My parents use to argue and fight all the time and i feel like its because of me. (They divorced three years ago)! And it just pisses me off! I feel guilty, its cuz i act like a spoil brat sometimes and i dont reliaze it. I wasnt raised to be spoiled, its just how i started growing up as, like who i became as a person!
i dotn know how i became this way and my parents use to fight about me all the time, im not an oly child. i have three brothers and two sisters.we live in a large household, yes, my oldest brother moved in with us with his two kids and i guess it became to crazy in the house, i just changed!!!
what should i do? i want to become the same person i was before i became this hasty old b*tch!
2007-05-24 15:28:00 · 25 answers · asked by Hawaiian MKG Surf Girl 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Parents do not divorce because of their children, unless there are issues of child abuse, which does not appear to be your cause.
The number one cause of divorce is debt.
The fighting you saw, was hiding other issues in their marriage. I pray you still have a good relationship with your parents, they will always love you.
I would suggest you talk to your mom if you are living with her and see if she can find a doctor for you to talk about your feelings of guilt and other issues, you will find this very helpful and will make you feel better.
I wish you the best.
2007-05-24 15:37:53 · answer #1 · answered by oldcorps1947 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, I can tell you right now that your parents didn't divorce because of you. They divorced because whatever problems they had, they couldn't face together. In other words, you could have caused all the drama in the world, but if your parents truly loved each other, they would have joined forces and dealt with you together. I'm sure your "spoiled brat" antics didn't make things any easier, but rest assured there is a bigger picture to this. It's time to let go out the guilt.
As for returning to the person you were before. I think you already are. Truly spoiled rotten people, don't have guilt, nor do they care about the feelings of others. And you are caring...just by writing your question. If you feel bad about your behavior, apologize for it and make better choices next time. I know it's hard to fit in with a big family and everyone has their own game plan to get some attention, but being nasty and getting negative attention doesn't compare to behaving and getting love in return. hang in there kiddo, you'll understand it a little better as you grow older.
2007-05-24 15:43:49 · answer #2 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are many reasons why people divorce. Maybe they've grown apart. Maybe the love they once had for each other has changed. Maybe they fight and just can't agree about things. Every couple has their own reasons for divorce. Whatever the reasons are, one thing is for sure: Kids don't cause divorce.
Still, many children of divorced parents believe they are the reason their mom and dad got divorced. They think that if only they had behaved better, gotten better grades, or helped more around the house, the divorce wouldn't have happened. But this isn't true. Divorce is between moms and dads only!
Even if you once heard your parents argue about you, or your friend next door thinks his parents broke up because he got in trouble at school, these things don't cause a husband and wife to end their marriage. You may feel you're to blame for your parents' divorce, but you are not the cause. And the fact that your parents decide not to stay married is not your fault.
2007-05-24 15:33:55 · answer #3 · answered by Danielle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boo, If in the morning you can look in the mirror and like who you see then its all good. But if for some reason you don't then its time to change. First you have to be real with self. You have to not only want to change. But you have to take the step to change. Baby change is such a beautiful thing. There are so many lessons that come with change. It takes time and demands very hard work. The journey of a thousand miles start with the very first step... Just take one. Dee
2007-05-24 15:36:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, you need to know that your parents DID NOT divorce because of you. They have their own problems that don't involve you. Don't feel guilty, you didn't cause it. Maybe your feeling like your personal space was taking away from you when your brother and his kids moved in. Don't stress. It will all get easier.
2007-05-24 15:35:05 · answer #5 · answered by confused angel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your parents made the choice to not be together because of them, how they feel, not because of you... you can not carry this with you... go and talk to them, thats what they are for.. if you are a spoiled brat, then they may have some involvement in that, but thats not a reason to divorce.
2007-05-24 15:33:33 · answer #6 · answered by emtb9 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the point to start at is to look at your life and find out what truly caused the change. I doubt your parents divorced because of you. Anyway, it's not about them right now. Look at your life, and find out what you don't like and change it. It's hard, but the end result will be a happier you.
2007-05-24 15:32:53 · answer #7 · answered by notarycat 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I bet there were many other problems in the marriage besides you. You are not the ONLY cause, but your "brattyness" is a factor...so change before you ruin your own love life soon. I'm not responding to tell you what you want to hear, rather the truth. Tough love bratz!
2007-05-24 15:41:55 · answer #8 · answered by Ignorant? R-U? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never, never think that your parents divorced because of you. They divorced because of each other. Parents fight all the time about their children. Yes, they are divorced, but they still have to be a team when it comes to you and your siblings.
2007-05-24 15:32:37 · answer #9 · answered by Jessica 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it sounds like your parents raised you to be a spoiled brat, but it's not your fault that they divorced.
2007-05-24 15:31:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋