Am I overreacting?

Question

My husband has a subscription to Playboy. It's not that that so much bothers me. It's that he keeps them stacked on the back of the toilet, almost like a trophy. I haven't had much self esteem since my body has morphed from having our son almost 9 months ago, and having to look at the gorgeous women on the cover when I get in and out of the shower every day is a little disheartening to say the least. I go to the gym and try to stay in shape, but I recently found out I'm pregnant again. I don't want to think about my husband ogling beautiful naked women while I sit around getting bigger by the week. When I mention something about it, he says they have great articles and that I should read it some time. I say if I want to read a great article, I'll get a Newsweek. He's also young and in the Marines, and I don't want to be a nag, but it really hurts my feelings. How should we resolve this?

Answer 1

You're not overreacting. Reading Playboy for the articles is the #1 cliche excuse to look at naked women. If he wants to read good articles for men, get a subscription to Esquire or GQ. The writing is great and the articles are interesting. Your husband is looking at pornography, and it is disrespectful to you. Your husband should care enough about you to end his subscription, and even though your son is only nine months old, your husband should already be trying to set a good example. Put your foot down before this gets out of control.

Answer 2

I have to say that I understand exactly how you feel because I am going through the exact same thing. The difference is my husband likes going on the net looking up particular women versus magazines. I too am pregnant and pretty huge right now. lol
Secondly, let me say that you will probably get alot of answers saying that you're being insecure and to let your husband do what he wants. As a woman, when you don't feel particularly sexy and you see your husband ogling at other women, can sting a bit. And there is alot of women that will deny this which I don't understand why. There are many people that will say, well they are just pictures which is true. They are. And he is a man. Men are visual creatures. They have to see these things! lol Many, many men are insensitive.....and brave! (lol) They sometimes feel the need to test the level of your jealousy. My husband ogles at women when we're in public, on the net, and what ever else is thrown at him. It's almost as if he feels he's missing something.
But I have to say this, at least your husband has these books in the open and you know what he does. But if there are kids running around, he needs to be more mature and put them away. Playboy is not really anything to worry about. You have to remember that he is a man. If he was like my husband(literally starring at other women when he's out with you) then I would see a problem. I would say don't worry about it. Get a subscription to playgirl and have your fun. (just an idea) The more insecure you are, the more unattractive you will be. Trust me. You can't depend on a man to make you feel attractive and happy. You have to depend on yourself for that. Because when they don't follow through, you will only keep getting hurt. Find your strength and independence. And you know, I'm sure he still finds you attractive. It's just, naked women in a magazine will get any man's attention.
Ask him to put them somewhere else because you don't want to see them everyday because you find them tasteless and just leave it at that. No need to argue. :) If he respects you, he will do as you ask. Just remember this....if you try to stop him from looking at these magazines completely, he will start doing more and more things behind your back and then that's where the trust will start to fade. And being with someone you don't trust is a very unhappy life. (SORRY THIS IS SO LONG....LOL) I use to tell my husband that if he's going to look at things on the net or whatever else he does, at least don't let me see it but girl, when you find it by accident.....oh you talking about being pissed off!!! lol So ask yourself...what's worse?

Answer 3

Its funny how somethings can be blown so out of proportion. Lets start by saying that my husband has a subscription to playboy. I got it for him when he came back from Iraq. Im not pregnant so I dont have the hormone issue but I am overweight. So I know I dont look like those girls but I dont care either. I have read the playboys and they really do have some interesting articles and some funny jokes.

However the one thing I would definitely disapprove of it putting them in the bathroom on the back of toilet. Why dont you get him a nightstand with drawers in it for his side of the bed and he can put them in there.

If the only vice he has is his playboys then I would say that you should let that go. I would be more concerned if he wasnt coming home at night or stayed on the internet watching pornos all the time. Playboy does not promote men cheating on their wives and most men want to look at the magazine because they know more then likely they will never be able to have the woman in them but it is something they can use to fantasize about.

Let him have his magazines just tell him to put them away when he is done with them and not have them out where you have to see them all the time.

Answer 4

If it is hurting your feelings, you need to tell him! You have to have open, up front, honest communication in a marriage or you will be absolutely miserable, and who wants to go through life like that?? Making small sacrifices is part of a marriage. Your husband should be looking out for your feelings, not causing you pain. Your feelings are completely justifiable, and it’s not “nagging” to inform him that his choices are hurting you and damaging your self esteem. YOU should come FIRST. YOU are his WIFE. Treat him with respect, and demand that he do the same for you! Congrats on your pregnancy

Answer 5

For one....a woman is at her most beautiful when she is pregnant with a man's child if that man is in love with her.
And two...they always touch up those pics to make them all look beautiful and hide all of their body flaws.
And finally...try reading some of the articles and see if they really are interesting.
If none of this helps, get a magazine rack and sit it beside the toilet or behind it so you don't have to see them unless you look for them i.e. they are not staring you in the face.
Remember you are pregnant by the same man so obviously he still loves you or he would not be making babies with you like crazy...sounds like he is VERY attracted to you.

be cool...

Answer 6

You are who you are. If it hurts your feelings, then I wouldn't expect you'd be able to change how you feel about the situation. Express to him that it does hurt your feelings and why. If he loves you he should gladly correct his bad behavior to preserve the love between you.

With a child around, I would hate to have those playboys on display like that.

Answer 7

Tell him it really hurts your feelings. You don't seem to mind he has them, but with your body and hormones running a mock, seeing them hurts your feelings and makes you feel bad. If he can't get it, then cut out all the pictures and leave him with just the articles. What excuse does he have then, right?

Answer 8

If you were talking about any other nudey magazine you would have a poinT, but Play Boy actually does have really good articles.
If you are going to judge something for the pictures in it then you should also get rid of every fashion magazine and clothes catalog.
You are overreacting

Answer 9

Tell him to compromise........
He can keep the articles, but all the pictures of naked women must be torn out.

Answer 10

If it were me, I would ask, no tell him to stop ordering or buying them. And if he didn't, I would start buying Playgirl, and put those hot, tight mens bodies on the back of the toilet. Put the shoe on the other foot, and see how he likes it