My husband and I are debating on having another baby. Our third. We already have a 4 1/2 yr old and a two year old, oldest is a girl, youngest is a boy. I am at the point that I want to have another baby, and if we are going to do it, it needs to be soon, so the children aren't so spread apart in age. I want to concieve in August/September, to have a summer baby, which will put my youngest at 3 yrs old. I'm completely excited about it... but my husband isn't so much. He wants some reasons we should have a 3rd, and my mind goes blank. I have a million reasons to, but I can't seem to spit them out when he asks me why! I need help. Do you guys have any good reasons a 3rd baby would be a good idea? We've talked to the family and our other children, and everyone is excited about the idea, but my husband, not so much. And he is the important one! Any good reasons that I can give him?
2007-05-22 03:44:18 · 9 answers · asked by Cosmetologist_momma_of_2 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
I am pregnant with my third and have a 6 year old boy and a 2 year old girl. My husband and I discussed it and thought about it for a few months before we tried for another. We also waited until my home day care got off the ground so I had a way to stay home and have extra income for a third child. The only thing that I wish I would have done different is to have had my 2 yr old potty trained before I got pregnant. I am now trying to potty train her before the baby gets here, and it's not going too well. If I were you, I would wait about 6 months or so and give yourself and your family time to think about it. If you and your husband decide you might want to start trying for a third, it might help to start talking about it with your other children, just to prepare them a little. Start out subtle for a while until you are for sure pregnant, then you can talk more about it. Make sure that everyone who will be involved in this, will be ready to deal with it. It will be a major change, maybe not for you, but others may think so. Give your husband a little time. Every once in a while bring it up when he is in a good mood, but don't get pushy. Maybe try making a list of all the good reasons why you want another baby and slowly tell him the reasons over time. This worked with my husband and he is now very excited to be a daddy again! Good luck.
2007-05-22 03:58:59 · answer #1 · answered by iamjoesmamma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if your husband does not want a third one, and you do then it is going to be hard on the marriage.Why do you want a third child? Is it because you think the more kids you have the better chance he will stay with you? You did not tell us the reasons.Three children are going to be hard. At least with 2 one can take one, and one take the other. Financially it is going to be more as well. You got to ask yourself all of these questions. It is alot of responsibility. Are all the people excited about a new baby going to be able to pay all the medical needs, college tuition, unexpected expenses?? Just make sure you are really wanting a baby for all the right reasons.
2007-05-22 10:52:52 · answer #2 · answered by Heather D 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe you should ask him his reasons for not wanting a 3rd child? Does he feel your family is complete with the two children you already have? Do you think he'll be open-minded to listen why you don't believe your family is complete yet?
Your best bet is simply to sit down and discuss it with him. Ask him what his "cons" to having another child are, so you can address his concerns about it.
2007-05-22 10:54:27 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are financially stable, have the physical space, love, time and support, you shouldn't need a reason to bring more children into the home.
Tell your husband to give you reasons NOT to have a third.
I love kids - I would have bunches if I was physically and financially able. Best of Luck!
2007-05-22 11:05:06 · answer #4 · answered by buggerhead 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Poohs House.
That Baby ache is just there, you cant reason with it, you just feel it. And I had the same thing. But my third pregnancy was twins. And I wondered, if after they were born, if someday that ache would return. It didnt, and I feel complete. Sometimes, you just FEEL it.
(Then again, my new hubby is aching for another baby, and I am just no so sure. Oh the wonders of marriage!!)
2007-05-22 10:54:42 · answer #5 · answered by sweetie_baby 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The only answer for me was that our family didn't feel complete. I just knew that I wasn't done yet - that "baby ache" was still there and when I'd look around the dinner table, it seemed like someone was missing. After our 4th child was born, we knew we were finished. Now I know my family is complete - and the "baby ache" has gone away for good! ^_^
2007-05-22 10:51:22 · answer #6 · answered by poohs_house67 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I do not recommend a third child.
Personally. Prove to him that you
have the money/time/resources to
raise it. Show him how you can save
for it's college as well as the other two
and still save for your retirement.
And how you will handle taking care of
three without neglecting anything you're already doing.
one more chance to do it right.
a chance to have the perfect child
one more human that might cure cancer?
2007-05-22 10:49:06 · answer #7 · answered by Sufi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just explain you love being a mother, and that he is a wonderful father - and that the two of you have more love to share and give. Quit talking to your family and kids about this, though!
2007-05-22 11:06:44 · answer #8 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No
2007-05-22 10:46:47 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋