we have fallen out and she is poisoning my nieces and nephews against me and mine. she lives near me and is goading me with the children. they are either ignoring us or being disrespectful. they are all under 16 and have always loved me. she and my brother are not great parents.
2007-05-23 09:04:52 · 17 answers · asked by serendipity3 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
I don't know
2007-05-23 09:07:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can empathise with you it's a really bad idea to live near any relative especially where children are involved. Exactly the same thing happened to me many years ago and it resulted in us having to move as things got really bad for my own children as the SFH tried to set my own children and hers against us both. Horrible episode.
I'm not suggesting that you resort to such drastic measures though what I would do I would take this DEAR SOUL to one side and have it out with her for once and for all. Other wise it will have effect your health and your nieces and nephews will begin to think that they have done something wrong.
I hope things become easier for you and that you can at least get back on speaking terms with SFH if only for the childrens sake. You can chose your friends but not your family ...lumbered with her ...but not in her pocket remember.
I guess it is a lot more involved but you now what you have to do now don't you.
2007-05-23 09:13:45 · answer #2 · answered by oranges and lemons 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
one thing to do is to figure out what your part in this is. Why does the sister-in-law hate you so? Is it possible that there might be a grain of truth behind her feelings?
Don't get me wrong---I'm not taking sides here. I'm not saying she's right. But...
somewhere, somehow, it's likely that she has a point. some sort of point. big or small.
to approach her, you need to surrender to that point. the way to start that discussion is "I wish things hadn't happened that way." Then you talk about how the alienation from your neices/nephews is making you lonely, and ask how/what you can do to fix it.
put your pride aside.
good--luck
Brian
e-me if you like
bye
2007-05-23 09:13:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
oh boy oh boy do i ever know how you feel! maybe tell her she is acting very immature and it will eventually all come back on her...big time! tell her whatever issues she has with you she should bring it up with you and stop being a child herself and trying to turn the children against you like that. the children will eventully see who is right and who is wrong.
its really stupid though is'nt it? life's hard enough without that mess....
maybe she feels insecure,lonely,unloved or accepted,maybe something from her childhood.maybe she needs to feel more included and she feels bad about herself. i don't know her like you do ofcourse but that could be it partly.
2007-05-23 09:12:20 · answer #4 · answered by CJ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try and sort things out with her. It might be hard but it will be better in the long run! You don't want to lose contact with your nieces/nephews after all.
2007-05-23 09:07:48 · answer #5 · answered by AJay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its ok saying put aside your pride, but what kind of woman are you dealing with here, you've fallen out and she's pathetic enough to use the children against you, and we wonder why society is the way it is when you got those kind of mothers, and your brothers condoning this, best of out of it they'll need you before you need them, obviously don't ignore the children speak to them at every opportunity you get, they will miss you soon enough and see reason ok.
2007-05-23 10:23:32 · answer #6 · answered by DeViL..^--^~~ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Need more details. what caused the bust up to start.
By the sound of it you criticised the way she was bringing up her kids?? Look hard at yourself and think who is losing out. Leave your pride in the cupboard and right or wrong, go and apologise.
2007-05-23 09:35:45 · answer #7 · answered by Harly Q 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask Dr Phil
2007-05-23 09:09:25 · answer #8 · answered by Ms Scarlet 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have about 3 choices of what to do.
You can be nice and act like nothing happened.
You can try to patch things up.
You can act like you don't give a rat's behind and ignore them too.
2007-05-23 09:08:43 · answer #9 · answered by nowyouknow 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mmm this one is hard. I would talk to my bro and complain about his wife. That is what i have done in the past. He listens says somthing to her and then we are fine for a few months and then she is at me again and then i say somthing again. Sister in laws are hard sometimes.
2007-05-23 09:10:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My grandma always told us to "kill em with kindness." I have a horrible sister in law as well, but I just continue to be nice to her no matter what...within reason. Pray for her to change as well as your brother. Their kids need prayer as well. Good luck and God bless.
2007-05-23 09:09:50 · answer #11 · answered by flicka 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋