my wife always give me the kids and last night she said that why she give them to me because when she was younger she had to watch her brothers and some other little kids. and she said that she needed a break from our kids thats y she give them to me..and here is another 1 also... i also do all the washing and load and unload the dishes. my wife said that she did it soo much when she was growing up she need a break from doing it.....what do you think i should do about it??we are both 24 years old,been marry for 4 years.we have 2 kids... please help
2007-05-23 09:08:48 · 17 answers · asked by calcutta200224 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would tell her to grow up. Welcome to LIFE!!!
2007-05-23 09:14:53 · answer #1 · answered by Amy L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's making pretty crappy excuses, if you ask me. She's just lazy. Tell her she's not the only one who had a rough time growing up, and plenty of people had it worse and do more than she has to. How much of a break does she need? If she needed a break that bad, she should've waited longer to get married and have kids. Tell her to grow up, act like an adult, help take responsibility for the kids and the cleaning and all the other things she is making excuses to not do.
2007-05-23 09:17:55 · answer #2 · answered by misguidedrose18 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time for her to share the work. Whatever she did in her past, well you aren't supposed to suffer because of it.
Ask her to increase her contribution a little bit at a time. It's going to take time for her to get into the swing of helping more.
Is she at home with the kids during the day? Maybe that's why she wants you to take them for a few hours at night.
Try doing things together with the kids. EVERYBODY read the bedtime story together. Everybody help with the dishes, even the little ones.
Just make sure that you aren't forgetting her workload, or thinking she does less than she does.
2007-05-23 09:14:59 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your wife is full of crap. There's nothing wrong with you watching the kids, but they are her responsibility as well as yours. There's also nothing wrong with you helping out around the house, but not for the reasons she's giving you. Tell this woman that you're not going to be her whipping boy. You're no longer going to do all the washing and you're not going to take over her responsibilities as a wife. If she continues this controlling behavior, you may need to rethink your marriage.
2007-05-23 09:31:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used to take care of my sisters, clean my house, and cook while I was growing up. Im 20, married, with 2 beautiful kids and I cook, clean, and work a full time job. My husband also helps out. I dont think she is being reasonable enough to help you. She has taken advantage of you doing everything. Talk to her and let her know you need her help too. Does she work at all?
2007-05-23 09:14:44 · answer #5 · answered by Latina4life 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in reference to the dish thing, if she does something else that you don't have to do than i wouldn't worry about it, for example my husband does laundry and I was our dogs and the bathrooms and if he cooks i wash dishes and if i cook he washed dishes as far as the kids, if she needs a break every now and then fine, but if it's like everyday i would say that you both made the decision to have the kids so she can't always have a break
2007-05-23 09:27:20 · answer #6 · answered by crys 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her if she wanted a "break" she should have stayed on birth control. Now that she has kids it's too late to talk about "breaks". Both of you guys need to pull your share of the load.
2007-05-23 09:30:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that you will take a turn and thenshe can have one...tell her that you may not have grown up babysitting and doing all the chores but for the last 4 years you have and now YOU need a break.
2007-05-23 09:12:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Regardles of what her life was like before she needs to do her share of the work. Tell her you need to have a life partner that will help out more often. This is what marriage is, she needs to step-up. Try dividing things up, and don't pick up the slack if she fails to complete her chores.
2007-05-23 09:14:43 · answer #9 · answered by Maria b 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on what you both do during the day. There's a division of labour in any relationship, it's up to both parties to make sure there's balance. Things need to be done, and the past is no excuse.
2007-05-23 10:33:41 · answer #10 · answered by Unicornrider 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she needs to grow up and realize what it is to be an adult. I took care of siblings and had chores to do, but know that I am equally responsible for taking care of my house & children.
2007-05-23 09:13:26 · answer #11 · answered by linda m 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋