I hate my Sil. She told my husband i am immature and not to listen to me. we dont live with in laws.We are abroad. I have supported my husband in his job losses ,money problems and his severe anger problem . Now i am exhausted after 5 yrs of these downs.I need to give her back. How do i do it subtly. She lives in India.Any advice.
2007-05-24 03:32:16 · 19 answers · asked by chocolate 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Right from the time i married her brother,she acts like i am some poverty stricken girl who stuck gold with her brother.And my husband's family worships the place where she walks.I need to give her back and put her in place as she thinks its her decision everywhere.My engagement and marriage functions were horrible thanks to her and after marriage she wudnt let my husband talk to me for 2 min till we were in India. She just wants to lord over me as she does with everybody and i wont let her do it.
2007-05-24 04:12:29 · update #1
Take the high road and ignore her. Retaliating will only give her more ammunition to bash you with, behind your back.
2007-05-24 03:35:44 · answer #1 · answered by hello 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure I completely understand this situation. However, you should talk to your husband about this. You two need to make some joint decisions & he needs to support you. You both need to present a united front.
When dealing with his family, your husband should be the one to take the lead. As an in-law your comments would most likely be seen as interference. When coming from a blood relations, less so. Let your husband deal with his sister after you two have discussed the proper, united, course of action.
2007-05-24 10:39:18 · answer #2 · answered by retropink 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First things first. Revenge is the Lord's, not ours. He will take care of it ;) I surely hope your husband is sticking up for you against his family ( I don't understand why some men don't). Perhaps you need to talk to him. Pray for God to let your husband see all that you do for him and ask to help. I won't tell you what to do, but if your husband doesnt put his foot down about your sil talking ill of you, then you need to talk to her. It's not her business. Dr. Phil once said, "It's your spouses responsibility to fix the problem between you and his/her family". Good Luck!
2007-05-24 10:42:35 · answer #3 · answered by Dear Jenny 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Show your maturity and shake this off like a big girl. People are going to talk about you...that's life. You can't let it bother you and you certainly should never confront this sort of juvenile behavior directly because in the end, it only makes you look equally bad.
Tell your husband that while you appreciate his honesty, that when your sister-in-law is spouting off childish nonsense, such as this, it would be better for the entire family if he didn't repeat it, even to you, as it only perpetuates the circle.
See! Does that sound like someone who is immature and whose opinion shouldn't be listened to?
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Okay, you apparently aren't going to take our advice. You are intent on proving your sister-in-law right. Bad idea.
2007-05-24 10:37:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Your sister in law must be quite powerful to be able to control her brother's mind from such a long distance. Anyway, no need to be unduly bothered. Ignoring her would be a good idea. But if you want revenge then you have to slowly and tactfully poison your husband's ears against her. He doesn't appear to exercise his mind freely in family matters. If he is apt to follow one woman blindly, why not another, especially if she happens to be his wife? It is just a matter of time and patience on your part.
2007-05-25 14:36:41 · answer #5 · answered by Modest 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's his sis. If you're badmouthing her to him it would be immature and he shouldn't listen. All this hate talk sound pretty immature too. Maybe you should consider if she has a point.
If not, politely and calmly tell her you appreciate all the support she's given your husband, accepting his chosen wife and life. Tell her the vows you and her brother took mean the world to you and you will continue to do your best to build a good life for him and your family. Tell her you're glad she understands how important family is and maybe in the future you two can build a closer relationship.
Then watch her choke.
2007-05-24 10:41:06 · answer #6 · answered by tabby90 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Past is past do not let her near you or your husband.
I think she is not any where near you so good reddens.
Stay abroad, let her be in India. Do not do any thing, you have to take high road , do not try to "give her back". This can only bring her back in your life and fuel the conflict.
2007-05-24 18:26:15 · answer #7 · answered by minootoo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes i hate mine too girl... i totally understand what u r going through .. the same **** is happening with me. Just ignore her. N if she wont stop .. confront her. Yeah contact me n we will talk about these *** SIL. my email add is shaheen_21_2000@yahoo.com
2007-05-24 12:14:02 · answer #8 · answered by moshak 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Subtly? I would simply tell her to shut up about your personal business and to stop talk to your husband.
2007-05-24 10:37:25 · answer #9 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
What's a Sil?
2007-05-24 10:41:23 · answer #10 · answered by juggalizzle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋