I feel a lack of identity with my ethnic heritage.?

Question

My grandmother was of english/scottish. My other grandmother and two grandfathers were of German/Russian Jewish descent. All my relatives have been living in America for about five generations. Thus, they have all lost a sense of culture. I feel that American culture is bland, and I wish to have a connection with my ethnic heritage. How do I do this? Even if I try, won't it be like pretending something I am not? I mean, culture is supposed to go from parent to child. Would it be cheating not getting culture through that process. Any advice please.

Answer 1

First off, I would like to commend you for being honest about the fact that GENERIC American culture is bland. This is why I have such issues with those Americans who insist on everything just being "American". I have two suggestions based on what you say but in order to get to my first one let me take a minute and explain something.

Regardless of what so many may say, I strongly feel that the U.S. has cultures but it’s just so diverse and varying that it's impossible to encourage any kind of generic “American culture”. You wind up drilling everything down to nothingness with people being deprived of any kind of meaning. It would be the same as if you said we couldn’t have French, German, British and Italian culture and everything must only be “European” and anything different isn’t allowed. Everywhere you go you see Americans being so ignorant they argue that a person wearing corporate products like Nike shoes constitutes American culture or even generic things like “freedom” or “diversity” as if most of the advanced world wasn’t free or at least somewhat diverse too. This isn’t a new phenomenon. Even Nathaniel Hawthorne living in the 1800’s and of mostly British descent like so many other early Americans hinted at the problem that long ago when he said: "At present, we have no country – at least, none, in the sense in which an Englishman has a country. I never conceived, in reality, what a true and warm love of country is, till I witnessed it in the breasts of Englishmen. The States are too various and too extended to form really one country. New England is quite as large a lump of earth as my heart can really take in." You must remember he said that way before there was even massive immigration from Ellis Island and now we're supposed to consider ourselves just "American" with all these thousands of different variations? To say nothing of all the political correctness with so many average Americans agreeing now that only indigenous people are real American anyway? This is why I consider myself a Southerner and advocate regional and other types of American cultures. It IS very possible to separate culture with nationhood despite the fact that so many Americans nowadays seem to have issues with it.

Based on what you say and everything I see out there I would advise you to do one of two things to find the meaning you are seeking: either go regional American or go Jewish. I don't know where you grew up so I can't help you there but there are many Americans who identify themselves as Midwesterners and New Englanders, etc. so it's not just Southerners. It's important to remember the U.S. is very big in terms of both population and area. It's like many different lands in our big nation but they need to be enhanced.

In terms of your ancestry, I'd say it may be interesting to read about your British ancestors but you probably won't find much modern day meaning in it because most British people don't have that strong of a culture and identity to bond with an American who merely has some British ancestry. I mean, almost all of my ancestors are British and I don't feel that much for it and they would agree it's really nothing to simply have British ancestors if you live somewhere else. To them, a Briton is a British citizen only and some would add even more details. Not only that but many Americans get on these boards and constantly try to kiss up to them by saying their ancestors are British so that most Britons honestly look down on all that desperation and yes, I’ve seen them laugh about it. Very much like cheating as you say. Since many of your ancestors were Jewish that should be more promising- esp. since they are totally different from the British. Jews generally have a much stronger culture and are concerned about their declining numbers with their relatively low birth rate and high rate of interfaith marriages. If you go to Jewish websites and hang out with other Jews they can probably help you with your quest on that if you so choose. It's very commendable that you are honest about your feelings because, believe me, they won't go away and I hope you find the meaning you're seeking- esp. if you ever have children.

Answer 2

Yeah, I feel the same way. I want to have these deep traditions and a cultural identity that's not so mundane. So, I try to find sayings, food, music, rituals, myths from my background that also have personal meaning for me. That way, it doesn't feel false.
I talk to everyone. Everyone has a story. I was raised Christian, but had the good fortune of growing up in a Jewish neighborhood. Call your local synagog and talk to the rabbi about your curiosity. It may sound intimidating, but most people want to help. I'll bet that if he can't help you directly, he can get you started.
Do you come from Greek Othodox? Call the church. Find German organizations. Do as search for "Scottish" and your town.
Just start talking to people. You'll get ideas from others that you wouldn't have thought of. Someone will know someone else who can help you.
What an incredible journey for you!
Stay curious!

Answer 3

I totally understand. I am of mixed ethnicity also. Native: Cherokee, Jamaican, and English (or as some da British) eww. Not being hateful to the English, but you got so many people in the U.S., all like "Yeah, I'm British mate, spot of tea"? I hate those guys. But I too want a tradition. America is bland as said hands down. Your not going to boil my DNA to just blah, its something. I will not forget who I am, even though I wasn't really raised in it. I too have that problem with the whole cheating thing. I look into what I am, and I see that I totally relate to my Cherokee side. I'm not religious, (its just not me), but, I do dable in stuff like that more so with Asian-religion/Mythology, on because of my way of life. I live more so like a Native American, than my others. I dont know how to say, I dont want to offend. I just want to know me not some guess at who I'm suppose to be because of branding. I want me. Not a blame American, a real American, of today. I want my traditions now.

Answer 4

you can learn German and Russian. You could read about their culture and visit their nation. You could travel thruogh Britain, all through England and Scotland and talk to the people. You should really frind out your Grandmother's English or Scottish surname and research your family going back to the middle ages. I figured out my ancestors were knights.. you coud also read British history to know about the tribes of britain, the middle ages, the empire, and the modern.. You could also go take a trip to Germany in October for Oktoberfest in Bavaria and get drunk. The Germans are wonderfull people and I love being German..

Answer 5

Britain has been broken since the 1960s ended. She has quickly lost ground in her stability and she is not going to be getting back up on her feet for a very long time. With the influx of migrants making the "multicultural" mark on the land her identity has changed and all that she has right now is the traditions of a past age. They too are being rent apart from the multicultural population and the future of England will see a whole new identity.

Answer 6

I don't think that by learning more about your heritage or changing something in your life you would pretend to be something that you are not. It would be pretending if you made up false stories about who your ancestors were or about how you were raised, but you don't seem to have any such intentions. As long as you are honest and you only want to learn more or find what is right for you, it's in no way cheating or pretending. Yes, culture usually goes from parent to child, but it's not "forbidden" to search for cultural identity that you feel your parents did not convey you, I mean I really don't understand what should be bad about it. You should not worry about this. You should just try to learn more and see what's right for you.

And you see people can turn to a culture they were not raised in also if they don't even have any ancestors from that culture, if they feel that it's right for them. For example, there are people who convert to religions they were not raised in and that possibly no one in their family ever believed in, or people who marry into another culture and adapt to it. The way you were raised does not have to determine your whole life if you feel it's not right for you.

Answer 7

5 Generations mate. Quite a bit to start feeling lost here. First of all you are American so my advice as a foreigner will be to stick to what you are.

The Russians and Germans, well they are not going to miss you a single bit. For the Jews. Well Americans in general have issues with the Jews and the Jewish state of Israel.

You understand the irony here. Usually it is the big mouth dudes from Africa [where I am from too] that have problems with this - stick to American and learn about your heritage here mate!

Answer 8

Start by learning and then incorporating some of the Russian and English traditions. I have an English father and Dutch mother, it's not hard to mix other holidaytraditions and such in with what you currently have.

Answer 9

if american culture is so bland why is it so popular throughout the world? i think you better start learning more about your american heritage instead of disrespecting it. your american heritage comes from europe, asia, africa, the native americans, and everyone else that ever immigrated here with a desire to succeed and that is nothing to feel ashamed about.

Answer 10

I have thought about this subject also. I relate more to my regional culture in the south than to my ethnicity.

I do enjoy genealogy, because it brings history to life for me.