Why is my husband so jealous of my best friend?

Question

I have one true friend aside from my husband, we have been friends for 13 years. She is the one person I can talk to about anything, including my husband. When I mention my friends name my hubby gets all huffy and says I should marry her.
I lead a very secluded life, I stay home all day then go to work at night while my husband stays home with our 4 kids. We have absolutely no social life what so ever. My friend is my link to the outside world, I just don't understand why he is so jealous. Any help on this appreciated.

Answer 1

He's probably jealous because he doesn't have a true friend like that!! He probably feels that your closer to her to talk to then him. Maybe if after you have a conversation with your friend then you should discuss it with your husband after so he feels more involved. Maybe he feels a little left out.

Answer 2

Why don't you sit down and discuss this with your husband and try to find out why he feels this way. He may not realize some of his feelings himself so it would be good if you two can work this out between the two of you. And you need to explain to him that all women, married or otherwise, have good friends that they talk to regularly and they go shopping together when they can and share recipes.... etc etc

If you and your husband aren't spending much time together with the work schedules you have, you may want to work on doing special things together once in a while so he isn't feeling so put out.

Cook him his favorite dinner and occasionally, the two of you need to go on a date. Maybe the friend can watch the kids for you so you can do an overnight trip somewhere and put a little spark in your marriage.

Leave little love notes somewhere where he can find them, send him a love card in the mail every once in a while to remind him how special he is to you.

Good luck to you. Hope you can get the issue resolved but unless you talk it out, neither of you will know where the other one is coming from :)

Answer 3

He is acting this way because he is insecure, and is afraid of losing you. So he wants to be the only person in your life. He probably would rather that you didn't even go to work, right? But you guys need the money so he has allowed this. There are no easy solutions to this problem, sweetie. Your husband is insecure, and it will take years to build up his self confidence. Only you can decide if a project like that is worth it.

Answer 4

For whatever reason he probably feel's that she is a threat to your marriage.He obviously has some insecurities that seriously need to be addressed as soon as possible..You need to talk to your husband and find out what his issues are with your friend.Explain to him how important he is in your life but your friend is also very important to you.Jealousy & insecurity can ruin a marriage or any relationship for that matter..Is your husband controlling because if he is that is a big problem in itself,if that is the case then he has problems with the fact that he cannot control your friend..I suggest that you sit down and talk to him and make it very clear that your friend is not going anywhere and he need's to accept her in your life..Just because you are married does not mean that you have to stop being your own person..Good Luck & Best Wishes..

Answer 5

He is a little bit jealous. But if you wanna remain with him and consider him your best friend then talk to him.
Tell him and show him that he is your best friend, then comes your female friend.
Talk to him and ask him if he don't like then you can leave this friendship. Obviously dear he won't be so bad that he ll tell you to end your friendship. But just to give him more confidence and trust in you, talk to him and ask. He himself will want you to continue your friendship.
I hope this will work.

Answer 6

I hope you don't mind me speaking my mind.

I think you have on hand a controlling guy. By showing jealousy, he is trying to force you into backing down from your convictions and leaving your friends. Please don't listen to him. Continue to keep in touch with her and also, with your family. Familial relations are important, so if anything happens, they can look out for you.

Please pay attention to your husband's behavior. If he continues to behave this way, talk to him. If he gets physical or threatening, immediately get away.

Sorry to frighten you like this but I've read one too many advice columns. Do let us on Answers know the situation in a while, okay?(:

Answer 7

because when u married your hubby that day he became your best freind not her. She should be your second best friend lol! [so 6th grade] but sounds like oyur man wants to be your link to the outside world and wants to talk to you maore often. Tell u what have a date night.When he gets "pouty" no kids, friend on hold, great dinner movie and raunchy SX. Do it up use costumes, and massages trust me he wont be jealous. Let him know you are my best friend by catering to him. He will love it

Answer 8

He doesn't want you to have a link to the outside world. He wants to control you completely, and as long as you still have that one friend, he won't. You need to make some more friends and show him that you are not his possession.

Answer 9

I'm with the others on this. Seclusion is a control freaks' friend.
Seclusion, getting uptight about having friends, etc.....control freaks and abuser's friend...
Hell, I'm surprised you're allowed to go to work..

Answer 10

Sounds like he is possive. I'd be going out for coffee, lunch with your friend but be transparent about it. Maybe you and your husband should have a date night.