English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

I wrote this poem. I want comments!

2007-05-24 14:36:05 · 8 answers · asked by Ashley M 1 in Arts & Humanities Poetry

Sometimes, no matter the age difference,
The love you have for one another is like no other.
The things that you thought you would never say
Are now coming out of your mouth.
The people you hated with a passion
Are now your family you know and love.
The bad habits that you were embarrassed about
Are reasons why people love you.
The classes you failed because you slept all class long
Are now classes you participate in because you’re awake.
The television shows that you hated so much
That you changed the channel when ever you saw a preview
Are now television shows you love so much
That if you miss an episode,
You’ll punish yourself by locking yourself in your room all day.
The way you have changed for this special someone are ways
You would never change for anyone else.
This change for you is the best thing that ever happened to you,
And that special someone that you changed for,
You would do anything for, even if it meant your life.

2007-05-24 14:37:22 · update #1

8 answers

That was pretty good keep it up :o)

2007-05-24 14:41:52 · answer #1 · answered by br674 2 · 0 0

i admire how the start and center style of journey up and you probably did not experience the might desire to make each and every thing rhyme which some human beings look to think of is the standards of a solid poem. perhaps ypu might desire to shorten or use distinctive language beginning at "All you may desire to do is look at me" For some reason, it variety of feels to alter the temper for me and the final line "and you will omit the way i used to be" style of seems out of place because of the fact something of that's talking approximately you and being very just about candy yet that final line style of purely approximately sounds threatening to me. i admire how this is elementary and private, from the middle...save it alongside that line. that's solid however, probably extra helpful than i might desire to write.

2016-10-13 09:40:56 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

I really like it. Its sweet. I have been writting poetry since age 9 and now i am almost 16. That sounded sincere you should perform it as slam poetry. Whatever inspires you keep it up. I love to write poetry so u can always e-mail me @ almarazruth@yahoo.com-- Keep writting!

2007-05-24 14:43:54 · answer #3 · answered by Sh00ting_St@r! 4 · 0 0

I like it..its kinda Like...turning your life around thinking about it. Learning to change things for the and appreciating what good they can bring you and how they can benefit you. Its very good and I cant wait to see more of your work.

Very Positive and Encouraging. It cuases you to think about your life actually, and to see if you need to change anything.

2007-05-24 15:39:28 · answer #4 · answered by Irvine Wolf 2 · 0 0

I read it. It's ok. It could be worked on. But poetry is more on feeling than on structure. In other words poetry is good if it conveys your true feelings at that time.

2007-05-24 14:48:19 · answer #5 · answered by NightWalker97 2 · 0 0

Bravo, a new Shaespeare born...

2007-05-26 22:54:46 · answer #6 · answered by shakeeb 4 · 0 0

this is my opinion only. i was OK. nothing caught my interest. it was just OK.

2007-05-24 14:39:05 · answer #7 · answered by REALLY 5 · 0 0

that cool!!!

2007-05-24 14:38:51 · answer #8 · answered by nerdy! 5 · 0 0

fedest.com, questions and answers