to be part of the baby's life that's up to you.

Answer 10

Wow, that is bad. Let me ask you, do you want to be a part of this baby's life? I would ask for a paternity test to find out for sure first before you make claims. There are so many children out there without the "right" parents. Please find out first and if it is yours, then you have every right to be a part of its life. Ok, so you had an affair but if you are the father then you have rights. Do not let her tell you otherwise. Step up and be a father. I wish you luck, I really do.

Answer 11

Well, this is a mess. Are you married with kids? I think the best solution would be for you to just move to another part of the city. You can't live next door and see your child every day. Better yet if he ever finds out (with DNA it's easy) then not only will your marriage be in jeopardy but you will be paying child support for this kid for the next 18 years. You better hope this kid doesn't look exactly like any of your features. It won't take long for your wife to put 2+2 together if the kids has ears just like yours. That just doesn't happen for no good reason. You need to move and stay out of their lives.