What Does Feminism Mean To You?

Question

I've been a feminist prochoice pro-ERA man for a few decades now. I recently ignited a discussion (not the 1st, I've been curtly told) about a man's right to choose in cases of unwanted pregnancy. Shocked to my core by many feminists' rather heartless, even nasty & hateful, answers to my questions, I am left wondering what feminism means to you?

As the feminist who taught me said.

"Feminism is about self- determination. Its me and its my body. I take responsibility for what goes into my body be it food or an unprotected penis. If I depend upon someone else (a man) I am surrendering my fate to him. I am the one who gets pregnant not him. I am the one who must suffer birth. Not him. My body changes not his.
I am the one responsible for that child not him. I will not entrust my fate to another. I can only lose. If we agree to a partnership, fine. If not, fine. Its my decision not his.
And similarly I will not decide for him."
That's a feminist, if you ask me.
I'm asking you?

Answer 1

You've really hit a nerve here, I think you've asked a very fair question. I think that every group that includes human beings (none of us are perfect) is prone to attracting fundamentalists. The problem with fundamentalism, liberal or conservative, is that it often dehumanizes the other side, which in my opinion is poor critical thinking.

I value my right to choose very much. That said, I carry a responsiblity to keep my own body healthy. I cannot expect someone else to do it for me. I can, however, expect the government not to interefere with my options in case I, as a human being, make a mistake.

I think men have a point that the right to choose is very much in the favor of the person holding the womb. If I were a male and I accidentally impregnated a female I would support her decision but yes, it would really bother me if she elected parenthood for the two of us when I wasn't ready. I can understand a man feeling this way and he should not be chided for these feelings, in my opinion.

That said, we all know how reproduction works. It is our responsibility as sexually mature individuals to make damned sure we avoid reproductive activities or make sure to use more than adequate birth control. If I were a man I would use a condom every time, regardless of whether she said she was taking contraceptives or not. Knowing that guys don't have the final say should be even more incentive to wrap that thing up. It's his duty if he's not ready for fatherhood and chooses to have sex. Again, both sexes know how this works. Our bodies reproduce when this act is committed. No news here. I've always thought critical thinking should be taught in high school, along with sex ed.

Otherwise, in a nutshell I'll use a cliche' to sum up my version of feminism. It's pretty simple- treat me the way you want to be treated.

Answer 2

I think your description is a feminazi.

A person who is convinced that it is her child only, when it took your sperm to help create that child is either a moron or willing herself to live in the dark to feel safe about a world she hates.

The fact is, any point of view that so horribly polarizes another is most likely skewed.

A feminist to me is a woman who values her right to choose just as much as she values her ability to listen. She seeks to not only be understood, but to understand as well. She takes a moment to realize that not all men are the enemy, just as a man must realize he must tread carefully because women have been abused for far too long. I am not pro-life or pro-abortion. I will say this...any woman who has the "right" to allow an unprotected penis into her body, also has the responsibility to deal with those consequences. If she and the man who had sex with her agree to an abortion, so be it. If they do not, then they need to discuss it. Just because you can, does not always mean you should.

Answer 3

^^
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from an idiot and misandrist


What's your question? A 6 word sentence followed by two paragraphs of MISOGYNISTIC RANTING.

"As the feminist who taught me said.
"Feminism is about self- determination. Its me and its my body. I take responsibility for what goes into my body be it food or an unprotected penis."

WHAAAT? Make it up as you go along, eh? Anything for a crank, eh? The 'feminist' who 'taught you'???? What transparently pure and unadulterated BS.

PLEASE DO THE HUMAN RACE A FAVOUR AND GET A VASECTOMY - just in case -------

BUT: I don't expect this is much of an issue for you in the first place - protected pee-pee or NOT.

Your best friend is your right hand, as it always was and always will be.

Answer 4

Simply, feminism means the movement for gender equality, with emphasis on the disadvantages of women.

The feminist you described sounds like my kind of woman.

Answer 5

The dictionary definition of feminism is very clear and concise ---- which does not allow a person to pick-and-chose the parts of "equality" they like and reject those they dislike.

One can't create one's own private definition for a thing that is already dictionary defined. That would mean the thing (feminism in this case) *has* no definition.

How can a person *truly* believe in equality (which is ostensibly the core principle of feminism), except when it's inconvenient?

That is one of the major problems that causes so much dissent and discord here. People conveniently create their own private definitions that conflict with the agreed-upon definition.

Answer 6

i don't remember who said this but it has stuck with me:
"Feminism is the crazy idea that women are human beings"

the feminist who taught you sounds like a man-hating nazi like somebody else said up there.

to me, feminism is NOT about hating men. it is treating yourself with respect and not letting a man see or treat you as his inferior. that doesn't mean you don't depend on him. that's how a partnership works. you depend on EACH OTHER. it takes two to make a baby. if a woman is lucky enough to have found a man who wants to help raise their child (what an ironic phrase) then who is she to take that right from him? when in a realtionship of ANY sort, whether it be with your boyfriend or your sister, if a decision affects both of you, then it needs to be agreed with by both of you.

Answer 7

Demanding the same as a man - not more, not less, just equal. So if I go to the same college, get the same grades and score the same job, I expect the same pay, and I expect equal respect. Female, 13, student.

Answer 8

Put simply My definition would run something along the lines of:
"The procurement of equality of status, equanimity of purpose, Self actualization and Self determination with a view towards the creation of a tangible tradition of egalitarian compact between all people, regardless of circumstance or position. gender or creed".
Pehaps a tad too liberal for some, but You did ask.

Answer 9

feminism to me means alot more than just making your own decision for yourself, it also mean accepting your decision by others and also respecting it too, just like woman respecting the decision made by men . Not telling you after all you are woman after making such decision as if they have more than one head.

Answer 10

Feminism?

It’s angry, fear induced hatred of women, by women.

Before feminism – I wasn’t less valuable than a man, just different, in many ways I was MORE valuable than a man. It took a feminist to make me less valuable, and less important.

I don’t have any more choices now, not realistically – just different choices.

After feminism... well – everyone is miserable now.