My ex husband and I have been divorced for a few months but still have some legal things to unravel. He calls me from time to time and we talk about how things are going but sometimes the conversation gets ugly and I get upset. My boyfriend knows that I have to talk with my ex sometimes but I dont want to keep bringing up his name in front of him....I think he is uncomfortable with it all. Should I even tell him that I talked to my ex or just keep things open?
2007-05-22 09:53:16 · 19 answers · asked by Kelly 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If talking to your boyfriend about it helps you deal with the stress of the situation AND your boyfriend is ok with it, then talk about it.
If it's not something your boyfriend wants to hear about, then find a good girlfriend, sister, mom, etc to vent to. There's really no need to let your boyfriend know when you talk to your ex, unless of course you're feeling guilty about something (unresolved feelings, or maybe you have some twisted desire for your boyfriend to be jealous...)
2007-05-22 09:57:42 · answer #1 · answered by Courtney 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't talk about your ex husband in front of your boyfriend unless is has to do with the kids (if you two share any) or legal issues. This doesn't make for a good relationship with your current boyfriend. He may feel like you still have feelings for your ex, eventhough he's your ex. You getting upset sometimes after talking to the ex also says that. I have an ex and nothing he says to me even bothers me anymore. In one ear and out the other. It's as simple as hanging up a phone. Let the legal issues be hashed out in court. There's no reason you and him need to discuss anything. If there's a dispute, take it to court. As you said, there are LEGAL issues.
Your boyfriend I'm sure isn't real thrilled to hear his name so don't put your boyfriend in a bad spot. He doesn't need to know about every single phone call that's made between you and the ex. But like I said, if it's legal issues, then take care of it in court. Don't drag an old relationship into your new one.
2007-05-22 16:59:26 · answer #2 · answered by glittereyedg 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He is your ex HUSBAND and he is your current BOY FRIEND. There is no requirement for you to tell him any thing about you conversations with your ex. You will probably talk about because it is what is going on your your life. But, there is no need to feel pressure to tell him everything.
2007-05-22 17:00:09 · answer #3 · answered by Willie J 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honesty is the best policy. I'd try to keep the references to your ex a minimum, but when things bother you then you need to bring them up. Just make sure your boyfriend knows the real story about where he stands in your heart. It is part of everyday life, people have to learn to deal with those types of things. Jealousy is something everyone has to overcome.
2007-05-22 17:02:01 · answer #4 · answered by Glen G 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
keep things open, you dont want to hide anything from your boyfriend. always try to be open and transparent, cuz im sure you would want the same. if he truely loves you, he'll understand that you're not tryin to make him jealous or uncomfortable, but just dealing with those things you need to unravel. honesty is essential in any relationship. =)
2007-05-22 17:02:19 · answer #5 · answered by sharstar 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you and your boyfriend need to talk about this. and ask him what do u thing when my ex husband call how dose it make u feel. I'm sure he understand the situation. and I'm sure when u get the legal stuff worked out u won't talk to each other that much. unless u have kids than that's how it will be. U have to communicate when u have kids. good luck and i hope everything work out. hang in there.
2007-05-22 17:00:10 · answer #6 · answered by angel 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
No you shouldn't have to tell your boyfriend about calls you have with your ex. They have nothing to do with your boyfriend and are basically none of his business anyway.
2007-05-22 17:33:55 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would tell him just in case he finds out later ... then he will think you hid something from him when it really was innocent. Would be really hard to explain it then.
Plus if the calls upset you ... let your boyfriend be there for you.
2007-05-22 16:57:37 · answer #8 · answered by NoSurrender 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You kept the affair with your boyfriend from your husband so turn about is fair play.
2007-05-22 16:59:02 · answer #9 · answered by bluemist 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honesty and communication. Pretend he was in your shoes would you want to know... you dont have to go into any detail. You could say.____my ex called me today. I want you to know but not want to hide anything from you. I will tell you if you want i just dont want him to become the center topic of converstation
2007-05-22 16:58:42 · answer #10 · answered by GA 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋