Ladies, what is the best way to put your wife in a great mood even though she comes home tired and walks...?

Question

into 2 spun kids (both under 2 1/2) when she gets home. She does not like to eat before going to sleep, some type of diet no-no so I am told, she could care less about flowers, candy or other material junk. I work my 40+, make dinner for the kids at night and have them ready for bed when she gets home (she is a gymnastics coach so she works until later in the evening since the kids she coaches are in school all day) Before she loved dressing in lingerie 4-5 times a week and the attention she would get by being in it, but the kids have sucked the life out of any type of spontinaity, dont know, something about getting 2 toddlers to bed after dealing with teenagers all evening kills the want to do anything but watch some tv and go to bed. Any recomendations would be appreciated. Back/foot rub? Drawn bath? mixed drink? running out of ideas.

She works doing private lessons on Saturdays, at which time I do the vast majority of the laundry, vacuuming, dusting, cleaning, as the kids are not on my leg all day as they are with her.

So dont immediatly assume I am lacking in some area, pointing a finger is the easy way out.

Answer 1

As a mother of toddlers myself, I can appreciate this problem. Your wife's #1 idea of heaven is probably to not be "on call" for a short while. It can be hard to sometimes turn our brains off from everything while our loved ones or the housework or whatnot are still within eyesight. Even if I am taking a relaxing bath, I can't help but get a little stressed out if I hear a little voice crying, or if there's a big pile of laundry in the bathroom.

It's difficult to say what would be most apprciated by your wife, but I would recommend any activity where she is truly no longer "on call". A bath is my personal favorite, but it's ten times better if DH takes the kids out to the McDonald's play zone for and hour, too. He also occasionally sends me off to the Barnes and Noble for a few hours on a Saturday afternoon, which is wonderful.

If your wife's main problem is that she is feeling tired, may I suggest tidying up the bedroom a bit? Put on a few lit candles, lay out a comfy nightgown, a bottle of lovely-smelling lotion, and a good book or her favorite guilty pleasure (puzzle magazines for me). Then let her know that you'll be happy to come keep her company, if she wants to call you, otherwise you'll be in the other room putting the kids to bed (if they aren't already) Odds are she will be eager to reconnect with you after a little while, but otherwise you'll still have a very grateful wife who appreciates your concern.

You sound like a really sweet husband. Don't worry, in a few years the kids will be less of a handful and everyone will have more energy. :-)

Answer 2

Backrub - yes
foot rub - yes
drawn bath - yes
mixed drink - yes....
especially if you do them without an agenda.
Don't turn on the TV. Have at least one night a week when you just talk, or listen to music, or dance barefoot in the living room.
Have a date night once a week - even if you don't spend any money [ except on the sitter ]. Go out to eat, see a movie, buy each other anniversary gifts. Try not to talk about problems on date night, or discuss kids.
If she complains to you about outside problems, just listen :
don't offer suggestions unless she asks for them. Sometimes women just need to vent.
Ask her what she'd like to do in her next block of free time -
go to the salon, a bookstore, take kids to the park, etc. Let her choose.
Make sure she knows how much you appreciate her every day, not just when you're horny. When she comes home, run to the door with the kids, say " mommy's home!" and give her a hug and kiss. Pretty soon the kids will do it without you.

Answer 3

I like the babysitter idea. The back/foot rub, drawn bath FOR TWO with no lights but lit candles sounds great too. Just make sure you are helping out with laundry and cleaning. That always puts wives in a good mood. Sexually good mood... have a weekend getaway. Talk to her about missing her touch etc....

Answer 4

terrific humorous tale i've got heard in a looong time! The punch line became the icing on the cake by way of fact before the very final assertion, I sort of became questioning hmmmm this may well be a stable ingredient that somebody ought to apply something that's no longer getting used - then her husband's d_ _ _ wasn't getting used ha ha ha!!! I wager there are somewhat some husbands in actual existence that have a similar ingredient!!! ;-O

Answer 5

Sounds like you are already helping her a lot by taking care of the kids in the evening.

Compliment her on her appearance. Tell her how sexy you find her. Take her out on a surprise romantic evening on a day she doesn't work. Give her a massage, draw her a bath, all those ideas seem like good ones.

Answer 6

I'm not a lady, but I do know what my parents used to do when my siblings and I were young, to keep themselves from getting too stressed out with us. Find a babysitter for a night, preferably on one of her days off, and take her out on a date. Do something romantic for her without expecting anything in return. Write her a poem, and take her to dinner. Then, go for a walk on the beach or something. Or treat her to a day at the spa or something so that she gets a chance to relax. It must be very tough on both of you with two little kids. Time alone, without the kids, should definitely help.

Answer 7

Try giving her a back rub without expecting anything in return. Most of us hate the thought that our husbands only do nice things for us because it might lead to sex. As far as finding time goes it's starting to sound like you guys need to call in sick for the day.

Answer 8

It is definitely something you are doing. Yes, she may be tired, but you still aren't pulling your weight somewhere in her eyes. You really need to talk to her. Sex is indicitive of a couple's communication. I bet if you ask her, you you will dicover some things you felt completely different about. With that said. It is definitly something she isn't doing.

Answer 9

give her a back rub take a bath with her anything romantic that you know she will be content.