Is marriage just a piece of paper?

Question

Is there a difference being in a relationship and living with someone and having a baby and actually signing the marriage papers? Does getting married change anything other than financial issues?

Thank you all for the very insightful and helpful answers.

Btw, I have no child yet but hope to someday soon.

Answer 1

Yes, marriage is just a paper. But an important paper. After you get married, not only is it important for you and your kids someday if something happens to your husband. But after getting married and saying your vows and meaning them it just feels different, like living together forever is important and you have recognized it on paper before a minister or notary. Its a feeling of really becoming ONE with each other. And it will always make your children feel happier that you loved each other to make it legal. Good luck

Answer 2

I use to think that way too, before I got married. We lived together for quite some time, I kept telling him that it was only a piece of paper, we were committed to each other, we didn't need to get married. But it is something more than a piece of paper, it is a total life commitment, you are vowing that you will be with only this person. It is kind of intimidating. But it was the best decision I've ever made. I know no matter what I say or do, he is there, same for him. I know that in 20 years I will still be picking up after him, he will be the person I see when I wake up, he's the one who holds me each night. It is different, but not in a bad way, its a good thing.

Answer 3

I always like this question. When people say getting married is just a piece of paper, OK. So lets agree with your statement and turn it around, if it has no meaning then just do it right. Oh....wait a minute... um....well......
Most people who say that are looking for reason to not get married. Which is fine, they should just say the actual reason related to their unique situation. Again funny how people say lets have a broad general discussion to avoid the details of my situation.
So getting married does mean something. There a various parts, legal, religious, spiritual, emotional, financal, social, life long commitment.
From a practical point, I would say there is a big difference in that marrige is a sign of commitment. In a live in relationship it is common for the woman to greatly over estimate the commitment level of the man.

Answer 4

This is a good question. My exboyfriend and I lived together for seven years. I never trusted him to pay my rent. I only asked him to keep food in the house. At the end of 7 years, we didn't grow or accomplish anything as a couple. Never discussed buying a house, marriage or anything that reflects a progresive couple. I don't know if marriage would have changed anything. Seven years after the breakup I'm glad I never married him because I would be labeled a divorcee.
Single and proud until the right person walks into my life.

Answer 5

Marriage is what you make it--it you want to look at it as solely a financial arrangement, then that's what it will be for you.

Marriage is about sharing, and building, a life with someone. Some might argue that you can do that without getting married---but marriage is a committment. Marriage says, "I choose you to grow old with; I choose you to raise a family with".

Now there are no guarantees in life, with or without a spouse; and with or without children--but I would rather be married than not. My husband is the one person who I know has my back, and I have his, too.

Answer 6

Legally, for you and your children, marriage is more than a piece of paper. Without being married you or your husband can bail out on the other with no consequences. When someone says "mariage is just a piece of paper" they are trying to get the milk without buying the cow.

Answer 7

I lived with my boyfriend 10 years, we have a 9 year old son , and just got married a year ago.
I was fine at first with living together but when my son started school it just seemed like something was missing ..I would have to sign my last name when his was different. I started to feel left out, like I wasn't a part of them..
As far as feeling different after marriage, we had been together for so long it felt the same , but I did feel like a complete family , my son was so proud.. that alone i knew I had made the right choice.I hope your choice is the best for you ..good luck:)

Answer 8

Yes, marriage is just a paper. But an important paper. After you get married, not only is it important for you and your kids someday if something happens to your husband. But after getting married and saying your vows and meaning them it ,its a bonding for each other but most important its for your kids as when they go to school they ask for parents name ? its the affection of each other to live for the sake at least for the kids if marriage has some problem,living together is not that easy in this fast forward world one has to sacrifice ones Eco and live happily together.

Answer 9

Well that largely depends on your value system. There are some practical differences in taxes, the rights of estate and even items like medical choices etc. Marriage is as old as man and there are a lot of great reasons to commit to someone for life, make vows before the state and God etc. Its moral and its actually quite great :)

Answer 10

Marriage is the only way a guy stays committed ( atleast for a slightly longer period of time). Otherwise he will continue shopping for the 'Miss Right' forever :)
When you live with someone its easier to patch things up if you have a fight. Its nice to feel like ' This is my family'