Im writing a poem on deception and it goes....
I can see with closed eyes
Through the window of deception
Your mouth is open
But I hear no words
Your expression is as fake as....
Closing my eyes
I journey to the window of your thoughts
The glass is cracked
My trust is shattered
The horrors deception brings
Your laughter
Your smile
Your voice
They all lead me to that break
When I used to talk to you
Light shined through the window
The glass was pure
Your words were true
All I wish is that I can go through that glass
What is there I cannot see?
What happened?
now as you can see one line is incomplete. your expression is as fake as... can u fill it in?
and please help! i hope you like this piece and please give me some feedback and that line is bothering me!
2007-05-23 12:19:53 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
yea nice try dogs shampoo im not falling for that dumb copied and pasted line of yours.
2007-05-23 12:53:21 · update #1
Your expression is as fake as happiness.
2007-05-23 12:26:34 · answer #1 · answered by Baby Brat 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as fake as a mirror image.
as fake as a lie
as fake as an illusion
as fake as a drawn image
your poem is good. I hope this give you some ideas or helps in some way.
2007-05-23 19:27:44 · answer #2 · answered by Ginnykitty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are a genius. The contextural counterpoints that you achieve form a secondary narrative within the work which provides a juxtaposition of viewpoints for the reader depending on his or her internal dialogue. Very impressive.
2007-05-23 19:24:26 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
jI Don't Want to be Your Fool
You don't think I notice
Your out of place, causing space between us
It's silly I thought you knew what you said
The blank looks, half-dead bedhead
I'm not your dummy, a puppet on a string
To do your doing, to think for you
Flake out, reject, not much left to say
I don't want you, your gifts, your false love
Except goodbye, good ridence
Never again
I was a fool to believe every word you said
I don't want to be your dummy
I don't want your smiles
It kinda seems funny
That I used to call you "Honey"
It's unbelievable
Inconceivable
That I let you
Make a Fool of me
------ here is a similar for you-- good job!
2007-05-23 20:08:28 · answer #4 · answered by faista 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your expression as false as a mannequin... Just a thought
2007-05-23 19:23:39 · answer #5 · answered by Sarah D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋