During the past 3 yrs not only have my best friend and I gotten close, spent heaps of time together, but we have become a masive part of each others lives. We both have different friends, we're pursueing different careers but we have this amazing bond. We;re crazy about one another, and miss each other even when its only been 2 days. Strangely enough she is also capible of driving me nuts and making me really frustrated. We argue a hell of a lot, but mostly only because we can't agree and we're both too stubborn to give in, even though halfway through the conversation we both realise that none of us was making sense. Last week I spotted her holding hands and being really close with this guy twice. Apparently everyone know that she's dating this guy, except for me. She kept this from me. I don't understand and for some reason i feel really hurt. If shes happy she should share this with me. I'm her best friend! Whats big in her life is important in mine too. I feel lost and very hurt.
2007-05-23 21:49:08 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
she hasnt been neglecting me. We still spend time together and have a great time. Its just i don't understanf why she okay with everyone else knowing but keeps it from me. She had many chances to tell me. I know she goes to see him from other people we know, But when i asked about what she did like say yesterday she would lie about it and say "i just stayed home" or "i went to the movies with so and so" but "so and so" happened to be working same shift with me. I'm okay with her having a boyfriend, I think its cute and she's a very nice girl. I don't see why she is hiding it from me, and hiding it from just me. I feel kinda hurt because i thought she'll go crazy and can't wait to tell me all about it. I'm not suppose to know for some reason i really can't think of. I don't want her to think i'm spying on her or something so I'm waiting for her to tell me. It hurts me when she feel she can't tell me things, and especially something significant like this.
2007-05-23 23:03:58 · update #1
the fact that she found ways to keep it from me, makes me a bit hesitant about asking bout it. I don't want to make her uncomfortable and for things to go awkard. We're great friends for sure and i know she cares, I just don't want this to "thing" to harm our friendship, which i have a feeling it will.
2007-05-23 23:26:26 · update #2
Well as her best friend, I would just ask her. Tell her that you've heard from other people that she's been seeing this guy and you want to know why she's been keeping it a secret from you? I would be hurt too because thats the one thing best friends can share with each other and for her to keep that from you and only you makes no sense. Tell her that your happy for her but upset that she didn't include you in that happiness. Maybe she thinks you'll get jealous, because sometimes that does happen. It'll all work itself out though so don't worry, but you have to talk about it in order for that to happen. Or else your going to sit around and wait for her to tell you and wonder why its taken her son long. So communicate and talk it out! Good luck!
2007-05-31 14:57:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Angela--there comes a time when all girls and boys move on to dating and relationships--why and when is a matter of personal development and maturity. Everyone had close friends--and there came a time to separate and go along with what ever life had in store for them. That's what is happening to you two--so she had a boy to be interested in--it is only normal--and when you get a boy--you will also see less of her---friends don't always have to be together constantly--it is a bond that is always there despite the frequency of seeing each other. relax--this is just nature. Hurt??? She is probably torn between you and this guy--so she is a little hurt too. Give her a break and wish her well---be happy for her. She is still your friend--so back off--ease up--get a grip---get some new friends----get a hobby. .......do something to fill the void.
2007-05-23 21:58:08 · answer #2 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
u knw whn 2 best friends shares everything n spend lots of time 2gether..thn it will almost be like a couple relationship..n whn u found out she hav a bf thn u feel betrayed or things will nvr be the same no more.. probably tats y she don't wanna tell you...she's afraid that u mite think that she's gonna spend more time with her bf rather thn with u..mayb she thinks keeping it as a secret will not change what u 2 had n hav.. but if u reli wanna knw y she din tell u bout it u shud ask her..For every action has its own reason..im sure thr's a reason she kept that part frm u
2007-05-23 23:07:49 · answer #3 · answered by easterbunnie 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
initially, you may desire to diminish back off and allow him run his very own existence. i'm making of venture his mom replaced into a similar way, that's what led to him to advance as much as be the spineless coward that he's now. 2nd step, he desires to advance a pair and get up for himself. If he won't, there is not any longer something you, me, or absolutely everyone else can do approximately it.
2016-11-26 22:27:08 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Oh... wow. Well, I assume that she was afraid to tell you for some reason unknown to me right now >.<". Um... I would have probably done what you're doing now if I found out (Wait for her to tell me)... I have a tendency to do that for a lot of situations I get in and it never actually helps me at all XD.
"If you really want to know why she kept it from you, I think you should calmly ask her to hang out or go to your house or hers and remember to mention to her that something is bothering you and you want to tell her. When you do start telling her the exact problem that is bothering you, tell her, as you said before, that you weren't spying on her, you just happened to see. Explain your feelings and then I guess you should wait for her to respond...but remember, don't make her look like the bad guy and make it fair so she doesn't get mad or offended."
"I hope my 14-year-old advice helps and does good for something! ^___^"
-Shaii
2007-05-24 00:23:44 · answer #5 · answered by Shaii 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Dear Friend...
I think she might have got scared about the consequences of breaking the news of loving another fellow after spending so much and nice time with you.
I my view she didn't want to hurt her best friend, which I guess you are hers, thats why she might have supressed this information so that you might not feel duped or dumped by her.
She is truly your best friend because a best friend can care so much.
Take Care
Hare Krsna
2007-05-23 21:55:19 · answer #6 · answered by keep_smiling_n_be_happy 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why are you asking us? You should be asking her. Maybe she just forgot. Maybe she did not feel that it was important. Maybe she is waiting to see if something develops from it. there could be other reasons. Talk to her, and ask her what is up. Don't jump on to her. Just say something like this--"Hey, I notice that you were getting pretty chummy with that guy the other day. You never told me anything about him. What's up with him?
2007-05-23 21:56:22 · answer #7 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
there must have bin a reason why she didnt tell u do you not like most of her boy friends because she probalbly really liked this guy and wanted to be with him im not saying that you must have bin stoping her but you need to confront her and say well why didnt you tell me you had a man tell her you totally respect her choice of who she wants to be with
good luck
2007-05-31 10:19:00 · answer #8 · answered by *~♥h0lliiwo0d♥~* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest and just say you saw her with the guy and that other people have mentioned him to you and that you dont understand why she never shared that with you. That is not spying it is discovering by accident.
2007-05-23 23:21:03 · answer #9 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe she just haven't a chance to tell you, or she think you'll be jealous and acting the way you're acting right now.
You're right... you should be happy about her dating someone, why don't you show it? tease her & find something to argue.
Best friend back up each other, right?
2007-05-23 22:06:20 · answer #10 · answered by ordinary1 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋