i'm flirting with my friend's boyfriend, what should i do?

Question

kk well i've asked ?'s about this guy. my friend and me have been tight foreva. well i dated this guy, and he'd hurt me before buti gave him anotha try, but ya he hurt me again. so ya 2 days later she started datin him! after she'd seen how much he'd hurt me and how (stupidly) i still love him. but she did and i'm still hurtin, but me and her bf have been hangin out alot lately and doin things. like we'll secretly meet to make out ect.... and i just recently found out they had sex for her first time. i'm still a virgin, but we've talked about it. i feel confident in my decisions on wut i do with him and i had seriously considered having sex with him, but it felt wrong wen i found out about them.i feel bad but hangin with him feels soo right at the same time. idk wut to do. i no i'm hurtin her, but she hurt me and i love him. he tells me he loves me, but he tells her he loves her too! god i'm confused? wut can i do?

Answer 1

Forget the guy. You gave him two chances, he burnt you twice. There's a saying that goes: 'Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me'. Don't make the same mistake and end up getting hurt the third time. It's simply more worth it.

I'd suggest having a good, long chat with your friend. Don't accuse her or come across yelling. Have a good chat, tell her how you feel calmly. Tell her although this guy hurt you before, you somehow still feel for him and don't feel good seeing the two of them together. That's not to say they must break up on your account, only that if she happens to stay on with the guy, to be more sensitive to your needs and not have him tag along when you are around.

It may be a little late, but give a good natured warning that doesn't come across as bitter. Tell her exactly what kind of guy he is, that he hurt you before and you don't want your friend to get hurt. But if she doesn't take it, leave it. She'll have to learn the hard way. And when she does, she'll find out, like many of us in life have, that while boyfriends and lovers come and go, it's the friends we have that stay by our side throughout our lives. Until you find you life partner, that is. People who realise that make the best friends, and you can count on her to stay by you no matter what in the future after she's learnt from her little mistake.

Answer 2

You sound like you are a teenager. Please listen to this lesson:

Just because something makes you happy or "feels sooooo right" doesn't mean that it is. This is about your ego, about feeling cared about, or about your hormones.

He doesn't really love either of you. He may think he does, but that's not mature love. When all is said and done, this guy is racking up girls to have sex with and your friend is going to have lost her virginity to a guy she will not be with forever and who actually cares about her so little that he's cheating on her.

Another lesson: treat others the way you would want to be treated. It doesn't matter if she hurt you or not--you should do what is right because you know it is right (morally), not because you are mad at her or because he makes you feel good. And frankly, what you are doing is worse than what she did because she wasn't seeing him while you were still seeing him.

Try to think about this 10 years down the road: is this guy still likely to be in your life? No. He'll probably have had 10 sexual partners by that point. Is this friend someone you'd like to still have in your life? Will you look back on your decisions 10 years from now and possibly regret them? Do what you know is right, not what will necessarily make you feel good.

Answer 3

You have to ask yourself how hangin out can feel so right with a guy who's two-timing two girls at the same time. He's talking you into having sex with him for the first time. Meanwhile he's already had sex with her, making it her first time. Wow, this guys likes to spread himself around, doesn't he?
But then, he hurt you and so then you dropped him. Then she hurt you so you picked him up again and now he's going to hurt you because he's a lyin' cheat! Why not save yourself a whole lotta heartache, and do her a favor too - tell this jerk that he has to date both of you at the same time. And you expect to be picked up together, he has to take you to the same movie, hold both of your hands, buy both of you popcorn, feel you both up during the movie and then take you both home and make out with one after the other before bidding you goodnight! Tell him he can forget about the group sex, though - there are limits to everything.

Answer 4

Seriously, I don't think this guy is worth the trouble. You should tell your friend how you feel, and maybe you can sort something out. This guy shouldn't come between your friendship. If he really loves either of you, he would stop this. But what you have to do is back off. If you want to keep your friendship, just leave her boyfriend to her and let her see if she wants to keep him around. Even though this guy used to be yours, you've got to respect that she's got a current relationship with him. You can still talk to the guy, but know that being with him would be betraying your friend, and that's something you don't want to do. Even though she betrayed you, which is wrong, you've got to respect her. That's the only way you can keep your friendship.

Answer 5

You should stop doing what you're doing with your friends boyfriend, because right now he is technically HER boyfriend and if she finds out you'll regret it, you'll have lost a friendship. Wait until she and the guy break up, and THEN you can do whatever you want with him. But for now, just let her have him because it is unjust to her and him if you're there for him to cheat on her.
If he really loves you then he will eventually break up with the friend and come back to you anyway, and if you really love him you would wait for him, or else this will make his life a hell when his gf/your friend finds out what you two have been doing behind her back.
Don't sink to your friend's level (as she went out with him 2 days after you guys broke up) by helping her bf cheat.

Answer 6

He hurt you before so you gave him another shot and he did it again. Sounds to me he is not worth losing your friend over. Men come and go but friends stay together forever. But it sounds like that your friend still went out with him after she saw how he hurted you. Maybe you should comfront your friend on how you feel about him and they're relationship. If you still love him than think about how he is playing your friend and you. After that thought you probably won't love him anymore.

Answer 7

The guy is obviously two timing both of you. Hmmm, I wonder if there is a third or fourth girl in there somewhere.

You and your friend should both dump him and not be in competition with each other. This guy is obviously telling both of you what you want to hear just to get in your pants. Sure you love him, your friend loves him too, but does he really love both of you? That's really hard to do!

I wonder what he's saying about both of you to all of his guy friends........

Answer 8

Dump him like he was a hot ember! You can do better. They only thing he loves is the 3 inches between his legs. You aare a sweet person and will have your choice of boys. Pick on e that will love you for you and not what he can take from you.

Answer 9

It wasnt really nice of your friend to do that to you but u shouldnt be doing that ethier. If your friend finds out that could turn into something huge and u need to decide if ur going to chose a guy u like over your best friend.

Answer 10

You are making yourself look like a fool. For one your friend is not your friend if she is dating your ex and this boy is loving life, getting to **** two girls that are friends, you might as well have a three-some because in the long run you are going to end up allowen with no friend and no man!