Why cant god let me be straight?

Question

I am 17, and I hate being gay, I hate it. I hate myself. Why won't god help me? It affects everything I do. I want to be straight so bad. I just want to love girls.

Answer 1

If you want to love girls, then love girls...if you don't love girls, don't let society tell you that you must
God made you what you are, whatever that is

Answer 2

There are many asweres on here and you may no even read mine, but i feel like I need to say something.

First if you are christian, PLEASE don't let these people tell you there is no god. And definatly don't let these christians tell to to
-pray the gay away
-join a youth group because it'll help you
-be gay but don't participate in gay activeites.

Just be you. People need to stop trying to speak for god. He made you gay because God makes everyone DIFFERENT!

You're 17 and if you are just coming to terms with your sexuality, you're going to hate it. There arent going to be people you identify with and people are going to hate you for being but. But guess what, people are ignorant and dont understand, they are just quick to judge.

Things will get better as you get older. You'll find other gay friends. You'll even find straight friends who can accept you for who you are and tell you that you are a cool person.

I know the feeling of wanting to be straight soooooo bad because you see the kids around you with their girlfriends and its tough.

Even now in my 20's I sometimes think "how would life have been if I was straight" I know I wouldnt have learn so much about the world.

Give it time...You're still young. It's hard but don't deny your sexuality, it'll only stress you out even more...

Answer 3

I want you to go to some counseling if possible for this, noone should hate themselves, it's not right.

I'll tell you my story.

I was born in Portugal, everyone there is Catholic. However I was never told that gay is wrong, never, there were no gay people that we knew, none on tv, and so forth. It wasn't a real concept for me, and it never got vilified by others. I actually didn't encounter the concept of gay as a moral definer until I was in my teens here in Canada, where it's also less prevalent.

But it didn't really impact me. I'd grown up with no definer there, to me gay was never good or bad, heck I had no clue other people were different, I just assumed they were all like me, noone told me any different. There was no pressure to conform.

So for me gay isn't good or bad, it just is. A trait, like my eye colour, nothing more. I am still a good person through and through, and refuse to be defined by this one measly tiny little fact. It doesn't run my life. I'm in a good longterm relationship with a man, I'm even hoping to have kids in my near future(yes biological kids, I'm gay not infertile). It hasn't changed my life, everything in life is as it should be, I didn't choose this, but I wouldn't choose to be different just for other people to be slightly more comfortable.

And that's the problem here. You're not broken, you don't need fixing. Someone else, an external factor, is what's making you feel like this is bad. It's not a natural behaviour to think this way, because I was raised without the tags and didn't naturally develop the thought that it's wrong.

So someone put this idea in your head that it's wrong, that it makes you less of a person, that you should hate yourself.

You need to ask yourself if you're wrong for being true to your nature, or if they're wrong for defining you solely based on sexual orientation? Do you want to live a life where others define who you are, without ever knowing you?

Gay is a part of you, a very very small part. It isn't good or bad, just is. It doesn't make you good or bad, it's not a moral definer. The only thing it says is that you're attracted to men, that's it. It doesn't decide your fate, it doesn't control you.

You're still in control of your life, you still decide what course it takes.

Don't sell yourself short on this one, you don't deserve it.

You're not broken, you don't need fixing, they do, the people who judge you without ever knowing you.

There's more to you than gay, remember that, there's way way way more. Don't let others use it to control you, it's not fair to you.


PS: I noticed some people put down your religion, I didn't. I will only say that the bible is up for interpretation. If you are Christian though, remember one very important thing, Jesus wasn't a gay basher, he never said a thing about it, he had a bigger message.

Answer 4

Well my tortured friend, there are some in religion who claim a "cure" but I'm rather dubious of the permanence of these cures if they are cures at all, and not some acceptance of something you are not. Paradoxically, the real kicker is, prayer is very powerful and There is a saint who works on lost causes. She was around l2 when she was attacked and killed by a would be rapist because
she would not bend her values.
She has been around for a long time. Her popularity peaked in the 19th century. She helped me with a huge problem. Oddly enough she will often let me know of her presence by rapping on wood. Not so much now the problem has resolved itself.
But I try to remember to thank St. Philomena when I can. You might give it a try..either way good luck.
And by the way, don't be getting into a self-hate
kind of mode-nothing you have done or thought is so bad that you have to get into that. You have lots of time to resove these things, and resolve they will.

Answer 5

Whoa, and I thought I was the only one who kept asking himself that question. Yes, why am I gay instead of being str8, but no I certainly do not blame God for this but some genetic defect that resulted in the production of an ambomination of nature like me. Yes, I definitely wish that I had a girlfriend, but just I can't seem to treat girls any differently from the way that I would treat any of the guys that I am friends with. And yes I seem to have more intimate attraction to the guys than to the girls. I simply just talk to girls but with guys I usually want to push our conversation to another certain level. You are certainly right that it affects everything that you do. I feel very uncomfortable when I get myself involved in every social circle. However, I think that the only way to get around this selfhatred is that it is some sort of fate that you were born with just like I have decided to accept it that way. However, even after this acceptance, I still hate myself for being gay.

Answer 6

My god I'm sorry you are going through this but get over yourself! There are people who are born with REAL mental and physical disabilities. Why won't god heal amputees? Why won't he make a retarded man into a genius? Why doesn't he revive stale born infants? These are all real problems that fate has dealt to people that they have no control over, they aren't getting any divine favors either, and they actually need it.

The reason he's not helping you is because YOU DON'T NEED IT! There is nothing wrong with you. So maybe you can try accepting yourself for who you are and then try to help people with actual problems. You gotta work with what ya got.

My advice, find a nice guy that you feel comfortable with. Give the relationship a chance, see what it's like to fall in love. Maybe the relationship will work out, maybe not, but if you keep trying chances are you will find someone and you'll probably love it. Just give love a chance and see what happens, have some faith in love, you'll be all the better for it.

Answer 7

What?

Owh no you didn't just say hate being gay!!!? No waii!! That's the worst thing to say. I love gay guys more than straight. I wish you'd live here where I live, so I can support you til no ends.

Owh mang...people who are different gets treated by violence. To me, if a straight guy stands up for a gay guy, the others will begin to call the straight names as well. I feel so horrible to know I, we, live in such a homophobic land; I cannot blame you finding guys attractive either haha.

Omg, don't like girls. Step off n stop right there!
I don't see anything good about girls to love nowadays. Too much drama, too much fakes n lies. Owh no you don't wanna be straight you're kidding me?!! How can you not find girls annoying? If you think no one loves you, still got yourself...and me. Though, I dunno you still...I want to be supportive when you're down about the fact that you are gay; and I also want you to know that it's alright.

Calm down, sweet silly bean. Haha...guess all I can tell you is to be strong, dear, cuz you must know that the strongest human being are gays.
I admire y'all, and always wish you guys the best in life.

Answer 8

Okay i dont know if this will help you or do anything to make you re-asses the way you are looking at things, but you need to get some positive influences around you. I'm 26 gay and couldn't be happier, there is nothing wrong with being gay i suggest you come to terms with it because it wont get any easier, there isnt an ointment you can rub on before you got to bed and wake up and its all gone.

I would be asking myself "What sort of people are around me making me feel as if i am doing something wrong?"

I grew up in a family who were very much into our loacl church, i took me 4 times to get through to my mother that i was gay. Before being told that i would be going to hell and am an imbarrisment. That was when i was 17, im now 26 and those same people who were telling me that were at my commitment ceremony when i was 22.

I say the problem is you are looking at it completly wrong. I never had the choice to be gay it was never a decision i made but you know what i would NEVER change it. And i feel really sorry for you thinking that there is something wrong with you. How can we be judged for something we cant control.

I had a choice (as im sure alot of us have) to hide my feelings away or come to term that boobys dont do it for me. Thats was it, i was gay or i wasnt! But i was gay, so i had to deal with it, and i did. I didnt want to waste my youth hating myself for something i had no control over.

You need to surround yourself with people who can help change your view on the whole situtation. There are so many ourtreaches to help you love who you are. God the internet (used correctly) will help you find youth groups you can go have a blast and enjoy life with. Dont sit and mope round saying you hate yourself and "you just wanna love girls" when you really need to be saying "**** i only get one chance at this gay, straight, bisexual, asleep or 90yrs old with 2 bum legs" LIFE IS TOO SHORT to let pass you by.

Not facing the what you already know will just hold you back from being the Awesome GAY person you were put on this earth to be.

I hope you keep your chin up sunshine, cause lifes real ugly looking at the ground all the time.

P.S, LISTEN TO CYNDI LAUPER "SHINE" cause there is a community and a god that will "Stand by you, dont try and push them away cause there just gonna stay. YOU CAN SHINE"

Answer 9

God will not answer you because he thinks you already know the answer. If you dont want to be gay, then try talking to straight boys and get tips on how to get a lady, or email my friend godess539, he'll help indeed. He's like a guru. But if you know you are straight up gay and just cant help yourself, be yourself, build up your confidence and self esteem and say love me or hate me, i am me.

Answer 10

Occams razor. The explanation that makes the less assumptions is usually the right one. You tell me: what makes the most assumptions 1) Energy always existed. 2) An omnipotent, omniscient, and all loving being always existed. Clearly energy is the simpler one and thus is the one most likely to exist eternally. To illustrate this further lets say you lost your sock. How would you explain it. 1) you misplaced it 2) An alien in a flying saucer tried to abduct you in the dead of night, but it missed and abducted your sock instead. Both are possible explanations but 2 assumes too much. As does the existence of God to explain the existence of the universe.

Answer 11

Why do you hate being gay? Why do you want to be straight? And, why do you think you are gay?
You are gay because that is who you are. Please, don't hate yourself.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with being gay.
I, myself am gay. I am also 17.
I know it can be very tough at this age, but, please know it is ok.
Being gay is not a life style you choose to live, but it is a sexual preference, whom do you find more attractive.
Please know it is ok and that there is nothing wrong with you. If people are telling you otherwise, do not listen to them. You are a normal human being, just like everyone else in this world.