Why do we want to control the morrow, knowing fully well how uncertain the future can be?

Question

Are we all the time fighting with uncertainty, inviting stress and worry ahead of the event and more often than not, disappointment after the event?

Answer 1

You answered your own question. The reason we want to control tomorrow is BECAUSE we know how uncertain the future can be.

Such control is obviously impossible, but that doesn't stop us from WANTING to control it.

Answer 2

We want to control it because we want to be in control. If we admit that we arent in control some people would go crazy. Some people like to plan the future knowing that it might not turn out that way but at least they have a plan for now. They want to feel secure and know that everything is going to be okay or even better than okay tomorrow. So we try to control it. Even though we all know inside that this doesnt work and only leads to more harm if we arent willing to change these plans along the way.

Answer 3

I know! I have a friend who wants everything for certain, everything exactly where she wants it to be, or else she is deeply unhappy. I don't get it. The only thing to do is thrive on NOW (not that we shouldn't have plans and goals, etc, but allow for pssible change) and tomorrow will shape itself accordingly. That's the Taoist philosophy, and Christ hits on it in his "consider the lilies" speech. In other words, "CHILL". We do build up expectations, mostly to our detriment, of events, people, environments, but if we just accept things as they are, we find out whether or not we truly fit with these people, events and places in a clearer way than if we try to make ourselves fit to them. I have had a very blessed life ever since I stopped trying to control it and just started accepting it. We must embrace uncertainty. The people who have embraced uncertainty are the ones who have changed the world for the better. The people who have tried to control their world are the ones who have done the opposite. Why do we do it, though? It might have something to do with losing the control our hunter ancestors used to have. In modern society we are now provided, through capitalism, with our food and clothing and we are deprived of control of these basic things, so we now look for control over what's left - our emotional lives. And if we don't even have that, we try to control the lives of others. Most of us wouldn't even know we do it, but we do. Surely a set-up for disappointment?

Answer 4

You are on your away to an appoint. You worry that you might be late. You worry you might have an accident. You worry that the outcome will be bad.

Or, you could simply go to the appointment. Worry is a chosen way to think and to think about the world.

We do a fantastic job of stressing ourselves out or of frightening ourselves.

If you arrive at the appointment on time and with no accident, what was the point of the exercise of worrying yourself?

Answer 5

It is what differentiates us from the other animals of this planet. We use today what we learned in the past to prepare for an event in the future. Man has developed a vivid imagination doing this, sometimes to his detriment.

Answer 6

From the time we are in school we are encouraged to think ahead. You choose your subjects based not on your interests but which will help you get ahead in life.we see our parents struggling to save money for 'our future' the future , it seems is more important to us than the present ! we are frightened of 'letting go' of this 'worry' this 'worry' keeps us fully occupied & finally immobilizes us

Answer 7

Much of what I plan in terms of tomorrow is not so much an act of control, as it is an act of hope.

Answer 8

“I did not direct my life. I didn't design it. I never made decisions. Things always came up and made them for me. That's what life is.” ~~ B. F. Skinner