This happened a couple of months ago. My husband and i we had a fight.He has been cheating me from the very beginning ( 5 Years) with his secretive messages from his mobile phone It took place in front of my mom. Kind of ugly. He took all his stuff and just walked out the door to his moms, can you believe it. Before this he would never allow me to look or even read his messages on his phone. On that fine day i read one of the messages stating that she had some ovary pain and she called him sweetheart. Earlier to this i've seen certain messages that tottaly breaks my heart stating that their sex was good and i would just have a meltdown
I really want this relationship to work. HOw can he not understand the pain im goin through.I really love him.Help!!
2007-05-21 06:55:29 · 39 answers · asked by Sarah Ann 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Oh honey you will have to move on. There are words for guys like this but not here. You don't have a relationship you have a shipwreck. You poor girl just leave him and cut the ties. Why do you ladies put up with this kind of behaviour from a guy? It is one thing men like me just hurt over. I know three guys right now, one in the US one in NZ and one in the UK who all really want to be loyal and cherish a woman and none of them can find anyone. And still people like you stay with partners who are rats. Here's a hug and a hope and a prayer. Pack your bags (either physically or metaphorically) and split.
2007-05-21 07:19:26 · answer #1 · answered by pwwatson8888 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You may really love him...but it is obvious it is not mutual. Why put yourself through this? Don't you know you are worth so much more? What happens if he brings something home to you that you cannot get rid of?? This relationship was built on a foundation of lies and cheating ...it isn't going to change. I am sorry...but there is someone out there for you that will respect and love you and NOT cheat on you. You may feel this way now, that there is NOBODY in this world but him...maybe it is because he has broken your self confidence and esteem...but I tell you...you can find true love and there are men out there that are NOT dogs and that will love you faithfully. I wouldn't want to stay married to a man like that and have children and then have my children grow up and see the relationship the way you two have it and think that this is the way marriage is suppose to be...for instance if you had a son, would you want him to grow up thinking this is the way to treat a woman? And if you had a daughter, would you want her to think that is the kind of man she should settle for? I know you would want better for them, in turn want better for yourself...Do not let him take your self worth...Take care of yourself...do something good for YOU...get rid of him. Move on...I promise you it will be healthier and you will be thankful you did. God bless!
2007-05-21 07:03:02 · answer #2 · answered by Marriedtothearmy 2 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He understands the pain you are going through, he doesn't care. He has cheated from the beginning, so he isn't about to stop now, especially since you knew and still want him. It is time to move on, this guy doesn't care about you, he just wants a wife at home to take care of things, and then have his fun on the side. You deserve better.
When the pain outweighs the pleasure, it is time to get out. He has put you through enough pain for several relationships now. Find a man who cares about you and respects your feelings. There is one out there.
You know, he is going to cheat on her as well. So she is not getting any bargain out of the deal. Then the pain will be hers.
Good luck.
2007-05-21 07:05:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, I hate to say it like this....but he doesn't care if he's hurting you. If he did care, he would not have been cheating this entire time.
You need to get out of this relationship. He has been emotionally abusing you for years. You deserve better than this. The first clue was when he wouldn't let you read his messages. If someone has nothing to hide then it shouldn't matter if you read his messages. My fiance and I read each others' texts and even answer each others' phones.
I think it would be best for you to end it and move on. You deserve a partner that will respect you're feelings and love you the same way you love him. Yes, it hurts and its going to for awhile, but after you heal, you will be stronger than ever and you will realize that you deserve to be loved. Good luck. I wish you the best.
2007-05-21 07:03:25 · answer #4 · answered by Heartagram 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I didn't even have to read your story to answer this question. Right in the question you said, "this hurtful relationship." If it is a hurtful relationship, then it is time to move on. Upon actually reading the story, I'd say you need to call an attorney and find out what your options are. Your husband knows this is hurting you. He obviously only cares about his own ding-dong. Get a lawyer and send him packing before he hurts you more, or worse yet, your kids. If you have kids (you don't say if you do), they are essentially learning how NOT to have a loving relationship as they witness this. Best to show them that there are consequences if you don't honor your marriage vows. Good luck!
2007-05-21 07:01:42 · answer #5 · answered by Mr. Taco 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all you need to love yourself before you do anything. With him hurting you like this why would you even want to still be with him? Once a cheater always a cheater. How can you just sit around and waste your life while this bastard is cheating on you and for FIVE years. He is NEVER going to change. You need to be the one to walk away since he already has too. And if he doesn't understand your pain then he never will. You need to get out of this relationship and trust me you will find love again!!
2007-05-21 07:01:00 · answer #6 · answered by heathermichelle9 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You want WHAT relationship to work ???. Wake up girl ! .From HIS side he hasn`t been in a relationship , at least not with YOU. This Man has just been using you for the last five years and playing you for a fool , but I suppose that after all this time , if you still believe that you`re still in a " Relationship " then he`s quite correct - you ARE a fool ! . Get some respect for yourself and leave this cheater . At least you`ll still have SOME dignity left to leave with .
2007-05-21 07:04:37 · answer #7 · answered by Hondaman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
MOVE ON! you dont deserve a sun of a ***** like that really. He's not worth it. I'm sure you'll find sombody who will love you in everyway and not cheat on you. If he loves that other chick let him be. You'll find sombody who's worth your wait and pain. Think of that and I'm sure you'll move on, and try not to stay away from dating it's always esaier to get on the go cause your mind is off the guy completly. Your not asking for a relationship while dating either. It's just for all the fun of meeting new people. And that special person may pop up while your on that go!
2007-05-21 07:01:48 · answer #8 · answered by Jimmy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure why you would want to stay in this relationship. You say he has been deceiving you for the last five years. If this is the case then you can't really be in love with him because the person you love doesn't exist. It's all based on lies.
I hope you can find the courage and belief in yourself to know that you deserve better than this. Don't settle for less.
Good Luck!
2007-05-21 07:00:45 · answer #9 · answered by Just Me 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to leave him sweetie... No relationship is worth staying if your partner is cheating... Right now you are hurt and think you want him, but if you concentrate on what he is doing, you will realize that he is not the best thing for you... There are plenty men out there... and I am sure that you will find someone to respect and love you, in the way that you deserve... Good Luck and be strong
2007-05-21 07:02:23 · answer #10 · answered by Oula 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋