I'm on the verge of cheating, I don't think I'm able to control myself.?

Question

why would you assume I'm a man?! I'm 29 and not at all satisfied with my married. Met a guy. haven't done anything. I just can't stop thinking about him.

Answer 1

hey it's human nature

Answer 2

What is it about the cheating that is so appealing? The other person, just the act, or being uphappy with your spouse?

In any case, the RIGHT thing to do is fix the problem, and that's especially important if you have kids or if you are the higher breadwinner and you live in a state that has alimony.

I can't tell if you're a guy or girl, but ultimately it doesn't matter. Cheating is wrong, and it rarely ends with no one getting hurt, including yourself.

If you're unhappy in your marriage have you talked to your spouse about it? Have you gone to couple's counseling? If the answer is yes to those questions, then you may simply want to consider separation and/or divorce, which would therefore let you be with whomever you chose. If the answer is no, you should really look at both of those things first. After all you at one time were in love with this person to say "till death do you part", so you really owe it to each other to attempt to work things out. If you try and it still falls apart, you will at least have the satisfaction of knowing you gave it all you had.

If it attraction is specific to one other person, then perhaps you are with the wrong person to begin with. However, consider that an affair with someone else always makes them look rosier than they would be if you were married to them. It's a fantasy, and you aren't there when they are wearing their old underwear washing the dirty dishes. You're sneaking around, they're wearing their sexiest outfits, and you only see that fantasy side of things, which often makes your reality pale in comparison. But it's not a fair comparison.

Maybe you and your spouse need a getaway. Maybe you need something to bring the romance & mystery and spark back into your relationship. Maybe they have the capacity to do that. In order to achieve that, you have to talk about it with them.

Cheating is a short term fix that will (99% of the time) lead to bigger problems later, and that is doubly so if you have kids, who don't deserve to be mixed up in your mess.

Answer 3

You havent done it yet, therefore you are able to control yourself. Cheating is disgusting and disrespectful in a lot of ways. How would you feel if your significant other cheated on you? If you want to be with someone else, then end your current relationship. Either you want to be with that person or you don’t, you cant have your cake and eat it too. Cheating ruins everything and you’ll only be full of guilt and regret afterwards. Right now, you’re looking for a reason to cheat… practice some self control. Love your man or leave him, don’t go behind his back. good luck.

Answer 4

No big deal. find someone who respects the fact that you are married and are just looking to have some fun. Hit it a couple of times and then be done with it. Do not try to have a relationship and don't get pussie whipped. She is not your wife she's just fun, never forget that. Get your jollies off and go home as if nothing has ever happened and never mention it to anyone....ever! And forget about what these people here are saying, they'll be cheating too in due time. Most people do it a t least once.

Answer 5

Well if you're writing this question then you obvisiously know that it's wrong and that you shouldn't do it.
You are making the concious decision to cheat--you have control over your body and your actions so it's really dumb to say you can't control yourself.
What you need to do is really think about it--What is the point in cheating? Why would you want to stay with someone and cheat on them? You obvisiously don't love them. Don't be so selfish--if you love the person your with and you want to be with them-then break off all ties with the person you want to cheat with. If you don't love the person your with then why stay with them? Break up with this person immediately and then you won't be cheating.

But most of all take responsibility for your own actions!

Answer 6

If you don't feel like you can be faithful, get out of the relationship now. It is not worth the turmoil you would undoubtedly put the other person through... speaking from experience. It is better to save face and hurt someone with a seperation that to kill their spirit by cheating on them.

Answer 7

Write down a list of what happens when your caught. Divorce is one of the most painfull lfe changing things. Think of all the people you will hurt including your self..I ended up in the mental ward almost lost my job. my son wont talk to me. I rebounded into another marriage, This was 30 years ago..The first question they asked when i had a mild heart atack Marriage breakdown?. If your not happy break up gracefully. The screwing you get is not worth it

Answer 8

thats wrong.
if you love your partner, you need to tell him/her.

control yourself at least until you have time to break up, if that is in fact what you want. cuz if you want to cheat, that just proves there is something wrong in your current relationship.
try communicating with your partner to solve the problem, or admit to him/her that you are on the verge of cheating and dont think you can control yourself. at least this way he/she will know what they've got coming, or will break up with you and then you wont have to dump him/her.
maybe they will agree to a threesome.
or they will try harder to be a better lover, and explore more sexually, so that you wont feel the need to cheat.

Answer 9

Well, i think that if you want to cheat, your not ready for a relationship. Or maybe you don't love, or want to be with the person you are with anymore. In that case i think that you should tell her the truth, rather then to cheat on her. She deserves to know the truth. This way you can be free to do what ever.

Answer 10

There's really far too little information here and not much of a question either. You are in control, not your hormones or whatever is driving you to cheat on whoever you're going to cheat on. You always have a choice.

Answer 11

what makes you think you can not control yourself? Maybe you need to walk away for a bit and gether yourself, if you are that dependant on what you are getting from this other person you need to find out why you can't have it in your current relationship. What is missing and can you fix it before you cheat? If not you need to walk aways from your current.