I guess what I want to know is, through their written words, can you really get a grasp on what they are all about if you have been conversing on the computer? Or is it just your perception of what you hope they will be like or are? I am not talking physically, but mentally, can you really get to know a person well over the computer?
2007-05-21 10:35:40 · 7 answers · asked by casey308 2 in Computers & Internet ➔ Internet ➔ Other - Internet
I think it depends on your natural level of intuition and ability to view motives from all angles. If one is capable and savvy, then I would say yes, one can learn a great deal about a person over the internet. Sometimes it's not what they say, but how they say it, or what they don't say. You've got to be able to understand how people think, recognize all possibilities and read between the lines. With that, you can get a good flavor for an individuals character. That said, there are also those who are adept at deception. We must always maintain a healthy degree of skepticism, because we can never know for certain.
2007-05-21 13:11:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that "if they're not lying you can get to know them" is the core of it, but it is not quite everything. If they are not lying, then you can get to know a side of the person, but is that the whole person? Not really. That said, however, in person when you get to know someone they will also tend to be presenting a side or sides of themself, not necessarily the core of their being.
In real life, don't you find yourself acting slightly differently around different people, or see other people doing so?
In the same way, people sometimes come across differently on-line. Someone may tend to be more sarcastic, or more affectionate, or less shy on-line. It doesn't mean that you're not getting to know that person, but if you later meet them in person, you may find that the level of comfort in your interactions is different, or that they don't act quite the same. This doesn't have to mean that they are being false on-line or in person. It is just a different medium.
Now, if you are talking about romantic involvement, I would urge you to try to meet in person, not get involved on-line and hope that it will work in person.
While I have friends who have got romantically involved on-line and have met and had that relationship translate seamlessly into "real life" (and even go on to get married and start families), it is just as true that many people who get involved on-line romantically meet in person and the chemistry just isn't there in person. They could work well as friends, but just not quite feel the chemistry required for romantic involvement. I do not mean "they weren't attractive/hot/whatever enough". There's a lot more subtlety than that to the chemistry between two people, and I have seen people get hurt because they either were depressed about it not working out in "real life", or tried to make it work and it didn't make them happy.
So, can you get to know someone? Sure! Will that translate to friendship in person? Probably, but one or both of you may not feel as comfortable / may be shy in person. Will romantic involvement translate? That's harder to say, and there is much more of a risk that it won't.
2007-05-21 17:51:32 · answer #2 · answered by Stephen J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. Actually, if the person is being honest, you might get to know them better than anyone knows them in "real life". In RL we have to get past the physical and our own preconceived ideas of what someone is like, based on their appearance. Many people can't do that. Also, some people are a lot more shy in person than they are online.
However, I do think it takes time. Just like in a RL situation, a person might be on their best behavior, in the first days or weeks that you chat with them online. Give it plenty of time, if you aren't considering one day meeting this person. Pay attention to those clues that you get while chatting over that amount of time, as to whether or not they can be trusted.
2007-05-21 17:43:25 · answer #3 · answered by Krista 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's mostly what you WANT to see.
There are two types of people here...
1) The deceivers - They use the computer as a way to hide their true self.
2) The open doors - They use the computer as a SAFE way to open up themselves without letting someone get too close.
2007-05-21 17:46:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the person isn't lying on the other end, I do believe you can get to know someone online. If they are lying, you'll be getting to know who they want you to know, not who they are. The question should be... should you trust the person on the other end?
2007-05-21 17:38:35 · answer #5 · answered by -sunnirae- 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO WAY!!
They can be anyone from anywhere at all.
Don't believe anything they say OR pictures of them, they could have gotten them from Google Images!! There is no way to trust anyone on the internet at all.
2007-05-21 17:51:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Partly, but no, what you 'see' is totally behine the internet, ie, you are not going to hear the other person burp, or they have smell armpit etc.
2007-05-21 17:39:20 · answer #7 · answered by Cupcake 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋