I'm a stay at home mom of four kids. I do feel that it's my job to do all the housework but I just need a break! I work 24/7 for over a decade now. I do all the yardwork, taking care of the kids, housework, bills, you name it and I'm in college full time to get my degree, oh and I homeschool the kids. It is starting to bug me when friends and my husband included get to relax on their days off but I never have one. This may sound like just a bunch of complaining but after 14 years without a day off I'm getting burned out. It's affecting my moods, I just dont' want to do all this for a day or two. We can't afford a vacation, not even a small one. I'm not the type to go get my nails or hair done, besides that would cost money. What's something free I can do for a day where I can seriously just relax?
2007-05-23 11:02:22 · 9 answers · asked by fourzenuff 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I know how this is and I have had to deal with this situation.
Are all of the kids old enough to spend the night and friends houses? For those that are, contact their friends parents that they might normally spend the night at and see if they would be able to have them spend the night. If there are some that are not at that age where they can spend the night talk to a relative and see if they can help out. The point is to get rid of the kids at places you know you can trust and will be able to put them out of mind.
Next step: Make sure the house is clean BEFORE you do anything. If it isnt, it is all you will think about while you are trying to have fun.
Since it is you that needs the time, you decide what level of participation you try to get from your husband. Based on what you are saying, I say go it alone.
At this point it doesnt matter what you do. You can go to the library and sit and read a good book, go home and eat something you like, not stuff the kids like and watch a movie that you like (not cartoon network, remember the kids are gone).
You dont have to do it exactly like this but you get the idea.
2007-05-23 12:32:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you know any other stay at home moms around you? You could trade babysitting for the day and just go home take a bath read a book that you have been wanting to get around to and just relax and take a nap!
You could do the same thing for her once in awhile as well.
If you do everything then you and your hubby need to have a talk and really soon. He can take something off of your back for you. Yard work for example. You work and go to school and he just gets to sit around after he puts in his 40 hours at the office that is NOT FAIR to you!! Eventhough you do not get a paycheck yet you are definatley working for a living. You need to remind him of that. He has 2 days off a week from work. Tell him that his next day off you are going out and he can take over for a little while. Then go to the park or your community pool or just go window shopping and don't come home until it is dinner time. Then eat (make sure he cooks and cleans up) and go take a nice bath while he puts the kids to bed. Better yet spend the night with a close family member or a friend and stay up all night with them just talking and catching up!
One full day in your shoes and he will be much more appreciative of what you do everyday.
2007-05-23 11:16:11 · answer #2 · answered by hotelmajor 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That does sound like a stressful one. First, make her aware of your stress, reassure her you love her more then anything and want to be able to provide. That she has to understand your stress levels and career focus. Finding a job for people these days are hard, and she needs to understand that. If she can't understand that, then a marriage is really out of the question for her. She needs to be understanding and stick with you through thick and thin. Remind her you are still the same guy, you are just stressed out. Because you are, though when people are under stress they do act different and are more of a drone then anything. And what you need to do is lighten up, you don't need to spend money to have a good time with her, take her for a romantic picnic, costs virtually nothing and it shows her you do really care, have some wine, nice foods, and reconnect and have a laugh. You could also save your dimes and take her to a theme park, just have some fun! - hope that helped, good luck!
2016-04-01 04:47:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, I'm not trying to be mean but. You teach people how to treat you. You've been letting it go on for so long, and haven't made your husband do much of anything. What do you expect?
Put your foot down, I'm a stay at home mom, But my husband has chores like the dishes, I never touch a dish in my house. I do most of the cooking. I do the chores that I don't mind doing, and he does the chores that he doesn't mind doing. Your husband needs to pamper you. after all you deserve it.
2007-05-23 11:22:41 · answer #4 · answered by K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Rent a room at the holiday inn, just for you....
Find a book club or movie club that meets once a month for a few hours....
Get a massage once a month...
Teach your children to do some of that danged housework!!!...
Buy a Greyhound bus pass, take a bag of sandwiches, and sit on a bus for a few days...
Have a room in the house that is just for you, one where you can close the door....
Learn to delegate...
Have that husband do the yard work....
(just a few suggestions)
2007-05-23 11:19:37 · answer #5 · answered by Brent 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A bath will help, or the swimming pool if you can afford it. If you need silence and calm, go to the library. they have things to read you have wanted to catch up with for years.... the donald duck? the cartoons in the paper? the recipies you've always wanted? or maybe a book about relaxation? :) after a few hours you will definitely feel better :)
2007-05-23 11:11:47 · answer #6 · answered by freebird31wizard 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you get together with some of your girlfriends at one of their houses & have a bit of a girly weekend/day out of your house? (Stay the night at your friend's house).
You and each of your girlfriends could each bring a few nibblies, and just any girly fun stuff you have at home already such as foot spas, nail polish, manicure kits, hair tools (curling wand, hair straightener etc.).
That's what I would do. And it wouldn't cost anything because you'd be staying at a friend's house & just taking whatever you have laying around at your house.
Take care and have a nice time :)
2007-05-23 11:39:42 · answer #7 · answered by tomorrow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just declare that next tuesday will be your day and the hubby needs to take care of your business on that day period,no arguments no B.S. just go to a park and lay on the grass and watch the clouds one may look like the life you want and need...........
2007-05-23 12:05:11 · answer #8 · answered by skirickfiftyone 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Long, candlelit, reading bubble baths got me through some hard times.
2007-05-23 11:07:46 · answer #9 · answered by Happy Wife 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋