I knew my husband since we were kids & we had an on off relationship,then i moved anyway & didnt see him for years,i was involved in a accident & received money,the next time i met him after about 4 years we clicked,he then moved away with me,he had no work & i started dipping into my money we spent about £25000 as the rest was in a fixed account that i couldnt get thank god!now we are married with 2 kids & building a house with the help of my dad,my husband seems to think that i should take money out of bank again,the house is gonna cost us about £20000 to build & my dad wants us to just pay him bit by bit when we have it but my husband refuses to save,he earns £580 a week gives me money for grocery shopping & he keeps the rest,i dont work as have 2 kids 8 months & 2.he has even told me on a few occasions that he has no money & i went through his pockets & found money,is he just using me
2007-05-21 23:37:51 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Maybe your dad should be confronting him about how much he can afford to make in payments. This might wake him up to the fact that it's his responsibilty as much as yours to pay for your new home.
2007-05-22 02:44:23 · answer #1 · answered by 24Special 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should be paying your Dad something for helping you. That your husband says he has no money and refuses to save says he is either spending like crazy or hiding money from you.
In regard to is he just using you, its hard to say as he is supporting you and the kids with his job.
I would sit him down and have a serious talk about finances and what you think needs to be done. He needs to take into account the amount you spent over the years when he was not working and that you are raising the children.
If I were him, I would feel obligated to pay your Dad but that's me and my sense of doing the right thing.
2007-05-22 07:06:04 · answer #2 · answered by Ker Plunk 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My daughter just went through that with her husband: she went through exactly that. She gave him three months to get a job and straighten out his act. She kept everything in her name, all things that contained money, he couldn't touch anything.
It was touch and go for a long time. He got the job all right but, he kept getting warning slips and suspended. She found out he was telling every one at work this was only temporary, etc. he was making arraignments on the side for other side games.
Without saying anything she quietly packed her bags and moved out, closed all her accounts and took up residents in another place, he came home to an empty home. He said he expected it if she found out. All their friends laughed at him.
He's alone now, he's working still, for the first time in five years but, he has to. She has a new boy friend, one that appreciates her and loves her for being her.
2007-05-22 07:09:23 · answer #3 · answered by cowboydoc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does he pay all the bills also or are you the one paying bills out of savings ? Tell him you are not taking anymore cash out of bank that that is for children's education later . Get a job and contribute , its hard for most people to make it comfortably on a single income. Try splitting all bills down the middle, and having two young children isn't an excuse not to work , in fact its a reason to work .
2007-05-22 06:53:36 · answer #4 · answered by Lee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not give him any of that money....infact I would move it to another account if possible. he sounds like he is draining you dry financially and if he isn't giving you anything but the bare essientials then I certainly wouldn't dip into that money.
I also would make sure that if you buy or build a house that your name is on the deed to that home otherwise you don't have any rights to the house if he leaves you.
2007-05-22 06:44:52 · answer #5 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
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Good luck
2007-05-24 06:00:45 · answer #6 · answered by Henry 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well Duhhh? Tell the louse to get a job ..even if its at McDonalds(no dis there Mickie D) and show you he is willing to contribute to the household and relationship...kept men are not a bargain! If he won't work ..kick him to the curb Hunny!
2007-05-22 06:45:33 · answer #7 · answered by lauryames 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He's a greedy jerk that wants you to finance him. Do not do this!!!
2007-05-22 07:16:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OBVIOUSLY !!!!
2007-05-22 06:42:32 · answer #9 · answered by aunt_webby 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋