I feed the baby & chage him & get him dress & I get up every 3 hr yell he sleep all night
2007-05-20 15:14:25 · 17 answers · asked by kitty 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Too bad, sorry to hear that. I can't speak for your husband but I always viewed my daughter as equal responsibility between my wife and myself, I fear however that not many men feel that way. I think you should express how you feel to him, but I doubt he's going to get it, as he already doesn't seem to.
2007-05-20 15:18:54 · answer #1 · answered by Timothy B 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Do you both work outside the home? If you don't then he shouldn't be doing anything at night. He goes to work and you can be more on the baby's schedule at night and during the day.
When he gets home form work he should definitely give you a break and then once a week you BOTH need to get out and be together for the night.
This is pretty normal for a guy I think and you both need to understand that this phase doesn't last forever. The baby should be sleeping through the night after 6 months so just suck it up. The diaper phase lasts longer but it too gets better as time goes on.
I will say that personally getting up at night was impossible for me. I just couldn't do it. So I tried to make up for it during the daylight hours with playing and feeding and diaper changing. He has got to give you some kind of break.
I have to disagree with anyone that says to "force" your baby on him. The reality is that some men have zero patience for babies and end up hurting them in an instance. Under no circumstances should you leave your baby with ANYONE reluctant to watch him. Even the father.
2007-05-20 15:30:17 · answer #2 · answered by joker 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Wow that is sad.. I loved My Son so much I had Him in my arms more than My Ex, which in fact She was lax on the same thing you Hubby is.
My advice would be try to talk to him one last time. set him down explain that you had to carry him for nine months all to your self he didn't have to carry anything.
You are tired need your rest to be healthy, it is his place to see that you are taken care of, not an option as He may think.
set up schedule say I got 1 you go 1, that way you each will have 5 hrs or more in sleep at least.
If he doesn't want to be Involved reconsider His part in your life, He is showing you now how hew will always be. take a deep look and follow your heart..
2007-05-20 15:26:54 · answer #3 · answered by onnie1964 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
you need to tell your hubby, in the presence of a trusted friend, that you need a 3 day break. He has to take over for you, including getting the baby to take a bottle.
Then leave.
when you come back, he will be SO HAPPY to have half-time off to himself, and he'll never forget it.
He iwll never learn how much work it is until he does ALL OF IT himself.
and if his solution is to get a nanny, then you have help. Either way you win. Just three days.
Either way, don't be a doormat and pretend he will change without a swift kick in the rear.
Good luck
2007-05-20 15:32:00 · answer #4 · answered by emagidson 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I will tell you exactly what you need to do - you need to read him the riot act - you got to tell him its his kid also, you both have a full time job on your hands with a kid and theres no questions hes got to start being a proper father and make hs kid proud of him
You got to lay down the law honey (and not run away / seperate like all these losers are saying trying to break things up even more)
2007-05-20 16:03:18 · answer #5 · answered by peter w 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he works a full time job that he has to get up in the morning, you really shouldn't expect him to get up with him.
During the day though, when the baby cries for something, be busy with something and say, "oh, will you grab him?". When he does, continue with, "I think he might be hungry, do you mind, while I finish these dishes?"
Or just be blunt and say, "I could use a little help here, after all his is YOUR baby too!"
2007-05-20 15:54:19 · answer #6 · answered by casper 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My daughter is 5 months old, and my husband hasn't gotten up once either. It is my job.....I stay at home, and he works. I love taking care of my daughter. When she is upset, it is me she looks for.....I am her lifeline, and I suspect that your son feels the same about you. Don't get bogged down with the "i did that last time" thing, because your son is only going to feel tension he doesn't need.....the two of you should be stumbling over each other to take care of him....and if not, then you, as his mother, need to pick up the slack.
2007-05-20 15:31:25 · answer #7 · answered by salemgirl1972 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Join the Mommy Club!
2007-05-20 15:18:39 · answer #8 · answered by munich13 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everything that you are doing is perfectly okay. Most dads
are not comfortable with small babies. Try feeding your
baby at bedtime, this will allow him to sleep longer.
2007-05-20 15:35:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry, that your husband is such a selfish lazy bum. I'm a father of 3 kids and with all 3 kids I fed and changed their diapers, get them dressed, and took turns with my wife getting up with the kids during the night. With our youngest son, when he was a newborn, he was usually up at night, so I stayed up at night with him, I wasn't working at the time. My wife was working during the days, and I stayed up with him till she came home from work and I got sleep then. With our 2 older kids, I took turns getting up with them during the night.
Because I viewed it as part of my responsibility as the father to my kids.
2007-05-20 15:35:47 · answer #10 · answered by Bryan M 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋