2007-05-24 14:28:24 · 7 answers · asked by amber 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
only if you believe in it
otherwise
no it does not work
both sides must be able to deal with any criticism and hard truths that may spring from such conseling sessions
2007-05-24 14:33:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
HI Amber,
I think you are asking the question out of hope, and that's a good first sign. You say that the both of you want to try and cooperate, that's another good sign.
Now, let's get down to the bottom line, OK? If you've both messed up and been bad, maybe it's possible to start over with a clean slate, huh? If it was only one of you, both have to understand that the "offended" party has to have time to learn to trust again, and that's not a gimme.
Yes, I think counselors can help, but it all has to start and end with an understanding between the two of you. Everything that is agreed to has to be binding. Another mess up will surely be devastating.
It's time, I think, for both of you to strip away all your secrets and suspicions, put all your cards on the table, and most importantly, be realistic about your futures (together or apart).
What do you think? Best of luck.
2007-05-24 21:46:55 · answer #2 · answered by boomerdude 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The last article I checked on the web (about 5 months ago) indicated marriage counseling was less than 40% effective, with some indicating that it made their marriages worse. I'm sorry I don't have the source to cite you. The two sets of friends that I have who actually went to marriage counseling are still married, but not real happily. They said that counseling did work for awhile while they were going. But when they stopped going, both couples said they reverted back to their old ways.
2007-05-24 21:39:35 · answer #3 · answered by Sondra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then you both are off to a great start and marriage counseling will work. Willingness to try and cooperate is the biggest hurdle in trying to save a marriage. Best of luck to you both
2007-05-24 21:43:53 · answer #4 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"""Personally""""my thoughts are.... i don't think it can heal a broken marriage SOMETIMES it is the best to just leave. It won't help at all if both people are not 100% commited to working things out. Once things have got to this point it's a 50/50 shot to seek help.
2007-05-24 21:54:28 · answer #5 · answered by golly geesh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lot of it depends on the counselor... and
the couple.
IF the counselor doesn't take sides... and the
couple are 'honest' about their problems,
feelings and thoughts then yes, it can help.
But, if anyone of those factors are missing,
then no, it won't help.
2007-05-24 21:33:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
must have truth, honesty, openness and a great counselor. must must must. Both must be willing to be flexible, too. Good luck. And remember it is not easy, but worth it. =-)
2007-05-24 21:47:15 · answer #7 · answered by Katie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋